Jesus, my Lord, You are everything to me,
Please use me to set the captives free,
To preach the Gospel to the poor,
To let them know You are our Savior.
I want to live my life for You,
Serving You in everything I do,
Lord, be the hero in my story,
Let my life be to Your Glory!
I have persevered through so much. Got pulled me out of the fire, He was with me in the floods. He used that fire to refine me and He used the floods to teach me how to walk on water. I'm in awe of everything He does, like a child I just stare at it in amazement!
God has been encouraging me so much lately, letting me know that He is going to really use me, for every good work in Christ. Nothing is impossible if you believe!
Today I was at work, and I saw two Mormons. I felt so sorry for them, because they both looked completely dead in the eyes, and they aren't seeing the true Christ or the true Gospel, and I want to help them. Then on my way home, I saw two other Mormons, and I prayed for them. Then I felt in my spirit how God is going to use me to help them in the future if I only trust Him and keep praying, keep learning, keep allowing Him to lead me. And I just had this sensation of someone truly devoted to Christ preaching to them, knowing exactly what to say, because it was given to them by the Lord in that moment. And I felt wow, that's awesome! Then God made me understand that's what I am going to do.
And moments like that nearly make me fall over, I'm not kidding. It completely overwhelms me. I can barely believe it. There are so many feelings involved. Fear and intimidation, but amazement, eagerness, love, the feeling of just being in God's presence, held in perfect peace! And all my pride just washes away, because I know it's about Him and not about me. It feels so good!
I have only really had the chance to really talk about Jesus on a deeper level to a handful of people, but there has been times where God has wowed me after I have prayed for Him to use me, either by giving me the right words to say or by a small or big miracle. I am expecting Him to do these things for us, for all of us that love Him and live for the Gospel, all to His Glory, but at the same time, I keep struggling with so much condemnation, hearing how God cannot use me, how I am such a clumsy mess I can't talk to people, and I'm back to feeling worthless. I feel how I'm still in a prison that other so-called Christians put me in last year, constantly getting in the way of God's work in me, pushing me down, making me doubt and stay trapped in fear.
I am not going to listen to those lies any longer. God is my Father, I have chosen to live for Christ, in Christ, to give up everything for Him, and He is a God that honors that commitment. And I know Him, and I know His Word, and I am being led by His Spirit! So nothing will stop Him from moving me forward!
And then all of the lies when people speak "God doesn't do things like that!"
Well, I have read about those things in His own Word, which is truth, and I have seen Him do them.
The opposition I have met is only fueling me to fight harder, and God has used it to make me more steadfast in faith, even though I crumbled in the past. Because God was still there, still faithful, still the same as He has always been, still loving me completely like the Wonderful Father that He is. And He says to me "nothing has changed". Every time I come back from falling to the ground, either from sin, or unbelief, or having been struck by a fiery dart, it's what He always reminds me of. He doesn't change, and He will always stay faithful to me. And He will always use everything that was meant for evil for my good.
I am going to bring Christ to the world, and I am going to let the unbelievers see His light through me, and make His Name known again. Three years of constant trials, and now it is time to see God bring forth a lot of fruit from me, because that is His will, and His will be done! In Jesus' name, Amen!
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