We have to trust Jesus as Lord to be saved

JLR1300

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The issue is whether or not sinners have to accept Jesus as Lord in order to get Jesus as Savior. Or to put it another way, do I have to make a commitment to follow Jesus as my Master in order to get Him to save me from the wrath of God? Now this issue is a little tricky if you don’t think about it carefully. Now what do I mean by that?

Whenever we believe in Jesus we are believing a couple of things. On the one hand, we are believing that the blood of Jesus saves us and delivers us from the penalty of sin. On the other hand, we are believing that Jesus is Lord and God and by His power He will deliver us from the bondage of sin’s dominion.

We are not making a promise to change because that would be our efforts. We are not resolving to obey Jesus as Lord because that resolution would be a moral deed. We are not saved by our moral commitments and works. Rather we are simply trusting and believing that Jesus is going to change us. We are simply believing that, since Jesus is the Lord God, He is going to take over our lives and rule over us and make us the kind of persons He wishes us to be. It is not a promise to change… it is a firm belief and trust that He will change us. We are trusting Him to transform us.

Now it ought to be clear that, the trust that Jesus will change us, and the promise to change, are light years apart. One is faith, the other is works. One is the sinner simply trusting that, since Jesus is the Lord, He will take control of us and change us. The other is the sinner making a promise and a moral resolve to obey the commands of Jesus the Lord. The first scenario is faith the second scenario is works. Works are never required for justification. However, after Justification the Holy Spirit will lead us into works.

So this is what faith is… Faith is the belief that Jesus is the Divine Lord and God and Master of the universe…. and since He is the Lord I trust and believe that He will take my life and make it what He wants it to be, and that He will save me from the Mastery of sin in my life. Faith is trusting Jesus the Lord to save me from the controlling power of sin. But additionally, faith is also trusting and believing that Jesus’ blood covers my sin and thus, I am saved from the wrath of God and from the penalty of sin apart from all my works.

To put it another way, Faith is trusting and believing that, as Lord, Jesus will save me from the power of sin and, as Savior, Jesus will save me from the penalty of sin. It is not a commitment to save myself from the penalty of sin and, additionally, it is not a commitment or a promise to do the best I can to leave my sins. For justification, I am not promising to do anything. I am simply trusting Jesus to do it all. It is a belief. Period. It has been sovereignly implanted in my heart by the Holy Spirit.

Now here is an illustration..Let's say that you wish to be saved but, for instance, you are an alcoholic. You are not to promise Jesus that you will give up alcohol if He will save you. That is bargaining... and it is dependence on yourself for salvation. It is works. You have tried to quit before and it didn’t work anyway. Am I right?

What you are to do is, right now, simply trust and believe that Jesus Christ will deliver you from bondage to alcohol, and also simply believe that His blood covers your sins and makes you right with God right now, even though you do nothing moral and you do nothing good. Trusting and believing are not works… promising and resolving to do moral things is works. Men and women are not saved by works but by Faith. We must simply believe that Jesus the Lord and Savior will do it all.

We are saying, “Jesus I am trusting and believing that since you are Lord you will change my life, and I am trusting and believing that since you are the Savior you will save my soul.” That is faith in Jesus. Here are the number of moral promises and zealous commitments and pious resolutions you have to make in trying to submit to Jesus’ Lordship in order to be saved: Zilch.
 
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Very good post!:)

From my admissions to my sin problem, I'd gotten a couple of different answers as to what I should do.

Some have told me, you must endure and repent or you will not be saved.
Willful sin, without asking the Lord to help you fight it off when tempted,
will also send you to eternal damnation. I asked a pastor who told me, you must give up your sin problem, or you will fall at the time of your physical death.

The other alternative is yours.

Two different interpretations from different people.

I can look at what Lord Jesus said about if the eye sins to pluck it out. For it is better to enter Heaven with one eye, than to fall into hellfire with both eyes. We can look at this and think, oh my, how are we ever to endure this?
 
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JLR1300

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Thanks ever so much Nord...

By the way, in my opinion the instruction by Jesus about plucking your eye out is given for a couple of reasons.

1. It is part of the sermon on the mount which is Jesus' explaination of the strictness of the Moasic Law. Jesus was explaining how strict the law of Moses is so that the Jews who were trusting in their ability to keep the law for eternal life would realize that they could never keep it well enough to be saved, and so that they would abandon salvation by works. That way, later on, after Jesus died and rose again, they would be open to the gospel teaching of justification by faith alone in Jesus and in His shed blood for our sins.

Jesus wanted to show that if we depend on the law to be saved then we have to fulfill it totally. In other words, the law doesn't just demand that we not kill... it demands that we not even be angry with our brother without just cause. It doesn't just demand that we not commit adultery... it demands that we not even lust. It doesn't just demand that we not take God's name in vain... it demands that we not even speak an idle word. It doesn't just demand that we be as good as the Pharisees... it demands that our righteousness exceed the Pharisees. It doesn't just demand that we be good... it demands that we be perfect, even as the Father in Heaven is perfect! Jesus is teaching that the law demands perfection if we are expecting to be saved by it. We cannot let even the smallest sin exist. Rather than have even the smallest lust we must gouge out our eye. Rather than steal a single penny we had better just chop off our hand. We must be completely pure in heart for only the pure in heart shall see God. If you want to be saved by your works you must be perfect!

So you see what the law really demands? Can you live up to all of that and be perfect even as God is perfect? I don't think so. Neither can I. Jesus is trying to cause us to fall into complete despair about salvation by our works and obedience to God's law so that we will look to His death on the cross for sin and trust in that alone for salvation. So that is why Jesus said if your eye or hand offends you to cut it off.

2. Having said that I must also say that the Sermon on the Mount is also meant as a goal to shoot for in the Christian life. Jesus meant for us to strive seriously for all of these things... not to obtain justification and salvation... but in order to live as His children in such a way as to please Him and to bring blessings on our lives and to avoid God' discipline.

So when I read a verse like that about poking your eye out and cutting your hand off... I just pray.... "Lord I am not able to be perfect and I do not look to the law or to my works for salvation, I simply trust and believe that your blood covers my sin and I continue to depend on that alone for my justification... and I trust and believe that you will continue to work in my life and make me more like you. Thank you for your promises."
 
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Thanks ever so much Nord...

By the way, in my opinion the instruction by Jesus about plucking your eye out is given for a couple of reasons.

1. It is part of the sermon on the mount which is Jesus' explaination of the strictness of the Moasic Law. Jesus was explaining how strict the law of Moses is so that the Jews who were trusting in their ability to keep the law for eternal life would realize that they could never keep it well enough to be saved, and so that they would abandon salvation by works. That way, later on, after Jesus died and rose again, they would be open to the gospel teaching of justification by faith alone in Jesus and in His shed blood for our sins.

Jesus wanted to show that if we depend on the law to be saved then we have to fulfill it totally. In other words, the law doesn't just demand that we not kill... it demands that we not even be angry with our brother without just cause. It doesn't just demand that we not commit adultery... it demands that we not even lust. It doesn't just demand that we not take God's name in vain... it demands that we not even speak an idle word. It doesn't just demand that we be as good as the Pharisees... it demands that our righteousness exceed the Pharisees. It doesn't just demand that we be good... it demands that we be perfect, even as the Father in Heaven is perfect! Jesus is teaching that the law demands perfection if we are expecting to be saved by it. We cannot let even the smallest sin exist. Rather than have even the smallest lust we must gouge out our eye. Rather than steal a single penny we had better just chop off our hand. We must be completely pure in heart for only the pure in heart shall see God. If you want to be saved by your works you must be perfect!

So you see what the law really demands? Can you live up to all of that and be perfect even as God is perfect? I don't think so. Neither can I. Jesus is trying to cause us to fall into complete despair about salvation by our works and obedience to God's law so that we will look to His death on the cross for sin and trust in that alone for salvation. So that is why Jesus said if your eye or hand offends you to cut it off.

2. Having said that I must also say that the Sermon on the Mount is also meant as a goal to shoot for in the Christian life. Jesus meant for us to strive seriously for all of these things... not to obtain justification and salvation... but in order to live as His children in such a way as to please Him and to bring blessings on our lives and to avoid God' discipline.

So when I read a verse like that about poking your eye out and cutting your hand off... I just pray.... "Lord I am not able to be perfect and I do not look to the law or to my works for salvation, I simply trust and believe that your blood covers my sin and I continue to depend on that alone for my justification... and I trust and believe that you will continue to work in my life and make me more like you. Thank you for your promises."

Very welcome, JLR! Anytime Brother!:)

I can see what you mean. If the only way to get to Heaven is to fill the law in totality, then in reality, how many people could have gone to Heaven over the last two thousand years? My guess would be not one. Faith does help by leaps and bounds, as I myself have seen some improvements in my own life. To live our lives without ever having a single negative or lustful thought? Or being able to never give into the flesh? We're not Lord Jesus.
Only he was able to be perfectly sinless, as he was the Son of God.

Having the Holy Spirit, I believe can help us become live more righteously.
I don't believe we can attain perfection, but we still can be a lot better than we were before we were saved. Not saying of course, I would think I'm better than anyone, believer or not. I just know who saved me from having to go to that horrible place down there, when I pass out of the physical realm.

Now I do hold the belief that out of honor and respect for Lord Jesus, and what he did for us, we should try help ourselves live obediently, as much as God helps us. I wouldn't say " I beat it" , I'm conquering this sin problem" when I know it's Almighty Father God doing all the work, through the Holy Spirit. When I do get tempted I call on Lord Jesus for help. I know without him and God, I can do nothing.
 
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JLR1300

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Very welcome, JLR! Anytime Brother!:)

I can see what you mean. If the only way to get to Heaven is to fill the law in totality, then in reality, how many people could have gone to Heaven over the last two thousand years? My guess would be not one. Faith does help by leaps and bounds, as I myself have seen some improvements in my own life. To live our lives without ever having a single negative or lustful thought? Or being able to never give into the flesh? We're not Lord Jesus.
Only he was able to be perfectly sinless, as he was the Son of God.

Having the Holy Spirit, I believe can help us become live more righteously.
I don't believe we can attain perfection, but we still can be a lot better than we were before we were saved. Not saying of course, I would think I'm better than anyone, believer or not. I just know who saved me from having to go to that horrible place down there, when I pass out of the physical realm.

Now I do hold the belief that out of honor and respect for Lord Jesus, and what he did for us, we should try help ourselves live obediently, as much as God helps us. I wouldn't say " I beat it" , I'm conquering this sin problem" when I know it's Almighty Father God doing all the work, through the Holy Spirit. When I do get tempted I call on Lord Jesus for help. I know without him and God, I can do nothing.

Amen.
 
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twin1954

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There is no such thing as faith in Christ as Savior without submission to Him as Lord. He makes us to be new creations, not a reformation of the old one, and we are His sheep. Sheep act like sheep because it is their nature to do so.

Far too many rely and get their assurance from their obedience. Our faith is in Christ as all our righteousness, all our holiness, all our forgiveness, all our acceptance, all our blessings, and all our desire. He is enough for God and enough for us. We need nothing but Him. And having Him we have all that God requires of us and all that God is pleased to give us. The more we learn of Him the more we rest in Him and the more we rest in Him the more we are free to work for His kingdom and His glory.
 
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Matt Faith

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"...what must I do to be saved?" They said, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household." Acts 16:30-31

Repentance is a by product of faith. In other words if you really believe, you will want to repent. Our works show we genuinely believe, but its our faith in Jesus that saves. Again works are a by product of faith. Cause and effect. Atleast thats how I always understood it.

heres an analogy.

Its like saying, if you genuinely are a New York Yankees fan. Show me? Otherwise why should I believe you? Do you watch the games? Do you know the players? On what basis should I believe your a fan?

Its the same idea with Jesus. You believe? Great! Now lets see your life bear witness to that belief. Nobodys perfect, but the point is to try. Get up when you fall, and keep running.
 
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JLR1300

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There is no such thing as faith in Christ as Savior without submission to Him as Lord. He makes us to be new creations, not a reformation of the old one, and we are His sheep. Sheep act like sheep because it is their nature to do so.

Far too many rely and get their assurance from their obedience. Our faith is in Christ as all our righteousness, all our holiness, all our forgiveness, all our acceptance, all our blessings, and all our desire. He is enough for God and enough for us. We need nothing but Him. And having Him we have all that God requires of us and all that God is pleased to give us. The more we learn of Him the more we rest in Him and the more we rest in Him the more we are free to work for His kingdom and His glory.

Submitting to Jesus as Lord is a phrase. What really matters is what precisely does that phrase mean and exactly how is it related to jusftification?

People mean different things by it. For some people, Submitting to Jesus as Lord means to put Him and His will first in our lives and not to put anyone or anything above Him. Now that would have to mean that we must love Him above all else. Now if we say that we have to love Him to be justified or saved then we are saying that we have to keep the greatest commandment in the law to be saved since the greatest commandment in the law is the requirement to love the Lord with all the heart etc. So for some people, they start by saying to be justified we must believe that salvation is by the blood of Christ and not by the law... but then they say that we must keep the greatest commandment in the law by agreeing to Love Christ above all else. That is really contradictory.

To some people, submitting to Jesus as Lord means to agree to follow Him and His ways. Of course, His way is simply His teachings. He teaches people to love the Lord and love our neighbor as ourselves. That is Jesus' will and that is His way. So now we are back to submission meaning keep the commandments.

Or to submit to Jesus as Lord could mean to repent of sin. 1st John 3:4 says "sin is the transgression of the law.' So to repent of sin means to agree to quit transgressing the law... which is the agreement to keep the law. So now we are back to submission meaning keep the commandments.

Or to submit to Jesus as Lord could mean to turn from evil. But as I have pointed out before Jonah 3:10 says that turning from evil is a work. "God saw their works, that they turned from their evil ways." And Paul says that we are not saved by works, lest any man should boast, but by grace through faith.

No matter how you slice it, if we call on people to submit to Jesus' Lordship before they can be justified we are introducing works into salvation.

There are only a couple of ways around this. 1. You could imagine, as you do, that Justification occurred in eternity and at the cross and that the Justification by faith that we experience in our lives is nothing more than the realization by faith that I was justified. If you go that route, then it doesn't matter what order things happen in just so long as you are trusting in Jesus' blood alone and not any at all in your works or your submission to Christ as Lord. The order wouldn't matter... only what you are trusting for salvation would be the issue.

2. Or as I do, you could believe that individual official justification does not occur until you are given faith. In that case you could not put Submission to Jesus' Lordship prior to justification since that would require works to be performed for justification.... which is unbiblical. So what I do is I believe in this order.... Election... the gift of faith...Justification... regeneration and adoption... turning from sin and submitting to Jesus etc.

Faith is the trust and belief that I am saved by Jesus' blood and not by anything I do. It involves the belief that Jesus is Lord. It does not involve acts of submission and love and commitment and promises to quit sinning Those are works.

We cannot really in genuine godly sorrow turn from sin until we are regenerated and have the Spirit. But we cannot get regenerated and receive the Spirit prior to justification. Paul said that "the one who does not work but believes on Him who justifies the UNGODLY, His faith is accounted for righteousness." So according to this verse we cannot be regenerated prior to justification because God justifies the ungodly not the regenerate. The Spirit gives us faith and immediately Justifies us and regenerates us and enters us all in a moments time.... but it has to be in that order. We are not made good through regeneration and then justified ... God justifies the ungodly.

I am still open (but not very much) to the possibility that Justification is like you say and in our lifetime is only us realizing by faith that we are justified... that might solve some issues... However it also creates some issues. For instance it seems to create a problem because the Apostles never seemed to say things like "believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you were saved"???????? Huh? Or as Paul says in Romans 10 if you will confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead YOU WERE SAVED? or You shall be saved? You shall be.

thanks...your friend JLR
 
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JLR1300

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"...what must I do to be saved?" They said, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household." Acts 16:30-31

Repentance is a by product of faith. In other words if you really believe, you will want to repent. Our works show we genuinely believe, but its our faith in Jesus that saves. Again works are a by product of faith. Cause and effect. Atleast thats how I always understood it.

heres an analogy.

Its like saying, if you genuinely are a New York Yankees fan. Show me? Otherwise why should I believe you? Do you watch the games? Do you know the players? On what basis should I believe your a fan?

Its the same idea with Jesus. You believe? Great! Now lets see your life bear witness to that belief. Nobodys perfect, but the point is to try. Get up when you fall, and keep running.

thanks ... I like your reply.... my only question is this.... is there faith and then justification and then the by product of repentance... or is there faith and then the by product of repentance and then justification?

IMHO One is justification by faith alone ... the other is justification by faith plus works.
 
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mikedsjr

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Matt, I was only recently reminded, in this forum, of the term Lordship Salvation, which I reject. Those who believe such are not being truthful to their followers when talking salvation. They should be say, "Repent, believe & do good works for salvation". And here I am being questioned sometimes for why I am a Baptist for believing baptism saves when it goes hand in hand with many verses in Scripture regarding belief. Even Acts you referenced goes on to baptize the whole family.
 
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JLR1300

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Matt, I was only recently reminded, in this forum, of the term Lordship Salvation, which I reject. Those who believe such are not being truthful to their followers when talking salvation. They should be say, "Repent, believe & do good works for salvation". And here I am being questioned sometimes for why I am a Baptist for believing baptism saves when it goes hand in hand with many verses in Scripture regarding belief. Even Acts you referenced goes on to baptize the whole family.

Yes, if the Lordship people were perfectly consistent they would preach the Gospel to sinners like this... "In order to be saved you must believe that salvation is not by your works or efforts or by the attempt to keep the commandments in the law.... You must trust what Jesus did at the cross alone to save you...

However, you also submit to Jesus as Lord and that means submit to His teachings... and He taught that you must make a commitment to hate your father and mother and brother and sister and Love Jesus supremely, which is to say... you must commit right now to keep the greatest commandment in the law which is to Love the Lord with all your heart... and yet you must not trust in your attempts to keep the law! So submit to the Lordship of Christ in the area of Love for God.

...submit to His Lordship... as Lord and Master He teaches that we must be perfect even as the Father in Heaven is perfect... we must submit to His Lordship in that area and every area to be saved....but while you are trying to be perfect you must not trust in any works or deeds for salvation!

And also you must repent of all your sins. and since sin is the transgression of the law (1 John 3:4)... you must agree to keep the law to be saved... and Yet, you must not look to the law to be saved but trust in Christ alone... Also you must turn from evil before you can be justified... and yet, turning from evil is a work (Jonah 3:10) so don't trust in works... we are saved by grace. Now sinner! Don't you understand this simple Gospel? I have made it so simple... so what doth hinder you to become a Christian????

The sinner answers...."Sirs, I am really confused!"
 
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Matt Faith

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I always thought baptism was public profession of your faith. It does not save, but its a public act of obedience for the new believer. At my church its taught its like wearing a wedding ring, your still married whether you wear it or not. But by wearing it you identifying as being married. This is a tricky topic though, that I am not an expert on.
 
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Matt Faith

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thanks ... I like your reply.... my only question is this.... is there faith and then justification and then the by product of repentance... or is there faith and then the by product of repentance and then justification?

IMHO One is justification by faith alone ... the other is justification by faith plus works.

Thank you, I'm having a hard time following what your asking though? Can you please clarify your question for me?
 
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JLR1300

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Thank you, I'm having a hard time following what your asking though? Can you please clarify your question for me?

Well you were saying that faith causes repentance. My question is where does justification fit in. Is the order of salvation...

Faith-Justification-repentance or is the order Faith-repentance-justification?

Either way faith produces repentance as a by product but the first way justification is really by faith alone whereas the second way we have faith and also must repent before justification can occur.

Anyway I was just curious...

There are two Greek words for repentance Metanoia and Metamelomai. Metanoia means to change your mind.... Metamelomai means to sorrow and regret. In all the passages about how to get saved Metanoia is used...never metamelomai. So I believe that we must change our minds (Metanoia) regarding Christ and believe in Him as Savior... and then we are justified... but then the Holy Spirit indwells us and we have godly sorrow for sin (Metamelomai) and so turn from it and live for God. the Holy Spirit indwells us only after we are justified.... and only when we get the Spirit can we produce the fruits of the Spirit which are goodness and Love for God and self-control etc.

we cannot repent of sin before we get goodness and love for God etc. the Holy Spirit cannot indwell us prior to justification because justification makes us a legally clean temple. He will not indwell a legally unclean temple. The book of acts talks about being "cleansed by faith" because faith brings justification which makes us a legally clean temple fit for His presence.
 
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Matt Faith

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Well you were saying that faith causes repentance. My question is where does justification fit in. Is the order of salvation...

Faith-Justification-repentance or is the order Faith-repentance-justification?

Either way faith produces repentance as a by product but the first way justification is really by faith alone whereas the second way we have faith and also must repent before justification can occur.

Anyway I was just curious...

There are two Greek words for repentance Metanoia and Metamelomai. Metanoia means to change your mind.... Metamelomai means to sorrow and regret. In all the passages about how to get saved Metanoia is used...never metamelomai. So I believe that we must change our minds (Metanoia) regarding Christ and believe in Him as Savior... and then we are justified... but then the Holy Spirit indwells us and we have godly sorrow for sin (Metamelomai) and so turn from it and live for God. the Holy Spirit indwells us only after we are justified.... and only when we get the Spirit can we produce the fruits of the Spirit which are goodness and Love for God and self-control etc.

we cannot repent of sin before we get goodness and love for God etc. the Holy Spirit cannot indwell us prior to justification because justification makes us a legally clean temple. He will not indwell a legally unclean temple. The book of acts talks about being "cleansed by faith" because faith brings justification which makes us a legally clean temple fit for His presence.

I agree with what you said! By faith we are justified, and because of that faith the holy spirit leads us to repentance. :thumbsup:
 
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I always thought baptism was public profession of your faith. It does not save, but its a public act of obedience for the new believer. At my church its taught its like wearing a wedding ring, your still married whether you wear it or not. But by wearing it you identifying as being married. This is a tricky topic though, that I am not an expert on.

This is still something I've yet to do. The church I'd attended for a short time kept putting it off. I left that church, not for the reason mentioned above, but merely for the reason after the service was over, I really wasn't given much time to converse with people. Ones who didn't drive like myself, had to board a schoolbus, to take us back home.
 
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One day at the end of the church service, we had a young man come forward to be saved during the invitation. The pastor summoned me to deal with this gentlemen by showing him the plan of salvation. I took the young man through the Roman's Road and into the book of John to explain to him all that Christ had done for him because of the great spiritual need that he had.

After explaining everything in as great of detail as I could in that short period of time, I then asked him if he would like to like to accept Christ as his Savior. He promptly said that he would. I then asked him if he was ready also to take Christ as his Lord as well and explained to him what the Christian life was all about. I showed him in the Scriptures that Christ told us to take up our cross and follow and Him. I asked the young man again if he was ready to live for the Lord as well as accepting Christ as his Savior. The gentlemen then informed me that he was not and he left and never came back.

So often the world wants the assurance of salvation so that they may feel good about their life after death, but so often, man does not want anything to do with Christ on this earth if it involves some sort of sacrifice on their part.
 
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One day at the end of the church service, we had a young man come forward to be saved during the invitation. The pastor summoned me to deal with this gentlemen by showing him the plan of salvation. I took the young man through the Roman's Road and into the book of John to explain to him all that Christ had done for him because of the great spiritual need that he had.

After explaining everything in as great of detail as I could in that short period of time, I then asked him if he would like to like to accept Christ as his Savior. He promptly said that he would. I then asked him if he was ready also to take Christ as his Lord as well and explained to him what the Christian life was all about. I showed him in the Scriptures that Christ told us to take up our cross and follow and Him. I asked the young man again if he was ready to live for the Lord as well as accepting Christ as his Savior. The gentlemen then informed me that he was not and he left and never came back.

So often the world wants the assurance of salvation so that they may feel good about their life after death, but so often, man does not want anything to do with Christ on this earth if it involves some sort of sacrifice on their part.

Interesting story, Charles. You are not implying works salvation in this are you? The young man's choice was a very unwise one, to be sure. From what I know, once we are saved , we must not feel ok with what sin we've committed.

With myself, I do pray everyday and at night. I give thanks to God for all that I have. My conviction is strong and true, that the Lord Jesus was born of a virgin Mother, Mary. All he did in his teachings and healings are true as well. Also that he died on the cross for our sins. His shed blood saving all those that are believers in him.

There is a saying that God helps those that help themselves. I know it's God working through me that's helping me with my own sin problems. I don't accept my sin as something that's good, or in a "grey area" anymore. I can say with honesty,even after genuinely asking God to clothe me in spiritual armor, that Satan still doesn't get through the cracks, and I won't give in to my sinful problem of inappropriate content and lust. Do I think I'm improving, and not giving into this sinful addiction as much? Yes, absolutely. Although, I still haven't been able to fully repent, and not really sure if I ever can.
 
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