Will a romantic relationship/marriage have difficulty if there is not mutual physical attraction between the partners?
Is it shallow for me to not be interested in a Christian of the opposite sex who has a lot of the qualities I'm looking forand is a strong believer but I am just not physically attracted to?
thanks for your help
Hi. In order.....
a. Yes , in almost every case there will be . If there is no physical attraction which usually means that One person doesnt like the way their Partner looks due to their perception of being fat, ugly, repulsive, etc... then sex in marriage is going to wane considerably or be non existant because there will be a strong level of disrespect present. Sex in marriage is designed by God to cement a marriage by bringing people closer to together physically, emotionally, and even with spiritual benefits since the ENTIRE Person is engaging in the act including the persons Soul. It is very wise to find a Partner that comes with some level of physical attraction to you...and preferably an above average amount.
b. You can be interested for a friendship, but i wouldnt work toward marriage unless certain criteria were met on your end...and that needs to include an attractiveness . Now...what occurs many times, is, over lots of time after you get to know the other person better....the physical becomes way less important / you are able to overlook that missing quality / or, you find some physical things about the person appealing to you.
c. In rare instances, there are people who simply dont care about the physical attractiveness of a Person . If this meets the way you are ,concretely, then there wont be a problem with that issue in marriage. Just so long as you understand that according to Gods Word you have an obligation to satisfy your marriage partner sexually and vice versa .
A top notch best seller book on criteria for a successful marriage and what to look for in a prospective dating partner ...is the great book called :'Finding the Love of your Life' by Dr. Warren available on
www.amazon.com . It is so good that it should be a mandatory course in high schools and colleges so the divorce rate can be lessened and so marriages can be more successful.