I feel so sad right now, or depressed. For some part it's general sadness, but also feeling condemned and hopeless or worrying that I could be rejected by God. The fear that I could be unsaved, nonbelieving, the goats on the left or a foolish virgin. The fear of the Hebrews passages about ones falling away unable to be restored to repentance or wilful sin, and a passage about having a seared conscious. I have had so many evil thoughts and sometimes it seems like I'll say/whisper things for no good reason I worry about being judged for. Lately I've thought how can my thoughts get this dark? Be so horrible towards God? I also feel very alone, I feel kind of isolated offline - like I don't have many friends in general but especially I feel like I need more friends who can support me in the faith. Also thinking about some other things, like what do I do with my life/time? i feel alone and scared and sad.
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I just wanted to share something my fiance' came up with. She is a jewelry designer and has a shop with her daughter. They asked if I had an outlet for some of their items and I told them I would share it with everyone here at CF. So I started them an Etsy Shop account to showcase what they have done. And this is the first items! Check it out and let me know what you think!
Thanks so much! - Rex
Click here to see it!
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