Im lonely: Im doing better.
I must trust God.
Its funny how people judge. I have people that like me, hate me, think they are better then me.! None of them has a clue who they are talking to!
Its arrogant to think I know someone because I make up stuff about them. Or, because they don't tell me the deeper stuff about themselves. All anyone has to do is ask. They never do! that would give way to honer and respect!
It is lonely! I have to remember to remain on my quest...
I am studying approach tapes and how to talk to people! that I can learn to converse again with people.
People can be rude, think they have higher status, and think Im a little fish in a little pond!
At a deeper level, Im slowly getting better.
I do get zapped by people! They want to put me in my place!
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I need a deeper relationship with God. I really do!
I must trust God! he's brought me this far...
Society is a an F;n Zoo! and that seems to be all that it is!
Strip everything away from people and what do you have; a tribe of zoo animals.. nothing more!
I choose to be a zoo animal that is awake!
----
It does get lonely! And Im not happy! Im afraid of happiness or the pursuit of it. I would not even know how to approach such an endeavor. I tried when I was young! I was not successful.
I haven't thought about it! Ive had no success with happiness. Ive been treated so horribly by people! they have had no interest in me! and now Im suppose to think something positive can happen; I can get my arms bit off! That can happen... However, that is not going to stop me! I guess I can trust God on this!
Trusting God on the outside things, like making friends.. Man, this is really hard! Yet, its the direction Im Going. So many people are controlling and judging! and think they are superior!
I suppose I feel the same way. However, I feel like Im trying to defend myself all the time!
Im actually a really nice sensitive person in a hostile world.
Ive been ripped apart out here in this world from every angle and direction; and many Godless people! and many Godless people acting like they are God filled people! They are only filled with themselves. They have contempt for honest people! I hate them for it!
I suppose I have to work on my hate!
The idea of happiness is an interesting one! I will pray about what that means.
happiness is happenings.. so, what does that mean! being apart of things that are happening..
I will pray about this. Im infuriated that I have not been able to be part of my own life!
I will pray! I believe if Im around the right people, things could be different. The right people are people of a more sensitive nature; not these judgmental freaks out here in LA LA land.
I must trust God.
Its funny how people judge. I have people that like me, hate me, think they are better then me.! None of them has a clue who they are talking to!
Its arrogant to think I know someone because I make up stuff about them. Or, because they don't tell me the deeper stuff about themselves. All anyone has to do is ask. They never do! that would give way to honer and respect!
It is lonely! I have to remember to remain on my quest...
I am studying approach tapes and how to talk to people! that I can learn to converse again with people.
People can be rude, think they have higher status, and think Im a little fish in a little pond!
At a deeper level, Im slowly getting better.
I do get zapped by people! They want to put me in my place!
----------------------
I need a deeper relationship with God. I really do!
I must trust God! he's brought me this far...
Society is a an F;n Zoo! and that seems to be all that it is!
Strip everything away from people and what do you have; a tribe of zoo animals.. nothing more!
I choose to be a zoo animal that is awake!
----
It does get lonely! And Im not happy! Im afraid of happiness or the pursuit of it. I would not even know how to approach such an endeavor. I tried when I was young! I was not successful.
I haven't thought about it! Ive had no success with happiness. Ive been treated so horribly by people! they have had no interest in me! and now Im suppose to think something positive can happen; I can get my arms bit off! That can happen... However, that is not going to stop me! I guess I can trust God on this!
Trusting God on the outside things, like making friends.. Man, this is really hard! Yet, its the direction Im Going. So many people are controlling and judging! and think they are superior!
I suppose I feel the same way. However, I feel like Im trying to defend myself all the time!
Im actually a really nice sensitive person in a hostile world.
Ive been ripped apart out here in this world from every angle and direction; and many Godless people! and many Godless people acting like they are God filled people! They are only filled with themselves. They have contempt for honest people! I hate them for it!
I suppose I have to work on my hate!
The idea of happiness is an interesting one! I will pray about what that means.
happiness is happenings.. so, what does that mean! being apart of things that are happening..
I will pray about this. Im infuriated that I have not been able to be part of my own life!
I will pray! I believe if Im around the right people, things could be different. The right people are people of a more sensitive nature; not these judgmental freaks out here in LA LA land.