I hate pills as well, and I personally don't want to take them unless it is a last resort. I can tell you there are times that I struggle as well, but the important thing for me is taking my mind off my depression and putting it on other things, especially things of the Lord.
The Lord tells me He won't give me more than I can handle, and I trust Him for that.
The Lord tells me He won't leave me or forsake me, so I cling to Him with all that I have.
The Lord tells me He will give me a future and a hope, and I look to the future and the hope.
Does it help me get past the feeling of wanting to go home with Him? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. But despite it all, I continue to trust in the Lord with all my heart, and try not to lean on my own understanding. I try to acknowledge Him in all my ways, and let Him direct my paths. At times I get tired, holding on to the Lord, but He never lets me go.
This was an encouragement to me yesterday, when I was struggling.
Exodus 17:11-13 NIV
11 As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. 12 When Moses' hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up--one on one side, one on the other--so that his hands remained steady till sunset. 13 So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.
When you lack strength, let others hold up your hands in prayer. Today, on my lunch break, I called a Brother and prayed with him, asking him to lift up my hands, so to speak. It really did help me.