I've been going through some attacks in the last few weeks, both spiritual and from people. Hits keep coming. Fiery darts. Accusations, fear and doubt, confusion.
I'm overcoming all of it really well in Christ, finally. Because I think I've come to a point where I just don't care any longer. In a good way. I 100% understand why Paul said "for to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain". I've noticed that I long for death lately, in a different way than before, because life just got too hard for me, and I know I would go be with the Lord, and I can't stand the darkness in this world. But I love to walk with Him here in this life, I want to do as much as possible for Him, and He is making all of it so easy to face, so I'm not seeking death any longer. It's all for Him now, and for serving others in Him, Him through me. I gradually, then suddenly, went from being suicidal for years, to committing suicide in Christ, by falling into His arms, giving Him my everything. I completely accepted my death with Him on the Cross, so I could become alive in Him in this life and forever. Jesus is my Lord and to Him I completely commit my life. No more looking back.
My heart is now saying: I can't believe He wanted me. Why did He choose me? Why would God let me have this life? It's too good to be true, so how can it be true???
*crying*
No one can understand my gratitude, because no one can understand just how much God has done for me. How much I've been healed from. How much I've been forgiven for. My heart is filled with joy and His love. Overflowing. I've thought so many times in my life that it's over, but God has saved my life every time. Before I even knew Him. Then again, and again, I've self-destructed, and again, and again, He has restored me. And now I get to live for Him, and I'm the least deserving of it, yet, He has given me so much. He is so good, it's hard to believe it even after seeing it.
Good things are coming my way lately. And huge things are happening that I can't share, because I don't know what to make of it yet. I have no idea what He is doing, but I know that whatever it is, it will be amazing and all to His Glory! And He alone deserves all Glory!
I feel overwhelmed and kind of insane today, but it's like God is in a sense shaking loose the last parts of my old ways that I've been trying so hard to let go of, and He has for a while. I'm not resisting. Trials feel terrible, but I rejoice in knowing that when they are over, it's all for my good.
I trust that God has got everything in His control and that He will lead me where I need to go.
One step at a time. Can't wait! Whatever comes, I'll keep rejoicing in the LORD! His joy is my strength! Praise Him forever and ever!
I'm overcoming all of it really well in Christ, finally. Because I think I've come to a point where I just don't care any longer. In a good way. I 100% understand why Paul said "for to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain". I've noticed that I long for death lately, in a different way than before, because life just got too hard for me, and I know I would go be with the Lord, and I can't stand the darkness in this world. But I love to walk with Him here in this life, I want to do as much as possible for Him, and He is making all of it so easy to face, so I'm not seeking death any longer. It's all for Him now, and for serving others in Him, Him through me. I gradually, then suddenly, went from being suicidal for years, to committing suicide in Christ, by falling into His arms, giving Him my everything. I completely accepted my death with Him on the Cross, so I could become alive in Him in this life and forever. Jesus is my Lord and to Him I completely commit my life. No more looking back.
My heart is now saying: I can't believe He wanted me. Why did He choose me? Why would God let me have this life? It's too good to be true, so how can it be true???
*crying*
No one can understand my gratitude, because no one can understand just how much God has done for me. How much I've been healed from. How much I've been forgiven for. My heart is filled with joy and His love. Overflowing. I've thought so many times in my life that it's over, but God has saved my life every time. Before I even knew Him. Then again, and again, I've self-destructed, and again, and again, He has restored me. And now I get to live for Him, and I'm the least deserving of it, yet, He has given me so much. He is so good, it's hard to believe it even after seeing it.
Good things are coming my way lately. And huge things are happening that I can't share, because I don't know what to make of it yet. I have no idea what He is doing, but I know that whatever it is, it will be amazing and all to His Glory! And He alone deserves all Glory!
I feel overwhelmed and kind of insane today, but it's like God is in a sense shaking loose the last parts of my old ways that I've been trying so hard to let go of, and He has for a while. I'm not resisting. Trials feel terrible, but I rejoice in knowing that when they are over, it's all for my good.
I trust that God has got everything in His control and that He will lead me where I need to go.
One step at a time. Can't wait! Whatever comes, I'll keep rejoicing in the LORD! His joy is my strength! Praise Him forever and ever!
