OCD is destroying my faith... HELP!

[TheWorriedOne]

Someone please help I don't know what to do anymore I just keep thinking God isn't real and I can't stand it. It seems like I don't believe anymore but I just can't with these doubts and thoughts I'm spiritually exhausted I feel like I've fallen away and no matter how hard I try to come back and believe I just can't I need God to do this for me or something because I don't know wha to do I'm so confused...

 

[lilipunzel]

Seek professional help in your area. OCD is not a spiritual issue it is an issue of distorted thinking and obsessions. Go to the OC Foundation site and find a qualified therapist in your area or ABCT, association of Cognitive and behavioral therapies. They also list qualified therapists. The spiritual part of OCD is that it impacts negatively our relationships with God and others.

 

[raven1]

How is logical that OCD causes doubt God exists? I am not saying that it is not true but what proof is there that doubt God exists is caused by OCD. No test to take.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

What's bothering me is these feelings of doubt unbelief, and thoughts saying God doesn't exist it makes it so hard to believe.

 

[lilipunzel]

RAven,
you make a good point. The way professionals look at it is how much is this doubt about God affecting your life? Most people doubt that God exists at times adn that doubt is a normal part of being human. We look at the context in a persons life. Do they have a hsitory of OCD? How much time do they spend on the doubt about God. Does it cause them anxiety. There is normal anxiery about concerns in life, but people with OCD really suffer greatly secondary to the doubt. If your doubt doesnt impact you negatively then you are right, it might not be OCD.
I hope that helps,
LJ

 

[raven1]

I know people doubt but I and others have doubted for years and we can't prove it is ocd.

 

[lilipunzel]

why would it make a difference if it is or it isnt if it doesnt bother you?

 

[raven1]

It does bother me. Because I feel doubt God exists as an OCD syptom is the only forgivable type but I don't know if I believe it is an OCD syptom.

 

[lilipunzel]

What is your fear if you doubt God? That he will not love oyu? That you will not be saved?

 

[raven1]

Yup

 

[raven1]

Yup. Worried one. Do you really doubt God exists or do u know in your heart. How long has this been going on.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Well see this is the confusing part because these problems started in November. I had always had a strong faith in God but these doubts really get to me and it seems like I believe them. It scares me. Then there are brief moments where I feel close to God which feels great but it confuses me more because once it's over I don't know wgere I stand with God because I have feelings of unbelief later on. Like today really was a bad day the doubts were extremely strong and I didn't feel close to God... I'm spiritually exhausted by this and I don't know where I stand with God. I would like to have a relationship with him but the OCD confuses me and makes having a relationship with him difficult because I'm constantly scared that I don't really believe or I'll fall away and go to hell.

 

[raven1]

I am sorry. I know how it is. I never have glimpses of total belief, I am glad u do. I will pray for you every night.

 

[Christian-Catholic]

Well see this is the confusing part because these problems started in November. I had always had a strong faith in God but these doubts really get to me and it seems like I believe them. It scares me. Then there are brief moments where I feel close to God which feels great but it confuses me more because once it's over I don't know wgere I stand with God because I have feelings of unbelief later on. Like today really was a bad day the doubts were extremely strong and I didn't feel close to God... I'm spiritually exhausted by this and I don't know where I stand with God. I would like to have a relationship with him but the OCD confuses me and makes having a relationship with him difficult because I'm constantly scared that I don't really believe or I'll fall away and go to hell.

Worried one, I have been there and I still go through it sometimes. Ocd is the great confuser, and it attacks what is most precious to you. If you dont believe it just go back and look through some of my old posts.

There was a pastor once that told me "regardless of your day to day feelings that can be fickle or when you are under the attack of a disorder, God is still there, the only thing that changes are our feelings"

If you have a parents or a best friend who loves you so much that they would give their life to you, God is like this except for the fact that he loves you a trillion trillion trillion times more. Would our Lord send you to hell for something you cant control or want? No way on earth, Right now he loves you even more then most because despite what your feeling your still clinging onto him. This is true faith!!!

Even Jesus, who didnt have OCD, went through it on the cross when he said "my god, my god why have you forsaken me". You belong to God regardless of your OCD and nothing can change that.

I havent read all your posts yet, but are you seeing a therapist or are you taking any meds to help put this under a bit of control?

I have you and raven on my prayers list.

 

[Christian-Catholic]

I know people doubt but I and others have doubted for years and we can't prove it is ocd.

Raven, I have been through it for 2 years. To the person feeling it , it feels liek it really them having the doubt. This is why OCD causes fear levels to spike bigtime. It isnt called the doubting desease for no reason.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Yes I'm on meds and seeing a therapist if you would go back a few pages there was a woman named KerrySue who said wanting to believe in Jesus shows I'm saved then I started thinking things saying I didn't want to be saved is this normal? And thank you you make me sort of see my faith when I couldn't.

 

[kerrysue]

Lilipunzel, so glad you got on here to give professional advice--Raven, you are always on here and so is Worried One, and basically repeating the same questions about doubting God and fearing going to hell/not being saved. That right there shows obssession. That is not normal. If you understand GRACE and God's holiness, you will understand better that our doubts (even that God exists at all) cannot affect salvation!! An awesome, totally perfect, waaaaaay above us puny humans, God does not base his gift of Christ's death on the cross for your sins on your thoughts. You are a human with a fallen sinful nature and cannot help the impure and doubting thoughts that enter your head. God knows our frame, that we are dust!! In fact, salvation can be nothing of us at all, or it isn't FREE. It is totally of HIM!!!! That takes a huge load off your shoulders if you accept that--Even if you doubt that God exists that doesn't affect God any. It is not our belief (or our doubts either) but WHO we are believing. Many people don't believe in God but that doesn't mean God doesn't exist! But, like Lilipunzel says, before your mind can understand the spiritual you will have to get the physical stuff working right. It cannot hurt you to get the help for your brain to do its thing right--only will help you!! You need to step out now and start taking advice on here to get good help.

 

[kerrysue]

Worried One and Raven,
Definitely sorry that my saying only wanting to be saved means you're saved caused you a new thread of doubt....Now quite possibly something else I say or anyone else on here could do the same. I had that happen over and over and over again. That is a huge symptom of OCD--obsessing over some doubt and then trying to get relief by talking to someone. They would say something that would give relief in that area but mention some other strain/thread of the issue and my mind would latch onto that as my new doubt. Lilipunzel, that is a classic OCD symptom, is it not? From all the stuff I've read on it, it is a huge symptom. That is why getting on here just to try to relieve your thread of doubt is not going to work, because there will always be some other doubt created! You need to tell your therapist all these things and sounds like you need to up your meds or try a new one. I pray for you and Raven too and think perhaps Lilipunzel and her professional advice is an answer from the Lord for you both too. Take the steps now that we have all suggested!!

 

[raven1]

I have a appointment scheduled for next tues. what does it mean if I get therapy and still doubt. Someone told me doubting God exists isn't OCD it is the constantly freaking out about the fact you doubt is.

 

[lilipunzel]

Looking for reassurance is a compulsion and people who give it are unknowingly reinforcing the anxiety. Let me see if I can find some literature on this. This is a disorder of brain function. Just because the content is spiritual doesnt make it a spiritual problem. Focus on the process and what to do about it rather than content.
Hope this helps