This is a subject I am passionate about: being genuine. But I am growing concerned that "being genuine" is not what our congregations want, nor is it what the world wants.
I am a new pastor (only been ordained since February) but have been serving as a full-time worship leader since August of 2015 and served in various roles in my church for years before that. One of the compliments I have always received (especially as a worship leader) has been that I am genuine. People do not perceive me as "putting on airs" or anything like that. I am honest about who I am and why I believe what I believe. I follow our Lord because I am convinced that it is only through Him that life is worth living. I am convinced that I should not hide my faith in Him because part of living a life through Him is the need to share Him with others. I do not drink alcohol, but not because of some "rule" but because when I do I can get "friendly" with women and I have no desire to make anyone else uncomfortable or to distress my wife in any way. I do my best to "do unto other as I'd have them do unto me" because I have seen that this attitude is far more effective than bullying others. I have plenty of failings (I am not patient with those who do not wish to truly listen to advice, only take up my time and theirs with complaining about heir "lot" in life; I like to hear myself talk; I have an ego that is way too easy to stroke; plus many more...), but I try to be honest about them and often use the as object lessons for others and a way to connect with them.
So, what does this have to do with people not actually wanting me to be genuine?
I am firmly convinced that we are supposed to cultivate relationships both within the church and without. I have friends who are not Christian who seem to like my company, up until I talk about my faith, my church life (which is my job, by the way...others can talk about their jobs, but not me!), how God has helped me through some tough times. At church, people only want to talk to me about either worship music or church business. There is no hint that I have a life or interests outside of the business of running church. I am a believer that your faith should interweave throughout all your life, not just be at church. The world should see my faith, but not as "that weird religious guy," but rather as a man who is of God but who is also approachable and will not judge them--a man who is here for them. Still, this attitude causes me to feel very lonely much of the time.
I see this line between "church" people and the rest of the world. And, yes, I know Jesus warned us that man would hate us for our faith but I don't believe that's what I am seeing. I am seeing "church" people withdrawing from the world so they are content and happy inside their own support structures (like the church) and not have to interact with those who need to know the Good News from them!
Should we as "church" people be a bit better at having one foot in both worlds?
I am a new pastor (only been ordained since February) but have been serving as a full-time worship leader since August of 2015 and served in various roles in my church for years before that. One of the compliments I have always received (especially as a worship leader) has been that I am genuine. People do not perceive me as "putting on airs" or anything like that. I am honest about who I am and why I believe what I believe. I follow our Lord because I am convinced that it is only through Him that life is worth living. I am convinced that I should not hide my faith in Him because part of living a life through Him is the need to share Him with others. I do not drink alcohol, but not because of some "rule" but because when I do I can get "friendly" with women and I have no desire to make anyone else uncomfortable or to distress my wife in any way. I do my best to "do unto other as I'd have them do unto me" because I have seen that this attitude is far more effective than bullying others. I have plenty of failings (I am not patient with those who do not wish to truly listen to advice, only take up my time and theirs with complaining about heir "lot" in life; I like to hear myself talk; I have an ego that is way too easy to stroke; plus many more...), but I try to be honest about them and often use the as object lessons for others and a way to connect with them.
So, what does this have to do with people not actually wanting me to be genuine?
I am firmly convinced that we are supposed to cultivate relationships both within the church and without. I have friends who are not Christian who seem to like my company, up until I talk about my faith, my church life (which is my job, by the way...others can talk about their jobs, but not me!), how God has helped me through some tough times. At church, people only want to talk to me about either worship music or church business. There is no hint that I have a life or interests outside of the business of running church. I am a believer that your faith should interweave throughout all your life, not just be at church. The world should see my faith, but not as "that weird religious guy," but rather as a man who is of God but who is also approachable and will not judge them--a man who is here for them. Still, this attitude causes me to feel very lonely much of the time.
I see this line between "church" people and the rest of the world. And, yes, I know Jesus warned us that man would hate us for our faith but I don't believe that's what I am seeing. I am seeing "church" people withdrawing from the world so they are content and happy inside their own support structures (like the church) and not have to interact with those who need to know the Good News from them!
Should we as "church" people be a bit better at having one foot in both worlds?