What is the difference between courting and dating?

HazelWings

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I think they basically mean the same thing, although my understanding is that "courting" means to pursue one person with the intent of marriage. "Dating" doesn't necessarily mean that they are in an exclusive relationship or that they intend it to end in marriage. Does anyone really say "courting" anymore?

ETA: so they don't really mean the same thing after all :p
 
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KingCrimson250

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Courting is like dating, only more pretentious

Basically courting is when a couple dates with the intention of marriage in mind and certain vows of physical abstinance are present. Rarely it might be dating a woman's father before you can date a woman. In most cases it is essentially synonymous with dating in evangelical circles and is really only a distinction used to lend false piousness to the relationship, hence my first statement.
 
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kevlite2020

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Courting and dating confuse me a little. When some christians "court" sometimes it seems like they are doing exactly what people who are dating are doing. Are they not courting right?:confused:

It's semantics... that's the only difference. Courting is dating, except you can say it more high brow and add a holier than thou attitude to it. Which is funny to me because courting used to have a positive connotation and now it has more of a negative one, like: I'm better than other people because I don't date, I court.
 
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Im_A

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Courting seems too complicated. I am old fashioned I guess and missed out on this old, up and new coming thing of courting.

I get with a girl, we have a relationship, we then get engaged if we get to that point and then we get married if we get to that point. If goes outside of that, just nonsensical to my mind at that point.
 
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Miles

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I just wonder if someone actually says,
"I am courting my fiancee."

Good question... but how many people say that they're dating their fiance? If/when I find myself in that position, I'll probably just say that I'm engaged to her.
 
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Im_A

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Good question... but how many people say that they're dating their fiance? If/when I find myself in that position, I'll probably just say that I'm engaged to her.
Right. It is just every time I have heard the differences between say courting and dating, it always seems as if 'courting' is some higher level of closeness compared to dating. So I wouldn't expect anyone to say, "I am dating my fiancee" but since I don't know too much about courting because I have never 'courted' knowingly because when I get committed I don't give up without fights , so I don't need more semantics to describe what I am in with, I just wonder if courting is the step to engagement for some, or maybe it is a whole other realm of thinking period. Because I am sure alien of it.
 
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crishmael

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As far as I can tell, courting is when your parents are too involved in the relationship.
That's about how I see it from my reading, and often seems to hark back to those classic days when getting a wife was a transference of property from one dude to another. I guess the patriarchy addition makes the union extra holy. :preach:
 
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Im_A

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That's about how I see it from my reading, and often seems to hark back to those classic days when getting a wife was a transference of property from one dude to another. I guess the patriarchy addition makes the union extra holy. :preach:
So is that the same as the father giving the bride away?

:p
 
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Blank123

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Courting and dating confuse me a little. When some christians "court" sometimes it seems like they are doing exactly what people who are dating are doing. Are they not courting right?:confused:

its all just semantics. both types of relationships are exactly whatever the people in them make them to be. both can be used to describe exclusive commitment to one another leading to marriage, and both can be defined loosely to mean there's no serious commitment there.
 
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Blank123

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Right. It is just every time I have heard the differences between say courting and dating, it always seems as if 'courting' is some higher level of closeness compared to dating. So I wouldn't expect anyone to say, "I am dating my fiancee" but since I don't know too much about courting because I have never 'courted' knowingly because when I get committed I don't give up without fights , so I don't need more semantics to describe what I am in with, I just wonder if courting is the step to engagement for some, or maybe it is a whole other realm of thinking period. Because I am sure alien of it.


not necessarily. At lot of people use the term "courting" as an excuse not to get too close to the other person for fear of getting too attached, hence why a lot of people who prefer extreme conservative courtship have their parents heavily involved and refuse to allow for too much in the way of physical affection before marriage. Its all designed to guard hearts in case it doesn't work out.
 
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Im_A

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not necessarily. At lot of people use the term "courting" as an excuse not to get too close to the other person for fear of getting too attached, hence why a lot of people who prefer extreme conservative courtship have their parents heavily involved and refuse to allow for too much in the way of physical affection before marriage. Its all designed to guard hearts in case it doesn't work out.
See that's how I have seen dating defined at times lol.

I like my way better.

Relationship-engagement-marriage
 
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