Often, the topic of inter-faith dating comes up in Christian conversation. It is far from an uncommon topic. People are always curious to know if they "can" date a non-believer or a believer of a different faith, and Christians (mostly mainline and conservative Christians) are always more than happy to tell them "how it is," so to speak. Well, now a Progressive is going to get a word in edgewise, so sit down and have a listen...
The command not to marry unbelievers or non-Christians ("be yoked together with" / ie: Unequally Yoked) was a cultural reference in the Bible during a time when the survival of Christianity was still at risk. In order to protect the newly developing faith, it was better for Christians to marry Christians and produce Christian children who would then go on to do the same, to ensure the survival of the religion. It made sense at the time.
For reference, the passage reads as follows:
When the faith was still fragile, it was feared that a non-believer could more easily sway a believer from his or her path in Christ/God. Perhaps a non-Christian partner [who, at the time, was most likely someone who worshiped an idol of some kind, a Pagan faith of the day if you will] would persuade that individual back to the past forms of idol-worship, which was recent past at the time. And perhaps they were correct, considering that early Christian belief was still under heavy persecution for years to come.
When the past is fresh in your mind, the ability to fall back into old "habits" as it were would be far more likely. However, today we have far separated ourselves from that particular history of idol-worship and Pagan religion. While it's true that Paganism exists in today's world, it really isn't the "immediate history of yesterday" that it was in early Christian days. Today, Paganism is a choice made by [often young] people later in life, with no persuasion from parental and/or marital figures at all. Christianity is no longer "fighting for independence from" Paganism.
In today's day and age, marrying non-believers isn't nearly as dicey. People are much more independent in and of themselves, and are not so easily swayed to one persuasion or another (be it religious or not) simply by their chosen partner. Also, Christianity is wide-spread in the modern day and it's survival no longer depends solely upon your personal ability to marry a Christian and produce Christian children, because frankly your future children may or may not grow up to believe regardless., or if raised with no belief at all could end up being believers (of which I am a prime example).
It wasn't like that a couple thousand years ago though. Remember that cultural references throughout scripture are common and do not always apply directly to society today.
I myself married an Agnostic, and we are extremely happy together. A successful blending of different belief-sets of any kind (religious or otherwise) is almost completely hinged on a high level of mutual respect. The fact is, if you can grow to respect each other's religions.. you will be just fine. However.. I do have a warning for anyone who may be contemplating inter-faith dating as a Christian or with a Christian:
If you are going to try to convert the other individual? If you cannot accept that individual as they are in his or her current ways for the rest of his or her natural life? If the inter-faith gap will go on to cause fights and trauma and confusion and strife? Please... do the world a favor, do your partner a favor, do your future children a favor and do not date that individual. You need someone in your own faith if you are poised to spend a lifetime beating up that other party for his or her faith, or beating them over the head with your faith. In a situation like that, you are better off never starting the process of dating right from the start.
So I will admit in conclusion: Interfaith dating is not for everyone (whether Christianity is involved or not); however, it is perfectly reasonable for two open-minded, mutually-respectful people to have an inter-faith relationship successfully and live a long, happy life together.
The command not to marry unbelievers or non-Christians ("be yoked together with" / ie: Unequally Yoked) was a cultural reference in the Bible during a time when the survival of Christianity was still at risk. In order to protect the newly developing faith, it was better for Christians to marry Christians and produce Christian children who would then go on to do the same, to ensure the survival of the religion. It made sense at the time.
For reference, the passage reads as follows:
2 Corinthians 6:14-16: Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."
When the faith was still fragile, it was feared that a non-believer could more easily sway a believer from his or her path in Christ/God. Perhaps a non-Christian partner [who, at the time, was most likely someone who worshiped an idol of some kind, a Pagan faith of the day if you will] would persuade that individual back to the past forms of idol-worship, which was recent past at the time. And perhaps they were correct, considering that early Christian belief was still under heavy persecution for years to come.
When the past is fresh in your mind, the ability to fall back into old "habits" as it were would be far more likely. However, today we have far separated ourselves from that particular history of idol-worship and Pagan religion. While it's true that Paganism exists in today's world, it really isn't the "immediate history of yesterday" that it was in early Christian days. Today, Paganism is a choice made by [often young] people later in life, with no persuasion from parental and/or marital figures at all. Christianity is no longer "fighting for independence from" Paganism.
In today's day and age, marrying non-believers isn't nearly as dicey. People are much more independent in and of themselves, and are not so easily swayed to one persuasion or another (be it religious or not) simply by their chosen partner. Also, Christianity is wide-spread in the modern day and it's survival no longer depends solely upon your personal ability to marry a Christian and produce Christian children, because frankly your future children may or may not grow up to believe regardless., or if raised with no belief at all could end up being believers (of which I am a prime example).
It wasn't like that a couple thousand years ago though. Remember that cultural references throughout scripture are common and do not always apply directly to society today.
I myself married an Agnostic, and we are extremely happy together. A successful blending of different belief-sets of any kind (religious or otherwise) is almost completely hinged on a high level of mutual respect. The fact is, if you can grow to respect each other's religions.. you will be just fine. However.. I do have a warning for anyone who may be contemplating inter-faith dating as a Christian or with a Christian:
If you are going to try to convert the other individual? If you cannot accept that individual as they are in his or her current ways for the rest of his or her natural life? If the inter-faith gap will go on to cause fights and trauma and confusion and strife? Please... do the world a favor, do your partner a favor, do your future children a favor and do not date that individual. You need someone in your own faith if you are poised to spend a lifetime beating up that other party for his or her faith, or beating them over the head with your faith. In a situation like that, you are better off never starting the process of dating right from the start.
So I will admit in conclusion: Interfaith dating is not for everyone (whether Christianity is involved or not); however, it is perfectly reasonable for two open-minded, mutually-respectful people to have an inter-faith relationship successfully and live a long, happy life together.
