I know it is a requirement we fast as Christians and if we don't it is sin. I have been keen to try it for this reason.
One night (few days ago) I *tried* to get close to God and prayed for Him to help me fast and desire to know Him and how long I must fast. I got a "three day" pop in my head, then a "two day". I never ever hear from God and suffer from mental illness quite badly so never know God's voice
. I have prayed to hear Him and soften my heart to Him but my heart is continuously cold to Him. I don't desire to know Him or want to love Him and I don't know why. I do pray but never get His voice in me at all. I don't even know if I am saved.
Well, I tried to that evening and my stomach was so sore. You see, I suffer from an undiagnosed stomach condition (waiting to see a specialist) and have stomach pain all day. The pain is often unbearable. I tried fighting it and reading the bible it didn't work. I ate under huge guilt from God but the pain didn't go away. I also get painful palpitations every day so it scares me I'm going to die.
Today I came across a fasting video and didn't watch it as I'm unwell every day (think I'm being attacked by witchcraft). And they say all the usual, drink water (I did do this), read the bible (tried this), ask God first (did this), try other fasts etc. But God NEVER speaks to me! After the video I now feel huge (Godly?? Don't know) guilt to not eat tonight. I did eat a yoghurt today before watching the video. I want to fast so I can not go to hell but I'm a failure. I feel if I eat tonight I'm going to be in hell fire. But how do I even fast when I'm continually I'll with mental illness, weakness, palpitations, tiredness, fatigue and this is without fasting! How do you even read the bible when your stomach is killing you and you are crying from hunger? And your eyes are so sore? And your heart seems to be playing up? People told me its suffering for Christ to be like Him but I can't function like this!
One night (few days ago) I *tried* to get close to God and prayed for Him to help me fast and desire to know Him and how long I must fast. I got a "three day" pop in my head, then a "two day". I never ever hear from God and suffer from mental illness quite badly so never know God's voice
. I have prayed to hear Him and soften my heart to Him but my heart is continuously cold to Him. I don't desire to know Him or want to love Him and I don't know why. I do pray but never get His voice in me at all. I don't even know if I am saved.
Well, I tried to that evening and my stomach was so sore. You see, I suffer from an undiagnosed stomach condition (waiting to see a specialist) and have stomach pain all day. The pain is often unbearable. I tried fighting it and reading the bible it didn't work. I ate under huge guilt from God but the pain didn't go away. I also get painful palpitations every day so it scares me I'm going to die.
Today I came across a fasting video and didn't watch it as I'm unwell every day (think I'm being attacked by witchcraft). And they say all the usual, drink water (I did do this), read the bible (tried this), ask God first (did this), try other fasts etc. But God NEVER speaks to me! After the video I now feel huge (Godly?? Don't know) guilt to not eat tonight. I did eat a yoghurt today before watching the video. I want to fast so I can not go to hell but I'm a failure. I feel if I eat tonight I'm going to be in hell fire. But how do I even fast when I'm continually I'll with mental illness, weakness, palpitations, tiredness, fatigue and this is without fasting! How do you even read the bible when your stomach is killing you and you are crying from hunger? And your eyes are so sore? And your heart seems to be playing up? People told me its suffering for Christ to be like Him but I can't function like this!