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Blog Entries from SnowTiger

  1. April 16th

    Hi, Had a tough day today. Sometimes the evil voice that I hear really takes control. The voice becomes really powerful and I feel really terrible. I hear a nice voice too that tries to help me. The nice voice says that Jesus loves me and that I am saved by faith. The nice voice says that I need to have faith and then I will be saved by Jesus. Sometimes I argue with the nice voice and deny Jesus. Then the evil voice will come and torment me. So I guess I need to learn to just accept what...
  2. April 10th

    Well, I've been trying to be more faithful lately. I hear a voice in my head that constantly is calling me to believe in Jesus and his love. I argue with it sometimes but I have been more accepting lately. Sometimes I worry that I am too bad to be forgiven, but the voice says that no one is too bad, including me. I'm thinking about getting a subscription to PureFlix. I'm interested in seeing more Christian based entertainment. I'm still paranoid about the future. Today was a good day...
  3. April 8th

    Well, I've been feeling better today. I'm trying to agree with the nice voice that I hear in my head. The nice voice says if I believe then I will be saved. I really want to be saved so I'm trying my best to believe in God and Jesus. The good voice says all I need to do is believe and repent. I've been repenting but I've had trouble believing in my head and in my heart. However, today I started agreeing with the nice voice and believing I can be saved. I'm trying not to believe in all the...
  4. April 6th

    Not doing too good. I am constantly hearing voices in my head. They say all kinds of things. The evil voice laughs at me all day long and calls me "Hitler." He keeps saying I'm "Hitler." The nice voice keeps telling me to accept Jesus. Sometimes I accept Jesus but not all the time. The nice voice says that I must accept Jesus inside my head all the time. I don't think it is true though. I don't think Jesus will love me no matter how many times I accept him inside my head. I think I am a...
  5. April 5th

    Really worried about things. I'm having a hard time accepting Jesus in my head. I hear a nice voice in my head that constantly tries to witness to me. He says, "Accept Jesus before it is too late." The good voice says that I have to accept Jesus with my whole heart and soul. I can't just say that I accept Jesus. I have to accept Jesus in my head as well when talking with the voices I hear in my head. I'm really paranoid right now. I'm afraid an asteroid is going to collide with the Earth...
  6. December 12th

    Well, I am having a better day than I had yesterday. I'm still paranoid I will go to hell soon, but I'm not feeling as bad as I was. I get to graduate in about a week from now. I'm happy about that. I worry that God is going to create a copy of me and then he will send the real me to hell. So sometimes I wish the copy a good life. I try not to hate the copy of me. Sometimes I think I even met the copy of me before. I met a strange person at a Christian dinner who said he was the same as me....
  7. December 11th

    Well, I really think I'm going to screw things up. I really wish I hadn't gone back to school. I should have been happy with the way things were. People keep trying to help me, but I don't think I can be helped. I really wish my computer and my laptop were working right, then I wouldn't screw things up and I wouldn't go to hell. However, my laptop and PC aren't working right and I'm paranoid that I will get a certain grade in my classes and then I will go to hell. Everyone tells me I'm wrong...
  8. December 8th

    Hi. I had an okay day today. I gave some money to some poor people. It made me feel good, although I probably shouldn't have done it because I don't have much money myself. I worked on some paperwork for school also, and played a video game for a few hours. All in all, this weekend was pretty good. On Saturday I watched a movie with my parents and they really enjoyed it. Everyone says that God loves me, so I'm going to try to believe it. In my heart and in my mind, I really believe he hates...
  9. December 2nd

    Not doing too good right now. The voices are really getting to me. I think if I was saved then I would know I was saved, or I wouldn't hear voices or something. The voice in my head keeps saying terrible things and laughs at me. Everyone says that the devil will flee if you are from the Lord. The devil doesn't seem very afraid of me. I don't think I am from the Lord. I don't have too much to write today. I don't think things are going to end well. I hear the devil inside my head all the...
  10. December 1st

    Hi! I've been having an okay day so far today. I gave some change to a poor man and I bought a game for my PC. The good voice in my head says that "God sees the good in us." I hope he is right. I worry that the good voice is lying to me, but what he says is really nice. He says Jesus loves me and won't hurt me. I really have so many fears about God being out to get me. I feel so bad about my sins sometimes. Things could be worse though. Things could be a lot worse. I worry about magical...
  11. November 30th

    Hi. I had a pretty good day today. I watched Knives Out with my mom in the theater and it was really good. It was both comedic and entertaining with a good mystery. I'm trying to be more optimistic these days. I want to have a merry Christmas with my family. I've been hearing a nice voice in my head that says that God loves me and Jesus loves me and I'm not a horrible person. I sometimes worry that I'm a horrible person because of some things that I've done in the past. But the nice voice in...
  12. November 29th

    Well, I'm trying to be more optimistic again. The good voice in my head says that I have a choice who I believe in, Jesus, or the devil. I don't trust the good voice, but I do believe God has blessed me. I have a lot of blessings in my life. I have a nice family and I have nice belongings. The good voice says that I have something better than all the money in the world, and that is salvation. I have a hard time trusting the good voice, though. The good voice has laughed at me and insulted me...
  13. November 28th

    Happy Thanksgiving! Anyway, I still feel like I'm going to hell soon. I know I've predicted it before and it didn't come true, but this time I really believe it. I just think everything is going to go wrong. The voice in my head is laughing at me all day long. I just keep thinking I'm too horrible a person. I really feel lousy all the time. The voices I hear are constantly messing with my head. They pretend like they are my friends, but really they hate me and want to lead me astray. I...
  14. November 25th

    No matter how many people tell me God loves me I never believe it. I think it's because I hear awful voices in my head all day long. The voices laugh at me. One of the voices pretends to be good and seems like he is giving me good advice, but in reality he hates me just as much as the voice who insults me. He's laughed at me too and insulted me just like the mean voice. So I think he's just a pretender. I really think I'm going to hell for Christmas this time. The voices told me "You only...
  15. April 13th

    Well, I want to be more optimistic. I keep thinking I'm going to hell though. I keep thinking that if I get a certain grade in school then I will be instantly put into hell. I really like school, but it has become very hard for me to go to school because I have this belief. I didn't used to care so much about my grades, but now it seems to be a matter of life and death. I want to believe God loves me, but I hear voices in my head all the time that are very distressing. One of the voices I...
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