Confession

Alexjb has OCD and its a really serious mental issue. He wanted to know why God was not speaking to him i.e. audibly. There was a guy that posted saying that ‘God is speaking to you all the time, you are just not listening’. Both Alex and I asked him if he has heard God speak audibly himself. He was just giving clichés instead of a straight yes or no answer. When Alex asked him again if he heard an audible voice, he just said they were going round in circles and he left. I was so annoyed and sent him a PM explaining that Alex has mental issues and asked him to fully explain his answer. He ignored my PM and never replied again to Alex. I was really fuming and as I left Alex’s thread I glanced at the next post from someone (Estherstar) who just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. She mentioned about putting on the armour of God. I wasn’t annoyed at her, but it reminded me of a sermon at church in my younger days about the armour and of me not understanding it. I’ve always felt frustrated at church leaders for saying stuff from the bible and not fully explaining it. So I vented my frustration in a couple of posts about clichés and of course this girl put two and two together and took it personally. I have apologised to her and tried to explain that she was an innocent bystander in this but understandably it’s upset her. I just feel so upset and ashamed of myself that I can’t come back to CF and risk doing something stupid like this again. I just hope it doesn’t make Estherstar think twice before posting again because she did absolutely nothing wrong by Alex, by me, or by anyone. She has only been a real blessing to everyone around her and I’m so sorry for hurting her.

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LottyH
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