James 1:2-4 (NIV)
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
My previous blog entires were written back in April of last year. It has been a little over a year since those were written, and, as some already know, it has been a year of trials. To be honest, it isn't always easy considering these trials as "pure joy" but I do continue to persevere, by the strength of the Lord.
The health problems and doctor visits for Michelle had continued. At times, there didn't often seem like there was an end in sight. Last summer, she had her license taken away because her medications made her unsafe to drive. She was always tired and couldn't remember anything. That lasted the entire summer before they finally changed her medications so she wouldn't have that issue. Even now, she doesn't remember anything from that time.
The health issues became worse around Thanksgiving, when she started having trouble with nausea and vomiting again. This landed her in the hospital on a regular basis, and by the beginning of this year, she was going to the hospital two and sometimes three times every week. I was actually getting very concerned that part of the problem was the narcotic pain medication.
This lasted the first couple of months of 2008, and then she started improving. At least we thought she was improving. True, she wasn't going to the hospital quite as much, but she was still having issues with her pain and her nausea. Then she discovered that her thyroid cancer had returned, but it was too minuscule to be located at this time. So, that brought about getting an oncologist for a second opinion as well.
This brings us up to a week ago. The oncologist confirmed that she has cancer and ran a CT scan of her lungs and liver, as that is two possible locations for the cancer. Both came back negative, confirming the thought that the cancer was too small to be found. Unfortunately, Michelle has grown increasingly tired, and has been having more difficulty breathing. A couple doctors have told her it is the cancer causing this, so Michelle is trying to get a PET scan approved and scheduled, so they can try to find the problem and take care of it.
Unfortunately, since Sunday, Michelle has been in the ER almost every day. Whether it is chest pains, difficulty breathing, nausea, vomiting blood, or excessive fatigue, there really hasn't been a break.
Of course, Michelle's health hasn't been the only area of perseverance for us. My job has been in flux for a while. I've been in transition between QA (Software testing) and development all of last year. I've been wanting to get into development for a long time, and my manager was helping to bring that about.
Late last year, though, the "mortgage bubble" popped in the United States. This threw me into a bit of uncertainty as our company deals exclusively with software for the mortgage industry. I wondered how this would affect the company. It was a concern, but not one I was worried about.
In January, during my annual review, my manager asked me about moving from the Monterey office up to the San Jose office on a permanent basis. I was currently going up there once or twice a week, and I was reimbursed for my travel (it was 70 miles one way). The move would cause me to lose that reimbursement, which I couldn't afford. She understood, and that was the last I had heard of it for a while.
About two months ago, another bomb was dropped at my work. My manager had put in her two week notice, moving to another company. This really left me in a state of flux. I was in between offices, and there was talk of closing the Monterey office, and I was in between positions. With that, and Michelle's health, I was under a great deal of stress and really didn't know what to do.
Things at my work continued forward, and a month ago, I was forced to move up to the San Jose office. Fortunately, my company provided me a company car and gas card to use to compensate the travel. I'm still in between positions, but my position is still secure.
Again, on the personal front, around the time of the uncertainty at work, Michelle and I were forced to file bankruptcy. There were a lot of factors that brought this about, and it was one I had tried to find every possible way to avoid. In the end, though, we decided to file Chapter 13, which restructures our debt and we pay a fixed amount every month for four or five years (I forget which) which gets divided among the creditors at the court agreed upon amount. That is something that we are still in the middle of.
So, this past year has been, and continues to be, a very stressful time. Michelle's health issues have prevented us from going to church on Sunday mornings since the beginning of the year. Admittedly, there have been a few Sundays where the fault was my own, but regardless, the lack of fellowship has been difficult at times. Despite all this, though, I still cling to the Lord. I persevere because I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I don't know how long the tunnel is, I just know that God is guiding us through it. I just continue to trust Him, and try not to stress too much.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
My previous blog entires were written back in April of last year. It has been a little over a year since those were written, and, as some already know, it has been a year of trials. To be honest, it isn't always easy considering these trials as "pure joy" but I do continue to persevere, by the strength of the Lord.
The health problems and doctor visits for Michelle had continued. At times, there didn't often seem like there was an end in sight. Last summer, she had her license taken away because her medications made her unsafe to drive. She was always tired and couldn't remember anything. That lasted the entire summer before they finally changed her medications so she wouldn't have that issue. Even now, she doesn't remember anything from that time.
The health issues became worse around Thanksgiving, when she started having trouble with nausea and vomiting again. This landed her in the hospital on a regular basis, and by the beginning of this year, she was going to the hospital two and sometimes three times every week. I was actually getting very concerned that part of the problem was the narcotic pain medication.
This lasted the first couple of months of 2008, and then she started improving. At least we thought she was improving. True, she wasn't going to the hospital quite as much, but she was still having issues with her pain and her nausea. Then she discovered that her thyroid cancer had returned, but it was too minuscule to be located at this time. So, that brought about getting an oncologist for a second opinion as well.
This brings us up to a week ago. The oncologist confirmed that she has cancer and ran a CT scan of her lungs and liver, as that is two possible locations for the cancer. Both came back negative, confirming the thought that the cancer was too small to be found. Unfortunately, Michelle has grown increasingly tired, and has been having more difficulty breathing. A couple doctors have told her it is the cancer causing this, so Michelle is trying to get a PET scan approved and scheduled, so they can try to find the problem and take care of it.
Unfortunately, since Sunday, Michelle has been in the ER almost every day. Whether it is chest pains, difficulty breathing, nausea, vomiting blood, or excessive fatigue, there really hasn't been a break.
Of course, Michelle's health hasn't been the only area of perseverance for us. My job has been in flux for a while. I've been in transition between QA (Software testing) and development all of last year. I've been wanting to get into development for a long time, and my manager was helping to bring that about.
Late last year, though, the "mortgage bubble" popped in the United States. This threw me into a bit of uncertainty as our company deals exclusively with software for the mortgage industry. I wondered how this would affect the company. It was a concern, but not one I was worried about.
In January, during my annual review, my manager asked me about moving from the Monterey office up to the San Jose office on a permanent basis. I was currently going up there once or twice a week, and I was reimbursed for my travel (it was 70 miles one way). The move would cause me to lose that reimbursement, which I couldn't afford. She understood, and that was the last I had heard of it for a while.
About two months ago, another bomb was dropped at my work. My manager had put in her two week notice, moving to another company. This really left me in a state of flux. I was in between offices, and there was talk of closing the Monterey office, and I was in between positions. With that, and Michelle's health, I was under a great deal of stress and really didn't know what to do.
Things at my work continued forward, and a month ago, I was forced to move up to the San Jose office. Fortunately, my company provided me a company car and gas card to use to compensate the travel. I'm still in between positions, but my position is still secure.
Again, on the personal front, around the time of the uncertainty at work, Michelle and I were forced to file bankruptcy. There were a lot of factors that brought this about, and it was one I had tried to find every possible way to avoid. In the end, though, we decided to file Chapter 13, which restructures our debt and we pay a fixed amount every month for four or five years (I forget which) which gets divided among the creditors at the court agreed upon amount. That is something that we are still in the middle of.
So, this past year has been, and continues to be, a very stressful time. Michelle's health issues have prevented us from going to church on Sunday mornings since the beginning of the year. Admittedly, there have been a few Sundays where the fault was my own, but regardless, the lack of fellowship has been difficult at times. Despite all this, though, I still cling to the Lord. I persevere because I know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I don't know how long the tunnel is, I just know that God is guiding us through it. I just continue to trust Him, and try not to stress too much.