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when's of puberty

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by janny108, Jun 12, 2011.

  1. janny108

    janny108 Well-Known Member

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    When did you let your daughter have her own facebook account, email account?

    Also I have a question about devotions. My 12 year girl does not do them. Our son did not either at that age.
     
  2. CrystalBrooke

    CrystalBrooke I'm almost positive I don't care what you think

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    12 year olds don't need facebook accounts..or email. They usually put an age limit on those things for a reason.

    About devotionals, I'm a little embarassed to say I don't even know what they are, so I'm pretty sure I've never done it either and I'm 23.
     
  3. CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN

    CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN ..

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    12 years old,I would allow a private Facebook,I'm not sure I would let them use there whole name or age.If u do,u need to keep the trash at bay,don't allow personal stuff for the world to see,like phone #.I have no idea,what devotions are,would like to know.
     
  4. tiffyof6ntwins

    tiffyof6ntwins momma6ntwins

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    my daughter just turned 13 and was allowed to set up email and a facebook.. however i have access to both and we agreed i would be periodically checking them if i felt need..
     
  5. CrystalBrooke

    CrystalBrooke I'm almost positive I don't care what you think

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    If I were to change my mind when my daughter hits this age, I would do this. As she got older I think I'd leave it alone so long as she proved that she could be trusted.

    My cousins are 17 and (almost) 13, their mother checks both of their facebooks periodically.
     
  6. hedrick

    hedrick Senior Veteran CF Ambassador

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    [Warning: I'm not a parent, but I am a Sunday School teacher for that age group.] Parents have different approaches. It seems to me that a sensible 12 year old is ready. I believe that Facebook has a limit of 13, so she would have to give the wrong birthdate. Doing so is pretty common, sometimes even with parental approval, but it might bother you. About half the kids I see on Facebook have their parents as friends and half don't. But they all have adult friends, even those who aren't forced to. At 12 you might insist on having access for a year or so, but by 14 or so I think I'd back off, as long as some adult you trust can see what they're doing.

    Email is harder, because unlike Facebook, it's not public (although Facebook has internal messaging that's sort of like email). I think reading someone else's email is obnoxious. It compromises the privacy of the other party as well as your daughter. But I do understand. Maybe you could periodically logon with your daughter and review who she's corresponding with and why, but avoid reading the messages except in particularly suspicious cases.

    I assume you're aware that most kids don't use email very much. They tend to communicate more by text messages. Next would be Facebook messaging. Email is typically low on the list until they get to college, where it's used with faculty and other students. There's only a couple of kids that I can send email to with any assurance that they'll read it. (Usually if I need to get them I have to ask the parents to have them read their email.)

    On devotions: Do you do it yourself? Do you talk with her about your own religious practices and experiences? I find that most parents don't. I've never understood that. How can you get kids to do something that they don't see anyone other than their Sunday School teacher doing?
     
  7. Darkhorse

    Darkhorse not PCUSA

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    There are several good daily-devotion books for different age groups, including Devotions For Girls by Tyndale publishing, aimed at the middle-school crowd. If you (or she) would like something more mature and hard-hitting, look at Can You Handle the Truth? I forgot the publisher, but it's at Amazon.
     
  8. Lady Derelict Content

    Lady Derelict Content Goodbye

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    I'm sorry for not seeing your post until now.

    Facebook, or any social networking sites are forbidden for my 11 yo Fiona. These places are not suitable for any preteen. There could be predators there.


    I have bought her a fine laptop but installed Net Nanny in it, which proves excellent, has powerful filters and good parential control. She has her own email account which I oversee.


    You might like this Australian website: http://web.1earth.net/~youth/Studies.html which I use with Fiona. It has excellent resources.

    ~Gaby

     
  9. Niffer

    Niffer Hook, Line and Sinker

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    A 12 year old doesn't need a facebook. I may allow an email address, as long as she knows that me or her father will be checking it periodically.
    She won't have a cell phone until she's 15-16, and only then, used for emergencies.

    As for devotions, I believe starting her at 12 is a wonderful idea.
    I remember being that age and going to a Christian book store with my Mum and looking through the different children's devotionals until I found one I liked.
    It was fun doing it every morning, and a great habit to get into.

    As for your own devo's - I would recommend "My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers. It's a daily devo, one page, a quick read, but oh so good!!
    His devotional book is a classic, you should be able to find it just about anywhere.

    Peace,
    - Niff
     
  10. illudium_phosdex

    illudium_phosdex Insert witty title here.

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    My daughter is 10. She's had her own email for at least two years. My 9 year old son has one too. I have access to both and do go into them occasionally. Neither of them has a Facebook and I've told them that since the age limit for any of those kinds of sites is supposed to be 13, that I'm sticking to that rule. They can get a cell phone when they are old enough to get a job and pay for it.

    As for devotional, I've purchased my daughter and son a few Christian oriented books for their age levels. My daughter likes to read before bed and goes back and forth between those books and what ever fiction she's reading at the time. My son doesn't read too much at all but he and my husband have long talks while they're playing LEGOs or working out in the yard together. I'm cool with that and think that for now, that pretty well takes care of his spiritual needs here in the home. I'd like to say that we do devotionals as a family but the closest we get to that are discussions around the dinner table but we have quite a few of those so I guess it's ok.
     
  11. FaithPrevails

    FaithPrevails New Member

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    My chlldren are not those ages yet, but they will not have Facebook b/c there is too much potential for drama and I've seen the way a lot of kids that age behave/post on FB and I'm not inclined to encourage my children to associate with kids like that.

    Email - my older son has so that he can communicate with his dad. Plus, he gets emails about Cub Scout activities that way. I have the log in information.

    Cell phones - they won't get them until they start driving independently and they will not be able to text.

    We do a family devotional time right now, but I feel that middle school is a good time for them to start an independent one.
     
    white dove likes this.
  12. united4Peace

    united4Peace Contributor

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    13 and 14 year old have facebook accounts. Have had them for a few years, they're friends are me and my spouse (their dad), my mom, lots of cousins and aunts/uncles, and kids from school. They both have email through the school, the school filters email so no worries. They both have cell phones. I didnt like the idea however since I nor my husband are rarely home (our kids are quite independant) it makes me feel better. they are not allowed to call on them though (way too much money) unless its a weekend, however they can text as much as they want! $25 a mnth. They are not allowed a lock or password on their phones and my husband and I check it when they dont expect it. Most of the time it is text messages by me though as I like to know where they are...or if they have to stay after school or telling them to do the dishes, laundry etc :)
     
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