things are bad

EPHESIANS6:10-11

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Things are very bad right now ...am losing my faith and i dont even know why i am
My mental health has gotten so bad that i cant make discussions for my self
My husband getting sick of going around in circles with me wanting to Christianity and wanting to follow Buddhism the reason things have gotten so bad is that i wanted to do mindfulness and meditation ( I Have OCD its meant to help that but it just got out of control ) i no longer have a therapist as she said she done all she can for me with my OCD and she cant see me for any more appointments because of NHS funding only funds 6 block appointments at a time and i cant afford non NHS therapy
I thought i was seeing my psychiatrist this month on the 24th but am not until march 29th
i see someone from the care team at my church about this but am unsure what they can do for me
I feel so tired i keep crying and wanting to self injure a lot my husband has hidden all the knifes in the house so i cant get them to use
I feel so stupid for going around in these circles i dont want to loses Jesus and i dont want to lose my husband because of this
My husband isn't Christian but he said the church and my friends at church would wounder whats is going on with me and why i have pulled back from them
I am sitting here crying because of this am meant to be at a bible study tonight it started at 6pm and finishes at 10.30 pm what i told them that i needed time to think
What have i done ?
I keep going around in these circles all the time and i dont know why its gotten worse since my step dad died ( he killed himself ) i cant get it over it and it was nearly 5 years since
I was doing it before my step dad died but not as bad as this am changing my mind one half of the day and the other part of the day i change it back again
the demons are watching me there trying to catch me out makes me do bad things
i dont know what to do :destroyed:
 

Thir7ySev3n

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You do realize that you don't have to be a Buddhist to meditate or learn the art of meditation right? Meditation is easily performed without anti-Christ philosophies as it only requires calmness of mind and the absence of thought (in some cases, simply the absence of particularly negative thought), which can be achieved with deep, slow breathing, "concentrating" on nothing (sometimes this can require a lot of practice) and even some natural, health supplements (like L-theanine, which is a naturally occurring ingredient in green tea that greatly reduces the effects of stress response in the brain). It is also important to note that Christ was not provided as some cosmic stress reliever but to be the LORD and saviour of our souls, and that there are other reasons to affirm the truth of the Christian faith than merely experiential or emotive sources.

It is good that you realize we have an enemy, that much is obvious from the Scriptures and the trials we endure in efforts to live a life pleasing to God. It is also obvious from the Scriptures that those trials that we endure, from the enemy, from the world and from our own flesh are also the destiny of every Christian so long as we live in our current flesh in the current godless state of our world. This is why Jesus and His disciples warned us and encouraged us countless times throughout the Scripture concerning these trials (John 16:3, 1 Thessalonians 3:3, 1 Peter 1:6, 2 Peter 2:9), and explicated that many would apostatize on account of these trials. These are the seeds who grew up among thorns, who at first receive the message with joy but then the worries and pleasures of this life choke the message, and it becomes unfruitful for them (Matthew 13:22). Withdrawing from Christ and other Christians is certainly not going to help you in your times of trial, as only God can provide you the strength to sustain you through your trials and the company of other Christians who are living godly lives will provide you great encouragement.

God will sustain you in all things, but He will not do the work for you when it is at least partly within your power to control your flesh and circumstances. The purpose of all trials is to develop godly character and perseverance, and to draw us to God so that we remember our need of Him and demonstrate the sincerity of our commitment to Him as more than just saviour, but LORD as well. Trials are opportunities to recognize the areas of our lives that need correction or improvement, and in this case allow your weaknesses to draw you to God and rely on His strength because "blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be satisfied (Matthew 5:6)."
 
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EPHESIANS6:10-11

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You do realize that you don't have to be a Buddhist to meditate or learn the art of meditation right?"
yes i know but for some reason i cant separate the christian part and see meditation and mindfullness as anything other from Buddhism, they should be stand alone activities to be able to do and shouldnt need to be linked to Buddhism but i cant seem to see it...i can do mindfulness but the meditation i find hard too do what dont help is that my incense burner has has a Buddha on it ( it was a gift from a family member )
I have to have some kind of music on when am trying to meditate i cant have silence the music i have been useing is a nature sounds but its also has buaddhist chants in it i could try and listen to classical but am unsure if it will work ... I could try it and get a new incense burner asap
thank you for posting back to me
 
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Thir7ySev3n

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yes i know but for some reason i cant separate the christian part and see meditation and mindfullness as anything other from Buddhism, they should be stand alone activities to be able to do and shouldnt need to be linked to Buddhism but i cant seem to see it...i can do mindfulness but the meditation i find hard too do what dont help is that my incense burner has has a Buddha on it ( it was a gift from a family member )
I have to have some kind of music on when am trying to meditate i cant have silence the music i have been useing is a nature sounds but its also has buaddhist chants in it i could try and listen to classical but am unsure if it will work ... I could try it and get a new incense burner asap
thank you for posting back to me

My pleasure. Regarding your immediate post, the issue is that you are falsely equating meditation with Buddhism. Buddhism adopted meditation, not vice versa. Meditation is a state of mind, nothing more. Anything in addition to this basic practice is ideological and ultimately irrelevant to the process unless you are more focused on adopting the philosophies of Buddhist meditation than on the act of meditation itself. Just disassociate in every way possible these anti-Christ Buddhist philosophies from the act of meditation, understanding that meditation is in no way unique to Buddhism. I would recommend replacing any sounds or visuals associated with Buddhism from your household and keeping the nature or other peace sounds as a means to enhance your meditative experience. Simply enjoy the relaxation that occurs during the act of meditation and focus on your calm breathing and the pleasant, peaceful sensations you're experiencing. Detatch yourself from all negative thoughts and ideas, and try to remember and contemplate Scriptures concerning the love of God reflected through the person of Jesus Christ. For example, continue to remind yourself in your quietness of mind to "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28)," and to "cast all your anxiety on him because He cares for you (1 Peter 5:7)." Always focus on the person of Christ and the love, peace, joy and soundness of mind that belong to you in Him (Romans 14:17).
 
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Ok from what I know of therapists and mindful menditation basically means just Sit still and be silent and WAIT. Think of God and LISTEN.


Thats all.

Theres a scriputre in psalms that says Be still and know I AM God.
Remember God said to Moses,when he asked his name and God said I AM THAT I AM?
God doesnt need to explain Himself. He just is. He created all things, you me, the entire universe. He is much bigger than we can conceive. And bigger than all your problems. nOthing is impossible for Him.

Please it has nothing to do with buddhism and if you have any buddhist idols etc just get rid of them, dont use them, you dont need them. Praying for you.
 
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wagingwar

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I have had OCD most of my life. The past seven years it's been at it's worse. The triggers became more numerous and intense, and my emotional state from the triggers began to last days and weeks instead of just minutes or hours. To make a long story short, I realized I had better win this war or else I was going to lose my mind. I also realized (with the help of a relative) that it's the devil's job to make you believe you're too weak to win, that you've lost too much, that God's against you and so on. But it's all a lie. And it's also not about us, and how weak or strong we are. It's about how strong God is inside us. And God is just as strong on the inside of you, as he is on the inside of the apostle Paul, and even Jesus himself. God is the same strength in all of us. No one is weaker than another, we only "feel" like we're weaker. But feelings are "just" feelings. And feelings can't hurt us. They can only deceive us into believing things that can cause us to go in the wrong direction, or to stay in a mental state of defeat. Do what you know to do, stand up against the lies. If you go in the right direction against all feelings, no matter how intense they feel, you will see that all the lies, and all the feelings will have to bow the knee to your actions. When you make the decision that you're gonna win, you will find out that your will is so much stronger than your emotions ever were. A lot of Christians think faith is a feeling. There may be feelings that come with faith, but faith is not a feeling. Faith is a decision to act on God's word, even in the midst of intense fear, and overwhelming circumstances, and that is usually when we need faith anyway. You can do this, you have God on your side. The only thing stopping you is "you believing you can't". I have always been a shy introvert, sit in the back of the class with no friends kind of person. I was the biggest cry baby, loser you would ever meet, the weakest link in the chain. But I gotta hold of who God is in me, and stopped looking at the loser I was, and I am getting victory over all the lies, all the negative emotions, the ridiculous triggers, and the victim mentality. And so can you. Romans 8:37-39 YET IN ALL THESE THINGS WE ARE "MORE" THAN CONQUERORS and gain an overwhelming victory through Him who loved us [so much that He died for us]. For I am convinced [and continue to be convinced—beyond any doubt] that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present and threatening, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the [unlimited] love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. That verse came from the Amplified Bible, if you don't have one, you should get one and read the New Testament daily, and claim the promises of God in it. Let God be God in and through you to help others, and it will get your mind off yourself, which is an OCD person's worst enemy. Praying that God shows you that you can do this......through his power in you. And you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free John 8:32
 
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EPHESIANS6:10-11

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Ok from what I know of therapists and mindful menditation basically means just Sit still and be silent and WAIT. Think of God and LISTEN.


Thats all.

Theres a scriputre in psalms that says Be still and know I AM God.
Remember God said to Moses,when he asked his name and God said I AM THAT I AM?
God doesnt need to explain Himself. He just is. He created all things, you me, the entire universe. He is much bigger than we can conceive. And bigger than all your problems. nOthing is impossible for Him.

Please it has nothing to do with buddhism and if you have any buddhist idols etc just get rid of them, dont use them, you dont need them. Praying for you.
am getting rid of the idol my husband dont want to bin it , he said i should give it to my sister as she may have a use for it
she likes things like this , av been looking for a new incense burner but everywhere i look there is idols on them going to try a local shop to see if i can get one that is plain .
I e mailed the person am meant to be seeing on the 24th but i never got an e mail back and am worried she given the appointment to some one else ...i really need this appointment
 
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EPHESIANS6:10-11

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I have had OCD most of my life. The past seven years it's been at it's worse. The triggers became more numerous and intense, and my emotional state from the triggers began to last days and weeks instead of just minutes or hours. To make a long story short, I realized I had better win this war or else I was going to lose my mind. I also realized (with the help of a relative) that it's the devil's job to make you believe you're too weak to win, that you've lost too much, that God's against you and so on. But it's all a lie. And it's also not about us, and how weak or strong we are. It's about how strong God is inside us. And God is just as strong on the inside of you, as he is on the inside of the apostle Paul, and even Jesus himself. God is the same strength in all of us. No one is weaker than another, we only "feel" like we're weaker. But feelings are "just" feelings. And feelings can't hurt us. They can only deceive us into believing things that can cause us to go in the wrong direction, or to stay in a mental state of defeat. Do what you know to do, stand up against the lies. If you go in the right direction against all feelings, no matter how intense they feel, you will see that all the lies, and all the feelings will have to bow the knee to your actions. When you make the decision that you're gonna win, you will find out that your will is so much stronger than your emotions ever were. A lot of Christians think faith is a feeling. There may be feelings that come with faith, but faith is not a feeling. Faith is a decision to act on God's word, even in the midst of intense fear, and overwhelming circumstances, and that is usually when we need faith anyway. You can do this, you have God on your side. The only thing stopping you is "you believing you can't". I have always been a shy introvert, sit in the back of the class with no friends kind of person. I was the biggest cry baby, loser you would ever meet, the weakest link in the chain. But I gotta hold of who God is in me, and stopped looking at the loser I was, and I am getting victory over all the lies, all the negative emotions, the ridiculous triggers, and the victim mentality. And so can you. Romans 8:37-39 YET IN ALL THESE THINGS WE ARE "MORE" THAN CONQUERORS and gain an overwhelming victory through Him who loved us [so much that He died for us]. For I am convinced [and continue to be convinced—beyond any doubt] that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present and threatening, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the [unlimited] love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. That verse came from the Amplified Bible, if you don't have one, you should get one and read the New Testament daily, and claim the promises of God in it. Let God be God in and through you to help others, and it will get your mind off yourself, which is an OCD person's worst enemy. Praying that God shows you that you can do this......through his power in you. And you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free John 8:32
thank you for posting to me i kinda scared to let anyone in
scared am going to lose someone if i do
 
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paul1149

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kinda scared to let anyone in
scared am going to lose someone if i do
A long time ago I was a kid at a summer day camp. We were supposed to jump into the shallow end of the pool, but I was afraid of the water. A very wise counselor asked if I would jump in if he held my hand tightly the whole time. I said, sure, that would be no problem at all; and I did. Then he asked me to jump in holding onto four extended fingers of his hand. And I did. Then it was three fingers. No problem. I don't remember if he had to go beyond that. Soon i was jumping into the pool by myself, having the time of my life. I just needed that reassurance to get started.

Ask Jesus to help you, right where you are. Come to Him the way you are, give Him what you can, and ask Him to use it to direct you in the way you need to go. The father of the demonized boy did that. His faith wasn't perfect, but he used what he had. Rather than doing nothing, he asked Jesus, "If it is possible". But Jesus answered,"All things are possible to them that believe!" The man replied, "I believe; help Thou my unbelief!". And that was enough for Jesus to act.

All Jesus asks is that you give Him what you can. He will take it from there. As best you can, choose faith over fear. All you need is a mustard seed. It's a decision, and you have the power to make it.

It's the enemy who comes to "kill, steal and destroy". Jesus comes so that we can abundant life. You have nothing to fear from trusting Him.
 
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EPHESIANS6:10-11

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It says in the bible that our prayers are as incense to Him, so you dont need an incense burner, you just need to be on your knees, praying. :)
if i go on my knees ill never get back up 1) because am unable to 2) But once i get down there ill be praying and being thankful to Jesus
ill remain on my knees

i want to thank you all for your support and helping me to figure things out
and your prayers
 
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thank you for posting to me i kinda scared to let anyone in
scared am going to lose someone if i do
I know what you mean. I was afraid of losing people too. With every person that came along I was just waiting for them to find a reason to leave. The only way I was able to overcome that was to decide to be a friend to someone, instead of looking for someone to be mine. Now, I just try to be everyone's friend, some stay, some go, but I just focus on helping people, and that has greatly improved my mental state. I'll be praying for. I know you'll make it. You're stronger than you feel.
 
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