I'll never forget the day a strange new device came into my life. I had just woke up and heard my cousins laughing and chatting about something. "Jump" one of them said, "kill that guy. Don't fall in the pit". I could only wonder what they were talking about in the next room as I quickly got up and got dressed. As I entered the room, I was curious by what I saw. They were all in front of the TV. One of them was holding a small grey pad and pushing buttons.. On the screen was a little red guy running around jumping over green pipes and smashing monsters. As I observed the one holding the device, I noticed that he was controlling the guy in the TV. The character retracted to every button in a split second. I was amazed. I couldn't wait to get a turn playing this strange new game and when I finally did, I was instantly hooked. That moment changed my life forever.
For the first 2 decades after that, I was a big fan of the Mario series. I had all the titles up until Mario 64. After that, when the PlayStation came out with the Duel Shock, I abandoned Nintendo forever. But during my run, I got used to the concept of getting a second, third, forth and even ninety ninth chance of trying to complete those games. This was one reason why I loved the series so much. Unlike other games, where you get a few lives here and there, Mario Brothers allowed you to collect up to 99 lives. That meant you could keep on playing and no matter how much you messed up, you always had another chance to try again. I was no good at doing the trick to get 99 lives but my cousin was expert at it. So I would have him get the lives for me. After that, I would screw around and experiment with the game. I'd try things that I normally wouldn't dare to do if I only had one life. Sometimes I wouldn't even try to beat the game because I was having so much fun just horsing around. What did it matter? I had 99 lives. I felt immortal. What a great time to be alive.
Around the same time, I was indoctrinated into the Christian faith. When they taught me the concept of eternal life, my underdeveloped mind related it to what I knew best, videogames. This meant that I could do whatever I wanted in this life because I had 99 more in the next life to come. At least, that's how I interpreted it. Knowing that Jesus gave his only life so that I could live forever was like my cousin doing all the work getting 99 1-ups then handing the controller to me and saying "have at it".
As a kid, I thought eternity in heaven rendered this life meaningless. But I never told anybody. In my mind, there was no question about it. I was going to live forever and my time on this Earth was not even a fraction of that infinite amount of time. I learned in math that no part of infinity could be reduced to a fraction and since this was my way of thinking, I easily applied it to the biblical doctrine of eternal life.
So naturally, I screwed myself over because of this cognitive distortion. I did what I wanted. I sinned, asked for forgiveness, then sinned some more. I failed in school because I thought the rapture would happen before I graduated. I smoked and did drugs because I thought God would heal me if I got sick. I went to jail, told God I was sorry and asked him to get me out, then did more crime and went to jail again and again. This was life. It was meant to be wasted. None of it mattered. I had 99 lives and I wasted them all.
Then one day reality hit me. I realized that I had used up all my lives and was down to my last one. If I screwed this one up, there would be no more chances. What I mean by this is that I realized this is the only life I will EVER have. Even if there was an afterlife or a Resurrection, this is the only chance we will ever have to live the life we have now. Sure some might believe that we will rise from the dead and be with God. But can you really call that life? Knowing everything, having no worries, not having to work, not having a chance to prove to yourself that you can overcome the trials of this world. Our innocence is what makes this life worth living. And by innocence I mean the blissful ignorance of uncertainty that we are faced with each day.
As humans, it's in our nature to question this reality. To explore it and learn as much as we can about it. To take pride in our achievements. To grow and evolve as a species while remaining naive to what the future may hold. The only thing certain is death. But it is up to us to be our greatest. To live our greatest. After this, it's over. We will never have this chance again. Whether you are resurrected into a new body and all your worries, uncertainties, fears and doubts disappear, or, as in my case, you simply die and cease to exist, no matter how you look at it, once this is over, it's over.
As the wise Solomon once said “This happens concerning people, so that God may test them and they may see for themselves that they are like animals. For the fate of people and the fate of animals is the same. As one dies, so dies the other; they all have the same breath. People have no advantage over animals since everything is futile. All are going to the same place; all come from dust, and all return to dust. Who knows if the spirit of people rises upward and the spirit of animals goes downward to the earth?' Eccles 3:18
It is all the same and it is all meaningless. No matter who you are or what you've accomplished, we all will face the same death, never to return to this life again. I wasted the first 3rd of my life. But I will not waste the rest. My faulty faith had me thinking I had 99 lives but rationality slapped me in the face to remind me that I only have one. It is up to me to make the most of it. To do what I think is right. To help people. To love people. To advance the human race in any way I can. Because even the universe itself will suffer the same fate as each of us. And the only thing left will be the void of eternity, forever silent without so much as a mere second more to express itself in any way. That is the beauty of existence. We were given a chance, one chance to shine amongst ourselves. So shine bright and live your life like it's the only one you'll ever see.
Much love.
For the first 2 decades after that, I was a big fan of the Mario series. I had all the titles up until Mario 64. After that, when the PlayStation came out with the Duel Shock, I abandoned Nintendo forever. But during my run, I got used to the concept of getting a second, third, forth and even ninety ninth chance of trying to complete those games. This was one reason why I loved the series so much. Unlike other games, where you get a few lives here and there, Mario Brothers allowed you to collect up to 99 lives. That meant you could keep on playing and no matter how much you messed up, you always had another chance to try again. I was no good at doing the trick to get 99 lives but my cousin was expert at it. So I would have him get the lives for me. After that, I would screw around and experiment with the game. I'd try things that I normally wouldn't dare to do if I only had one life. Sometimes I wouldn't even try to beat the game because I was having so much fun just horsing around. What did it matter? I had 99 lives. I felt immortal. What a great time to be alive.
Around the same time, I was indoctrinated into the Christian faith. When they taught me the concept of eternal life, my underdeveloped mind related it to what I knew best, videogames. This meant that I could do whatever I wanted in this life because I had 99 more in the next life to come. At least, that's how I interpreted it. Knowing that Jesus gave his only life so that I could live forever was like my cousin doing all the work getting 99 1-ups then handing the controller to me and saying "have at it".
As a kid, I thought eternity in heaven rendered this life meaningless. But I never told anybody. In my mind, there was no question about it. I was going to live forever and my time on this Earth was not even a fraction of that infinite amount of time. I learned in math that no part of infinity could be reduced to a fraction and since this was my way of thinking, I easily applied it to the biblical doctrine of eternal life.
So naturally, I screwed myself over because of this cognitive distortion. I did what I wanted. I sinned, asked for forgiveness, then sinned some more. I failed in school because I thought the rapture would happen before I graduated. I smoked and did drugs because I thought God would heal me if I got sick. I went to jail, told God I was sorry and asked him to get me out, then did more crime and went to jail again and again. This was life. It was meant to be wasted. None of it mattered. I had 99 lives and I wasted them all.
Then one day reality hit me. I realized that I had used up all my lives and was down to my last one. If I screwed this one up, there would be no more chances. What I mean by this is that I realized this is the only life I will EVER have. Even if there was an afterlife or a Resurrection, this is the only chance we will ever have to live the life we have now. Sure some might believe that we will rise from the dead and be with God. But can you really call that life? Knowing everything, having no worries, not having to work, not having a chance to prove to yourself that you can overcome the trials of this world. Our innocence is what makes this life worth living. And by innocence I mean the blissful ignorance of uncertainty that we are faced with each day.
As humans, it's in our nature to question this reality. To explore it and learn as much as we can about it. To take pride in our achievements. To grow and evolve as a species while remaining naive to what the future may hold. The only thing certain is death. But it is up to us to be our greatest. To live our greatest. After this, it's over. We will never have this chance again. Whether you are resurrected into a new body and all your worries, uncertainties, fears and doubts disappear, or, as in my case, you simply die and cease to exist, no matter how you look at it, once this is over, it's over.
As the wise Solomon once said “This happens concerning people, so that God may test them and they may see for themselves that they are like animals. For the fate of people and the fate of animals is the same. As one dies, so dies the other; they all have the same breath. People have no advantage over animals since everything is futile. All are going to the same place; all come from dust, and all return to dust. Who knows if the spirit of people rises upward and the spirit of animals goes downward to the earth?' Eccles 3:18
It is all the same and it is all meaningless. No matter who you are or what you've accomplished, we all will face the same death, never to return to this life again. I wasted the first 3rd of my life. But I will not waste the rest. My faulty faith had me thinking I had 99 lives but rationality slapped me in the face to remind me that I only have one. It is up to me to make the most of it. To do what I think is right. To help people. To love people. To advance the human race in any way I can. Because even the universe itself will suffer the same fate as each of us. And the only thing left will be the void of eternity, forever silent without so much as a mere second more to express itself in any way. That is the beauty of existence. We were given a chance, one chance to shine amongst ourselves. So shine bright and live your life like it's the only one you'll ever see.
Much love.
