My wife says she doesn't love me anymore

Duckybill

Well-Known Member
Jul 31, 2007
2,739
75
✟3,250.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
God can only change a repentant heart.
God can change a rebellious heart into a repentant heart. He does it quite often.

Ezekiel 36:26-27 (NKJV)
26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. 27 I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them.
 
Upvote 0

jham123

Newbie
Jul 14, 2010
177
8
✟7,883.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
^^OK, so that is true. But how does this pertain to JF??

So JF lives Ez 36:26-27 and he lives it 100%.....how will this change his wife's poor behavior? I mean, if you were to give this advice to JF's wife I would understand fully.

Is it that you think that JF is waivering due to him asking what he should do?
 
Upvote 0

Duckybill

Well-Known Member
Jul 31, 2007
2,739
75
✟3,250.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
^^OK, so that is true. But how does this pertain to JF??

So JF lives Ez 36:26-27 and he lives it 100%.....how will this change his wife's poor behavior? I mean, if you were to give this advice to JF's wife I would understand fully.

Is it that you think that JF is waivering due to him asking what he should do?
I'm simply trying to encourage everyone that God is well able to deliver what He promised. I.E.

Acts 16:31 (NKJV)
31 So they said, "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and your household."
 
Upvote 0

Autumnleaf

Legend
Jun 18, 2005
24,828
1,034
✟33,297.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
Do not chase after anyone who's not red hot for you. It never ends well and it's so much easier to make peace with rejection before your heart is stomped into the mud. Wondering why someone treated you like crap and why you let it happen is probably one of the most difficult things to get over. It can mess you up for years.

If someone walks out on you, thank them. They are making room in your life for something better.
 
Upvote 0

Jesus Freak62

Newbie
Jul 6, 2010
53
7
61
Denham Springs, LA
✟7,716.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Constitution
Do not chase after anyone who's not red hot for you. It never ends well and it's so much easier to make peace with rejection before your heart is stomped into the mud. Wondering why someone treated you like crap and why you let it happen is probably one of the most difficult things to get over. It can mess you up for years.

If someone walks out on you, thank them. They are making room in your life for something better.

I am taking that into consideration. Believe me, I am not going to put up w/ this for very long.
 
Upvote 0

Jesus Freak62

Newbie
Jul 6, 2010
53
7
61
Denham Springs, LA
✟7,716.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Constitution
I'm sorry. He is my neighbor, three houses down the street. Married w/ three children. I have not seen him yet, I have been working a stretch of nights.

My wife has certainly become more friendly towards me since I confronted her about her sending and receiving text messages from this guy every morning and every night for the month of May(the only month I have records on). We actually prayed together a couple of times, and she has intiated conversation w/ me. I told her that I would not go down the road she is traveling(watching inappropriate contentography on the TV(Batchelor), drinking alcohol,texting,facebooking,etc. She thinks I need to catch up with the world. I reaffirmed to her the road I am travelling is in obedience to the Lord as best as I can. I told her she has to choose which road she wants to go down.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

mattybartholomew

Active Member
Nov 3, 2007
143
7
40
South Beach,FL
✟342.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Republican
I told her that I would not go down the road she is traveling(watching inappropriate contentography on the TV(Batchelor), drinking alcohol,texting,facebooking,etc.

Brother, I would pray and ask God if maybe your view of "The Bachelor", is a bit legalistic? It's not inappropriate content, it's a scripted TV show.
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

jham123

Newbie
Jul 14, 2010
177
8
✟7,883.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
^^and it panders to the emotional side of women.....which I maintain is equal to visual inappropriate content for men....but alas I am alone in that view.... JF, it is good that you've called her out. Her speaking to you is an act of guilt. She knows that you know. Keep that tact, you don't have to be harsh, you can be loving and patient and pray......but no need to be harsh, she'll do what she is going to do regardless. So just pray and be there for her when she returns. Maybe she'll repent and ask for your forgiveness.
 
Upvote 0

Jesus Freak62

Newbie
Jul 6, 2010
53
7
61
Denham Springs, LA
✟7,716.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Constitution
Thanks jham123! I was going to show the cellphone records to my neighbor(the texter) but I'll have to get a new copy since my wife shredded them. I tried to call AT&T for them today, but she put a lock on the account yesterday. No problem, I will be going to the AT&T store tomorrow for them. They have told me they can unlock the account if I am there in person.

Meanwhile, I am working on showing love,joy,peace,patience,kindness,gentleness, and self-control to her and my family.
 
Upvote 0

jham123

Newbie
Jul 14, 2010
177
8
✟7,883.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
^^I dunno......a single man fornicating with 27 different women that he has never met before..... I mean, you are looking for the traditional sense of inappropriate content.....but lets not parse words or meanings. We all know what those shows are about and who they are pandering to.
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Jesus Freak62

Newbie
Jul 6, 2010
53
7
61
Denham Springs, LA
✟7,716.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Constitution
I talked w/ my neighbor last night about the texting. He thanked me for bringing it to his attention. He never really gave it a thought about how often they were texting. He also said he told his wife. I somehow believe him. He said he checked his texting records, and never realized he had 5,200 texts in one month. He gave me info. about what the texting was about, it basically sounded like my wife was bored, and pestered him about my son's baseball. He assured me that he was not going to respond to her texts, but would communicate to the both of us through emails.

My wife is chatty.........very chatty! And I think what I am learning from this is to allow her to talk to me more and for me to listen more. You know we guys always want to "fix" things, when our wives just want us to listen. She also has become aware that she needs to put her phone away when we are alone, and try to spend some quality time w/ me.

The introduction of cell phones has always bothered me. While they can serve a worthy purpose, they can also become an addiction. I use a Tracfone, and purchase minute cards. I never use all of my minutes, so they just roll over. My monthly bill is less than $10. In my opinion, the amount people spend on cell phones is poor stewardship.

She is still hurt about my past comments about her weight issues. I could really use some help there. I feel like this is a subject that I cannot touch......I damned if I do and I damned if I don't sot of thing. She does desire to lose weight. Please tell me how I can encourage her w/o hurting her. She says I do nothing to encourage her. I know the things she needs to do, but she has been unwilling to do them.

Thanks for the prayers!
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

jham123

Newbie
Jul 14, 2010
177
8
✟7,883.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
5200 test in a month to another man??............JF, please be careful........About her weight issue, also, this is going to be tricky indeed. You need to make sure that you aren't allowing her to make her problem your problem. She has the weight problem, you do not. Her attempts to tell you that you aren't encouraging her is a way of offloading the problem onto you and to make her situation your fault...........You can't openly say that due to it causing WWIII in your house. In the back of your mind however, be vigilant that this is what she is trying to do and gently and lovingly do not allow it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Autumnleaf
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

jham123

Newbie
Jul 14, 2010
177
8
✟7,883.00
Faith
Charismatic
Marital Status
Married
His total texts for the month was 5,200. These were not all to my wife.

The number of text between him and your wife is irrelevant to the point in whole.

The fact that there are late night ones and more that just a few...that is enough for me to red flag the activity.

Be careful JF, and I'd be really looking into "finding out" just what is really going on here.
 
Upvote 0