hello,
Ive grown up in a word of faith church, and always wanted to live a life of faith.
i believed 10 years ago that God wanted me to stay single, despite my prayer for a wife. i was in my early 30s, and thought it was time for me. I cried when i received this from God. I told Him NO! but later relented, in tears. However, it could have been right back then, maybe i wasnt ready and God was saving me from divorce. Since then, i have been to bible college, stayed active in the church, serving as much as i could. I've changed and matured.
Now, I've reached a crisis point. Im still single, but I feel now for the past year that I've been ready. However, I've had so many disappointments in finding someone, and feel like God has not given me a breakthrough moment. There was no eureka moment, when God said now is the time. Mostly, I feel like Im not even getting help from God, and Im on my own. I can admit I got it wrong, but why didnt God show me? I know the Bible, I pray every day, Im spirit filled, Im even on leadership teams. I have told people that God was told me to wait when they ask. I deserve nothing, but believe! I am a child of God.
I believe that God responds to faith. Do I wait until Im 50 or 60? Isnt that defeating the object?
I dont know how to go on. I have failed, my beliefs have failed. I believed that my obedience would pay off. I have waited 10 years, and now I am faced with finding a wife with internet dating, something I thought i would never do. My problem is that i thought God would either give me a wife, or tell me clearly to get on with it, and at least help me find her.
I am faced with extreme thoughts about my future, and my faith.
Ive grown up in a word of faith church, and always wanted to live a life of faith.
i believed 10 years ago that God wanted me to stay single, despite my prayer for a wife. i was in my early 30s, and thought it was time for me. I cried when i received this from God. I told Him NO! but later relented, in tears. However, it could have been right back then, maybe i wasnt ready and God was saving me from divorce. Since then, i have been to bible college, stayed active in the church, serving as much as i could. I've changed and matured.
Now, I've reached a crisis point. Im still single, but I feel now for the past year that I've been ready. However, I've had so many disappointments in finding someone, and feel like God has not given me a breakthrough moment. There was no eureka moment, when God said now is the time. Mostly, I feel like Im not even getting help from God, and Im on my own. I can admit I got it wrong, but why didnt God show me? I know the Bible, I pray every day, Im spirit filled, Im even on leadership teams. I have told people that God was told me to wait when they ask. I deserve nothing, but believe! I am a child of God.
I believe that God responds to faith. Do I wait until Im 50 or 60? Isnt that defeating the object?
I dont know how to go on. I have failed, my beliefs have failed. I believed that my obedience would pay off. I have waited 10 years, and now I am faced with finding a wife with internet dating, something I thought i would never do. My problem is that i thought God would either give me a wife, or tell me clearly to get on with it, and at least help me find her.
I am faced with extreme thoughts about my future, and my faith.