Well, I'm trying to be more optimistic again. The good voice in my head says that I have a choice who I believe in, Jesus, or the devil. I don't trust the good voice, but I do believe God has blessed me. I have a lot of blessings in my life. I have a nice family and I have nice belongings. The good voice says that I have something better than all the money in the world, and that is salvation. I have a hard time trusting the good voice, though. The good voice has laughed at me and insulted me when I was really down before, so I'm not sure if I should believe him. I think he is right though about one thing: I have to choose who to believe in.
I keep believing that everyone hates me, though. I keep believing that I'm a really horrible person. I hope God isn't angry at me for believing these things. I don't want him to curse me for being really pessimistic.
I hope I don't go to hell this Christmas. I hope I'm wrong about everything. I keep putting together all the clues and I keep believing all these awful things. I feel like I've been given signs and miracles so that I would know that I'm going to hell and there is nothing I can do about it. But I hope that I am wrong. Maybe I just need to be more optimistic. Everyone I've talked to says "If you believe in Jesus, you get to go to Heaven." Well, I do believe in Jesus, so I hope that is where I will go. I've been told that you can't lose your salvation. I'm not sure if this is true. I know we are supposed to repent if we believe. I've been trying to repent. I've been listening to the good voice and doing what he tells me to do. I've been trying my hardest to stop sinning.
Anyway, thank you to all the nice people on these forums who have tried to help me. If I don't go to hell this Christmas then I will probably be more optimistic. If my beliefs prove to be wrong, then I will have to believe something else other than that I'm going to hell. I keep predicting it will happen and it keeps not happening, so someday I will have to give up my beliefs. If you read this, please pray for me that God will have mercy on me. I'm really afraid that I'm going to hell this Christmas because of the signs I've been given.
Thank you,
SnowTiger
I keep believing that everyone hates me, though. I keep believing that I'm a really horrible person. I hope God isn't angry at me for believing these things. I don't want him to curse me for being really pessimistic.
I hope I don't go to hell this Christmas. I hope I'm wrong about everything. I keep putting together all the clues and I keep believing all these awful things. I feel like I've been given signs and miracles so that I would know that I'm going to hell and there is nothing I can do about it. But I hope that I am wrong. Maybe I just need to be more optimistic. Everyone I've talked to says "If you believe in Jesus, you get to go to Heaven." Well, I do believe in Jesus, so I hope that is where I will go. I've been told that you can't lose your salvation. I'm not sure if this is true. I know we are supposed to repent if we believe. I've been trying to repent. I've been listening to the good voice and doing what he tells me to do. I've been trying my hardest to stop sinning.
Anyway, thank you to all the nice people on these forums who have tried to help me. If I don't go to hell this Christmas then I will probably be more optimistic. If my beliefs prove to be wrong, then I will have to believe something else other than that I'm going to hell. I keep predicting it will happen and it keeps not happening, so someday I will have to give up my beliefs. If you read this, please pray for me that God will have mercy on me. I'm really afraid that I'm going to hell this Christmas because of the signs I've been given.
Thank you,
SnowTiger
