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Playing on the wild side

Im playing on the wrong side of the street with the wrong people. Im attracting the wrong people. They think Im a vampire like they are when Im not!
Is it there fault or mine. I find myself around the people I need to grow! However, Im growing in a none intimate way. When I attempt to take an intimate interest I get hurt. I usually wait to see if things are safe. I find out the person is a player. Why did I not see this in the first place. Why would I allow this to happen.

The first chance I get to finally decide to make a move and no one is available to make a move with. They are taken. Then I realize they have always been taken and they never took me seriously! they secretly were with someone else the whole time. I was played the whole time.

Im tired and Im not sure where to go or what to do or who to be around or who to trust.

I have to keep going and trust God. Im not sure what else to do! or where else to go!

keep preying and trusting God!

Im being treated like a fool! I need safe places to go! Im tired of all of this!

I guess I have to be broken into Gods care and learn to trust God that I snap out of it and make the moves I need to make.

I feel hurt and let down. Nothing new!

I will probably go through with the speaker meeting. I want to see how I act and react. And I suppose it does not matter what these people think of me! they don't count anyway. I can see what I mean to them; nothing!

Im constantly having to wake up to a world that does not want me. Im not sure where Im left to go, or what Im suppose to do! or where!

I guess I have to keep working with God until I can find the right people and places and things. I do not know who or what that is!