LOL--I will ask the same thing if you---
(Job 40:8) Wilt thou also disannul my judgment? wilt thou condemn me, that thou mayest be righteous?
God's final assessment of Job is:
(Job 42:9) So Eliphaz the Temanite and Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite went, and did according as the LORD commanded them: the LORD also accepted Job.
(Job 42:10) And the LORD turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before.
For someone who doesn't have " a dog in this fight" you seem very determined to ignore the judgment of God in regard to Job. It is His judgment that is the final word, you want to make it be your judgment. Job may have erred in some of his thinking--which may have been tantamount to saying his judgment was above God's, but when it was pointed out, he quickly repented. Satan never did. What about you?? You insist on making him fat, when the scriptures say just the opposite, now you want to make him ni better than Satan himself! He said something wrong, he repented--God accepted--you won't.
A man exalting himself above God is not consistent with a man who is perfect and upright. At some point Job fell. You could equate Job to Adam, who was blameless and perfect until iniquity was found in him.
Can't you see the picture? The book of Job is about the redemption of man. Born blameless until iniquity is found in him. Job needed a redeemer. As the NT tells us even the most righteous man cannot be his own saviour, for all his righteousness becomes filthy rags once he sins. Job needed to abandon his own righteous and put on God's righteousness. This is why we are told to put on Christ.
We see the picture of Job in Israel as Paul makes his plea for Israel in Romans 10:1-3.
Paul says his desire for Israel is that they might be saved. This was God's desire for Job.
Paul said that they have a zeal for God. Job had a zeal for God, this is why Job is called God's servant.
Paul said they were without knowledge. God said Job was without knowledge (Job 38:2).
Paul said they were going about to establish their own righteousness. Job said, (Job 27:6 My righteousness I hold fast, and will not let it go: my heart shall not reproach me so long as I live.)
God said, (Job 35:2 Think this to be right, that you said, My righteousness is more than God's?)
Paul said, ("They have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God." Romans 10:3) Salvation comes when we submit unto God. This is what the book of Job is about, Job's salvation.
God asked Job if he was going to make a covenant with Satan (Job 41:4). To understand the book of Job we merely need to look at the rest of the bible, it is all about our redemption. Job was redeemed at the end.