A though occured to me remembering the opening to the Lord of the Rings.
Gandalf: So you mean to go through with you plan (to disappear) then?
Bilbo: Yes, yes! The affects(?) are all in order.
Gandalf: Frodo (Bilbo's orphan nephew/cousin(?) he raised) suspects something.
Bilbo: Of course he does! He's a Baggins, not some block-headed Bracegirdle from Hardbottle(?).
....
Bilbo: He'd probably come with me if I asked him to, but I think in his heart Frodo's still in love with the Shire (where the hobbits live).
I wonder if I am like that. Hobbits have close families and Frodo would likely follow Bilbo from dedication but his heart would be in the Shire, where Frodo has always lived rather than Rivendell (where some elves live) which has people Frodo and Sam (gardener best friend) are fascinated by or the Misty Mountain (dwarves reclaimed in the Hobbit pre-LOTR) where a dragon had been and Thorin's (prince dwarf, died in the battle of the five armies pre-LOTR) company Bilbo had gone on his legendary adventure (Frodo says that he always liked to pretend/imagine he was off somewhere on one of Bilbo's adventures when he was younger) with. So I wonder if I may try to do things and try to be saved for some unexplainable reason (dedication to what I learned and understood the truth to be as a child?) but my heart is in its "Shire" of comfort and self-seeking.
I've been telling myself, just a few more days, then America. But I have to keep going in America too. It really wears me down sometimes.
Gandalf: So you mean to go through with you plan (to disappear) then?
Bilbo: Yes, yes! The affects(?) are all in order.
Gandalf: Frodo (Bilbo's orphan nephew/cousin(?) he raised) suspects something.
Bilbo: Of course he does! He's a Baggins, not some block-headed Bracegirdle from Hardbottle(?).
....
Bilbo: He'd probably come with me if I asked him to, but I think in his heart Frodo's still in love with the Shire (where the hobbits live).
I wonder if I am like that. Hobbits have close families and Frodo would likely follow Bilbo from dedication but his heart would be in the Shire, where Frodo has always lived rather than Rivendell (where some elves live) which has people Frodo and Sam (gardener best friend) are fascinated by or the Misty Mountain (dwarves reclaimed in the Hobbit pre-LOTR) where a dragon had been and Thorin's (prince dwarf, died in the battle of the five armies pre-LOTR) company Bilbo had gone on his legendary adventure (Frodo says that he always liked to pretend/imagine he was off somewhere on one of Bilbo's adventures when he was younger) with. So I wonder if I may try to do things and try to be saved for some unexplainable reason (dedication to what I learned and understood the truth to be as a child?) but my heart is in its "Shire" of comfort and self-seeking.
I've been telling myself, just a few more days, then America. But I have to keep going in America too. It really wears me down sometimes.
