How many things have been happening in these last months. I know You, Lord. I know You enough to understand that I have just to trust You. I should not be shaken by this storm. My husband's illness, the fact that doctors don't know what is wrong with him, the uncertainties such as FMLA and disability insurance, the lack of humanity of his bosses at work, the fact that he is unable to tie his shoes or getting up from bed and I am here 8,000 kms far from him......our visa in a limbo, no news, no certainties.
In this thunderstorm I feel peaceful but I still feel confusion. I know You will deliver us, but please Lord, remember that we are human. Not knowing "when" and sometimes wondering "if" is so confusing and hurtful. I know, I do know You will deliver us. But I do need a sign. Even if You sent me many signs already. You know what I mean. You already did. But I still need them. I need You every day. Reassure me, Lord. Reassure me that, once again , You will draw a shining rainbow out from this darkness. You will transform all of this in pure joy. Give me more answers. Tell me why all of this is happening. Let me understand a little bit. Shorten these days in Your mercy, Lord. I am weak. No, this is not true. You made me strong. You made me become VERY strong. But a strong person is simply a fearful person forced to go on. I always go on with You. There have been trials in the past, and so many answers. But now, I ask You blodly, again, for a miracle. I expect Your kindness, again. I need You. We both do. Our kids do. All of us need You.
I know I should keep these things in the silence of my soul and I should speak, there, with You only. But I am human, Lord.
I need You, Lord. Don't be late! Have mercy!
In this thunderstorm I feel peaceful but I still feel confusion. I know You will deliver us, but please Lord, remember that we are human. Not knowing "when" and sometimes wondering "if" is so confusing and hurtful. I know, I do know You will deliver us. But I do need a sign. Even if You sent me many signs already. You know what I mean. You already did. But I still need them. I need You every day. Reassure me, Lord. Reassure me that, once again , You will draw a shining rainbow out from this darkness. You will transform all of this in pure joy. Give me more answers. Tell me why all of this is happening. Let me understand a little bit. Shorten these days in Your mercy, Lord. I am weak. No, this is not true. You made me strong. You made me become VERY strong. But a strong person is simply a fearful person forced to go on. I always go on with You. There have been trials in the past, and so many answers. But now, I ask You blodly, again, for a miracle. I expect Your kindness, again. I need You. We both do. Our kids do. All of us need You.
I know I should keep these things in the silence of my soul and I should speak, there, with You only. But I am human, Lord.
I need You, Lord. Don't be late! Have mercy!
