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Through fasting and prayer, Jesus set me free from OCD.

Discussion in 'Obsessive Compulsive Disorder' started by fwchsn2, Jun 2, 2010.

  1. fwchsn2

    fwchsn2 Newbie

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    I had no plan to upload my testimony here because I can't express myself in English. However, I strongly felt that the Holy Spirit kept urging me to tell people here suffering from OCD how the Lord Jesus healed me. I wrote my first writing in English on the internet, for testimony is to express the glory of God, not myself. I prayed to God that you all sees God’s power and his love, not my own story while reading my testimony.

    I had suffered from OCD for nearly 30 years, which means that I had never lived a normal life until God healed me several months ago. Checking, demanding reassurances and arranging items in a specific way had worn me out. I was the only irregular church goer, but God always sustained me, so that I was barely able to survive even though OCD had completely thwarted my passion and plans for life.

    It took so long for me to recognize the fact that I was an Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder patient. I just imputed my struggle to my lack of self-control or a character flaw although sometimes I thought something was surely wrong with me. Despite repetitive failure, I was proud before God. Then, I never thought I needed God’s help in order to still the severe storm inside me. It was only after I found the fact that an sufferer cannot defeat OCD at all that I became desperate and humble, and surrendered to the LORD. I read the testimonies that through fasting and prayer, the Holy Spirit completely healed so many terminal patients. So I was sure that my creator, God would also set me free if I tried it. I started my first fasting at prayer centre, where service was held 5 times a day everyday, but I got skeptical on the first day of fasting because I was too weak to pray. I thought only fasting was nothing without prayer and petition so that I decided to quit. Till then, I had never heard God’s voice and regarded that kind of experience as something supernatural for only a few special and spiritual people. But I was wrong. ‘God tells the poor in heart who is desperate and humble.’ I heard the voice of God in my chest soon after I gave up fasting. ‘You do not believe me about this!’ The voice inside me, but it was not my voice. I had never heard auditory hallucinations nor another voice from my heart. Except OCD, I was the kind of person who was rational and cool-headed. I was amazed and asked “Is it God?”, “I don’t believe you about this? Are you saying about fasting?”. Then, God assured me three times in different ways that I had to fast and pray and I resumed fasting and prayer. On the third day, I vomited violently over and over again so that I could not attend services at all and I was afraid if I would end up in the hospital, but, I did not give up for it was God’s will. I repented for pride and foolishness. And I couldn’t help but confess that I was the one who crucified Jesus and mocked him, neither the chief priests nor the Roman soldiers. During the break between services, I flicked open the Bible with inattention and Mark5:34 came into sight. “Your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.” Right at that moment, I realized that the Lord Jesus completely healed me so that my lifelong suffering was over at last. Early childhood onset, long history, no social life, ……. There was no hope, but God had mercy on me just like he led Israel out of bondage of Egypt. Hallelujah! I didn’t know what it means exactly whenever Christians cried "Hallelujah!". But now I also can shout “Hallelujah! My God is the only true God and Jesus Christ is my LORD!” with all my heart.

    My dear brothers and sisters, please take note of this:

    Jesus wants to heal you. That's why he was cruicified.

    "the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.(Isaiah 53:5b) "

    Jesus wants to set you free. That's why he came to this world.

    " He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, (Luke 4:18b)"

    "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. (John 8:32)"

    'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. (Jeremiah 33:3) '
     
    Last edited: Jun 2, 2010
    Jayangel81 and recoveringfaith like this.
  2. shelovesChrist

    shelovesChrist Junior Member

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    im so glad that you shared this testimony with us. 30 years is a long time and at first my mind almost had a breakdown because i couldnt imagine 30 years, but im glad that throughout it all, you never lost your faith in the Lord. you are encouraging to all on this forum. and i believe Jesus wants to make us whole, and i cannot wait until the day that we too are set free =] God bless .

    “Hallelujah! My God is the only true God and Jesus Christ is my LORD!” with all my heart.

    Amen =]
     
  3. seymourfaith

    seymourfaith Newbie

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    Thank you for sharing that with us. It is an encouraging reminder that the Lord wants us to be well and whole.
     
  4. LadyL

    LadyL Newbie

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    Thank you for sharing your testimony. Lately OCD has been spiking more, but it's to be expected with added stress. I am still hopeful for complete healing.
     
  5. kaykay9.0

    kaykay9.0 Guest

    Thanks for sharing your wonderful testimony. It does help us have faith to believe for healing/deliverance from OCD!
     
  6. Ribosome

    Ribosome I Synthesize Proteins

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    Thank you so much for your post, fwchsn2! This is fascinating! In what three ways did God show you that you had to pray and fast? How did you fast, and for how long? Did you eat in the evening, or did you stop eating completely for the duration of the fast?

    does anyone know where in the bible it says the verse
    "God tells the poor in heart who is desperate and humble."?

    the reason i ask is cause i believe god spoke to me through the bible in the times when i was completely desperate and humble. at the worst time in my life, i took the bible in my hands, and i prayed to god. i asked what he thought of all my suffering. i told him i saw no way out but suicide because the suffering is unbearable and lasted way too long. i asked if he wanted me to kill myself because i did not feel him in my life. i wanted to know what he thought of my condition. and after praying that with all that was in me in complete desperation, i opened the bible to a random page, and pointed my finger at a completely random verse without reading anything, and that verse read: "because of the devastation of the afflicted, because of the groaning of the needy, now I will arise," says the Lord, "I will set him in the safety for which he longs." psalm 12:5 NASB. it was about a week later that i had a giant improvement in my health.

    since then i had more hard times with my ongoing severe health problems, and in those times i would come to god in faith and ask him to speak to me through the bible, and i would open the bible to random page and point my finger and read that verse. i've done that many times now, but i only do it when im completely desperate, and each time i did it, the verses that my finger pointed at, all talked about healing of the body.

    in addition to those, my mom heard a voice inside of her similar to what the original poster mentions. she has heard it 2 times before in her life, but the 3rd time it happened when she was praying and crying about me. she asked god to heal me, and asked him to answer our prayers about my healing. just as she was asking god to answer our prayers, she heard a voice inside of her say "and i already answered." it was not her voice, and my mom is a very mentally healthy person with no history of any mental problems. after she heard that voice, my slow healing process started, and then i had a big improvement following my bible-opening incident that i described. my mom heard the voice again a few months later. me and my mom made a plan to have a "feast" if and when i'm completely healed. we would invite our friends who prayed for me and knew of my struggle, and we would celebrate god healing me, and i would pray a prayer of whole-hearted thanks giving at the table. one day my mom saw me grasping my head in agony, and the site made her lose faith, and she thought to herself in despair, "there won't be a feast." she did not even finish thinking that thought when she heard a voice inside of her say, "there WILL be a feast!" it was not her voice or thought, it was a voice inside of her. since then i've improved greatly, but im still in a the valley of the shadow of death (i have many health problems, not just OCD).

    god basically told my mother and me that i will be healed by him. when and how it will happen i do not know.

    my OCD constantly makes me doubt that god even exists, so its almost impossible for me to have faith in god. i have short moments where i believe and i feel such great peace and love from him, but the OCD steals it away very quickly.

    i know i must have a major spiritual change in order for the miracle of healing to take place. i know i must totally submit to god, but i just cant do it because of my doubt. i dunno how to do it and im stuck without a miracle!!

    i dunno what to do, how do i get that spiritual change that the original poster experienced? it seems impossible cause i can't fight the doubts about god's existence that the OCD constantly feeds me.
     
  7. I pray that I finally get to this point. Things in my life are so bad that if I could still go to heaven I would kill myself♥
     
  8. kaykay9.0

    kaykay9.0 Guest

    Praying for you! Hang in and try to get help if you are not already. We've all been there!:hug::prayer:
     
  9. Thank you Kay! Just really overwhelmed

    Single mother 3 boys (16, twins 7)

    Live in a small town, moved here from L.A. and still feel like I can't 'fit it'.

    Went from 208 to 260lbs in the last 10 years. Lost 27 pounds at one point just to get depressed and gain it all back plus more.

    Work in an office with 15 women. Have watch the one who don't like me turn the others against me. Constant being taunted with indirect insults that I can't prove but I just have to bare. Being at work feels like emotional torment. Can't trust anybody. I've been off from work so much I'm afraid I'll get fired but being in that atmosphere is torture. No ones saved only cares about drinking and bragging about what they got. I'm embarrassed because I am a good worker but I've allowed to get under my skin so much that whatever lies they've been talking about me appear true cause my desk area is backlogged and out of control. That is all for now...
     
  10. Jayangel81

    Jayangel81 Child of the Most High Supporter

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    Great testimony, thank you for sharing it with us. :)

    God can move very powerfully with prayer + fasting


     
  11. shelovesChrist

    shelovesChrist Junior Member

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    so its almost impossible for me to have faith in god.

    but its not impossible. despite how bad it feels, how dark it is, how alone it gets, we have to still push through and walk to the throne. its rough but He gives us strength, our hope is not in us, but in the Lord, even faith the grain of a mustard seed can move mountains. dont give up. we can't give up, He didnt bring us this far to leave us, He's not done yet, and when He is we wont even remember the pain. When it's all over, we wont remember all the nights cried and frustrations. We will be at peace with Him. He didnt create us just because and He would give us His only son if He didnt love us. He loves us and we know this because of the cross, and because we know He loves us, we know that He doesnt wish any evil upon us, but thoughts of peace as He says in Jeremiah. John 16:21 A women when she in in travail hath sorrow, because her hours is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world. 22 And ye now therefore have sorrow: but I willlsee you again, and your heart shall rejoice and, and your joy no man taketh from you. I've had thoughts of suicide when the thoughts were really bad, but its not over until He says, and until He says, we just have to give it our best. He loves us and doesnt want us to stop coming to Him, but He wants to help us and make us whole. I have faith in Him and despite our many doubts, we have to continue to press forward.
     
  12. Anupama

    Anupama Newbie

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    Dear Friend,

    The very base of bible is have faith in the word of god.Just for example : You know your mother loves you and she will do anything for you on earth to keep you happy.
    If you know this fact deep in your heart then will you ever doubt your mom again no matter how many voices enter your mind ? Same way we have to understand and get the bible in our hearts and trust in god.
    And if you constantly without ceasing join a local holy spirit filled church then slowly your faith will start increasing and doubt will flee.
    Remember DOUBT ABOUT THE WORD OF GOD is born of evil(SATAN).
    And your duty is get rid of satan .And for that JESUS has given a simpel tool called "KEEP FAITH IN HIM".
    Not all miracles happen in seconds.These internale changes take affect if we are constantly in touch with god till we die.
    When jesus can raise the dead what are the small things for him ?
    Surrender yourself completely to jesus.
    HE IS GOD AND HE DOESNT THINK LIKE US.
    God made parents so that he can make us understand the LOVE he has for us

    JESUS I ASK YOU TO SET THIS CHILD FREE FROM THE HANDS OF SATAN WHO IS GETTING DOUBTS ABOUT YOUR WORD.
    LORD THE DEMONS LISTENED TO YOU SO LET HIS MIND OBEY YOUR COMMANDMENTS AND SOAK IN HIS HEART AND MIND SO THAT HE CAN BE CLOSER TO YOUR FAITH AND FAR FROM DOUBT.
    God bless you.
     
  13. gracealone

    gracealone Regular Member

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    i dunno what to do, how do i get that spiritual change that the original poster experienced? it seems impossible cause i can't fight the doubts about god's existence that the OCD constantly feeds me.
    [/quote]


    Hi Grant,
    I truly believe that the original poster did experience a true Miracle from God. Reading it was a blessing.
    But I also believe that the Word of God teaches that for some folk - like me - and maybe like you He wants us to learn about the sufficiency of His grace and power IN our afflicitions. I've only had a one day one time miracle when I was so severely afflicted with OCD that I could barely function at all. There was this one day where it left me totally after much prayer because obviously God knew that I really needed for it to be gone. But the very next day it came back. This experience taught me that "He is able."
    Healing for me has been a long and ardous process. It has come through prayer, meds. exercise, ERP, lifestyle modification and the experiential counsel of others. But the "healing" is still from God. God deals with us as individuals and He knows what is best for each of us concerning the ways in which He chooses to work in our lives. I like to think He custom fits these things for each one of us. I still have OCD/anxiety but for the time being it doesn't have me. I mean it doesn't run my life 24/7 like it used to.
    It's important to lay hold of the small Words in scripture. Like "we are more than conquerors IN all of these things." This means that for some of us the lessons of living with an affliction teaches us that God is not inhibited by it. That He is able to work out His plan for us not only IN these hardships, tribulations etc. but in many cases because of them. It was certainly that way for the apostle Paul when he testified that he had learned "to glory IN his affliction that the power of Christ would rest more fully upon him." He was saying that because he was afflicted he had learned to rely even more fully upon God's power rather than his own for the tasks that God had laid before Him. This lesson didn't sink in immediately. "I asked the the Lord three times to remove this thorn".
    I think one of the hardest things for me to do with my OCD was to let go of instructing God or demanding of Him that He heal me in the way I wanted Him to and instead to choose to trust in His timing and His plan for my life even when I couldn't see the end game. It's best not to compare what God is doing in the life of another to what He is doing in our own life. My OCD humbles me... and trust me I need that humbling. It pushes me to seek God's face every day... and trust me I'm quite certain that without it I'd become apathetic toward Him. I might even become proud saying something like... "my faith is better than other's because I'm all better now." (That's just how great my own sin nature is.)
    I'm not suggesting that you don't ask God to heal you or that you shouldn't be fully aware that He can. What I am suggesting is that you consider that He may work out his plan for you and for me in an entirely different way than He did for the original poster. Whatever He does.... it will always be in our best interest but mostly it will be that we can point to Him and say.... "He has done great things!!" Which is exactly what the original poster did. I have had to understand what it means to open my wings up wide to the battering winds of my affliction and say to God... "I don't understand this but here I am opened up to you and waiting... "They that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength they shall mount up with wings as eagles... they shall run and not grow weary they shall walk and not faint." The Eagle never flinches or beats his wings in the face of the mighty and adverse winds...he turns directily into them, opens up his wings as broadly as he can... fully submitted to it... and then without even flinching one feather... he soars." God let me see this as I watched one of these majestic birds soar higher and higher on one very bleak and dark day of OCD suffering and because of this my heart was greatly encouraged. That, also, was a true miracle...that God would remind me of His promises through watching His eagle soar higher and higher.
    I'm praying for you.... "Wait and see what the Lord will do."
    Mitzi
     
  14. chsredskins

    chsredskins New Member

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    I have that same problem with my faith but when my mom prayed for me she said she felt like i had a lot of faith and that God told her that i had a lot of faith and that my prayers would be answered. So because of my ocd I think i dont have any faith or enough faith bu in reality i have a lot of faith. This proves that our feeling can be deceptive and that we should just trust in God and not worry. And a verse that came to mind when i read your story-
    So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. Isiah 55:11
     
  15. bluestormz

    bluestormz Newbie

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    I'm glad you were freed, I have just entered into Hell with mine. Honestly at times I believe in my heart God is there, but I'm at the lowest point of my life now. I have thought about suicide. The rituals I deal with are much more complex and powerful than what you had.
     
  16. chsredskins

    chsredskins New Member

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    Just keep hanging in there I know it acn be extremely difficult at times but god is a good god tell him how you feel maybe go to counsling I will be praying for u just put your trust in god your feelings can be decieving you must belive in god just by posting your post and by praying why else would you do that i have the same faith struggle. If you look in the bible peters denied jsesus, john the greatest man that ever lived was struggling with his faith when he was in jail, a guy in the new testament said. To jesus I believe but help my unbeleif. You are not alone I will be praying for you and loving you in the lord I had supefr complex rituals to one time i prayed for 10 hours I now through counseling i am completely healed of that
     
  17. chsredskins

    chsredskins New Member

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    That is so true. I struggle with faith and that is very helpful. thanks for posting that
     
  18. songofsolomon72

    songofsolomon72 Member Supporter

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    I just want to give a word of encouragement to all those suffering from OCD. I know no matter how much someone comforts you, you will still struggle, as I have. My issues revolved around salvation/unpardonable sin. I would go throughout the day trying "not to think" certain thoughts which only enflamed the situation. Just remember if you have a thought you are being tormented with, rebuke the thought, and just praise God in your way, like "Jesus, I am so glad You died for me", "I love You Jesus", "God you are my Strength". Praise God in the midst of your storm. God knows your heart. He is NOT an ogre in the sky waiting for you to stumble or fail. I know spikes will come(I have had them), but God will bring you through. Hang in there!
     
  19. AbundantAspirations

    AbundantAspirations Newbie

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    Praise God for your victory! You made it through because God is loving and because you were OBEDIENT. Obedience is key!
     
  20. peace2013

    peace2013 New Member

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    I am soo encouraged by yr testimony.You mentioned that you went to a prayer center,where was that and what is the name?were you getting some teachings.I believe God is in the process of healing and delivering me & this encourages me,have been fasting, and praying.
     
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