Straight men and gay sex

[Avatar]

someone who immediately goes into the "circle circle dot dot" mental mantra and lunges for the anti-bacterial loofah.

Well, steezie, after I was manhandled by this one fella I have to admit to getting out the anti-bacterials...

Thankfully he couldn't penetrate too far... steroids have their upside.

 

[Steezie]

Well, steezie, after I was manhandled by this one fella I have to admit to getting out the anti-bacterials...

Ok THAT one I'll give you

 

[Beanieboy]

In some places, like Brazil, the active partner can have sex with the passive partner, and the active partner will think himself straight, while thinking the guy he's having sex with is gay.

Yeah, of course it doesn't make sense, but does it makes sense when straight guys complain that a girl allowed them to have sex with them on the 1st date, although the man asked her to and had sex with her on the first date? Doesn't that make him as equally easy, or disrepectable or whatever stupid idea he has about her in his head?

 

[Tenka]

In some places, like Brazil, the active partner can have sex with the passive partner, and the active partner will think himself straight, while thinking the guy he's having sex with is gay.

I thought sex where one partner is 'active and the other 'passive' was usually known by the term 'Rape'.

 

[Floatingaxe]

THATS more like it

If thats your opinion, fine. But seriously, people do not appreciate being talked to like they're freaks of nature for what they feel.

And I for one think its the height of arrogance to sit there on your high horse and sneer at the "mentally ill" and to talk to people like somehow you're better than they are because "you just don't DO that icky stuff!"

Well let me tell you a little somethin' somethin', hon. Someone who doesn't recoil in horror if a member of the same gender gives them a little slap on the butt probably has more mental grounding than someone who immediately goes into the "circle circle dot dot" mental mantra and lunges for the anti-bacterial loofah.

Just one cursory glance at this entire thread makes me want to hurl. It is utter depravity that is the common denominator here.

Character? It is entirely lacking in the most simple of posts. I cannot believe for one minute that any of you have actually one idea of who God really is., let alone fine character.

I pray that you will find the forgiveness that only comes from accepting Jesus Christ as your own Saviour and Lord.

 

[NPH]

News to me. Didn't know straight guys banged (or were banged by) other guys. Seems odd if you're really straight. That's not to say I'm not flattered if a guy finds me interesting at the bar or something, I just wouldn't go with it because I don't see that I'd get much out of it. But whatever floats your boat I guess.

I think with most straight men (and much of what I see being said by the virulently anti-gay folk upholds this thought) the portion of sexual activity that defines something as 'gay' or 'homosexual' more than anything is the act of penetration. In heterosexual intercourse the male penetrates the female, never vice-versa (not with a living penis anyway) and so being penetrated is too uncomfortably a feminine position for them.

But receiving oral sex or even being a 'top' in anal sex, well those are things that men do in heterosexual activity as well so it's not so hard for a 'curious' guy to engage in those activities and still not see themselves as being gay. Performing oral sex is just a step beyond that and could still concievably not be seen as gay by someone (most likely someone not willing to admit they are at least bisexual lol).

Think of how often the notably anti-gay people bring up "up the butt" statements and you should be able to see what i'm getting at Of course, I think most of them are closet self-haters anyway

 

[MorkandMindy]

Why do so many straight men engage in homosexual sex?

It's a simple design flaw, the prostate gland (which women lack) is pushed on which has a nice feeling, but I don't think anyone wants a simple answer, this is Christian Forums not biological forums.

Also human relationships are not as simple as: 'that is sexual' vs 'that is not', but again this is Christian so things have to be either with God or with Satan and since neither actually exist we have to spend hours debating over which would approve of what if they did exist, and why if Satan was a killer from the beginning does God get nearly all the deaths mentioned in the Bible, 2.3 million minimum, and Satan only 10.

But we all like debating pointless theories and having a laugh in the same way as people still do 'what if' scenarios of past battles. If the Germans had landed 5,000 paratroopers in Kent just after Dunkirk they would have taken London and won WWII...

 

[Eudaimonist]

Why do so many straight men engage in homosexual sex? And I'm not talking about pedophiles (which is an entirely different issue) but honest to goodness adults hooking-up-with-a-gay-man sex? I know two gay men who both told me that they have been with straight guys and that straight guys flirt with them all the time. What's up with that?

I must live a sheltered life, because I've never heard of that before. My guess is that those men are really gay, and only slept with women because they were in the closet. But what do I know?


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[levi501]

Sexuality isn't some binary concept. People fit on a sliding scale.
Also consider that not everyone has the same sexual hangups. Meaning that a guy who exclusively seeks hetero relationships might still enjoy the sensations of homosexual interactions. Just because someone identifies as hetero, doesn't necessarily mean they have to find the idea of homosexual acts disgusting.
I find it curious that when a heterosexual woman experiments it doesn't have near the stigma of when a guy does.

 

[Deadbolt]

I find it curious that when a heterosexual woman experiments it doesn't have near the stigma of when a guy does.

But of course...unless it's in a Fred Phelps rant, he's the only one I know of who hates lesbians and gays equally.

 

[Snowbunny]

i think this is kind of begging the question... have we established this happens enough to make it worthy of discussion?

 

[MorkandMindy]

Just one cursory glance at this entire thread makes me want to hurl. It is utter depravity that is the common denominator here...

This one is the genuine female.

Gene-driven evolution suggests male success is down to maximum insemination (all else being equal) whereas females as carers of the little ones must keep them clean to avoid disease especially diareah (sp) or they die.


As for the male drive you would think to make good use of sperm that homosexual behaviour would be strongly selected against, but other factors may prevail. Team work is crucial, and have you ever considered how to code instincts for sexual behaviour?

A number of factors have to be included and a good match to the instinct will be achieved with a number of non reproductive situations.

 

[Eudaimonist]

Just because someone identifies as hetero, doesn't necessarily mean they have to find the idea of homosexual acts disgusting.

I would honestly find it surprising if a heterosexual man didn't feel some nausea (I'm not talking about moral disgust) at the thought of participating in homosexual sex. I know I personal do, though I'm not declaring myself the standard for all heterosexual men.


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[levi501]

i think this is kind of begging the question... have we established this happens enough to make it worthy of discussion?

It happens a lot, but can't be discussed as easily as a woman experimenting with another woman.

Out of curiosity I've asked women who consider themselves "very open-minded" whether they would date a guy, whom idnetifies as heterosexual but had on one occassion experimented with another guy. The response has been a resounding no. That they want a guy that acts like a guy.

In my experience there's a huge social stigma against guys engaging in homoerotic activities.

 

[levi501]

I would honestly find it surprising if a heterosexual man didn't feel some nausea (I'm not talking about moral disgust) at the thought of participating in homosexual sex. I know I personal do, though I'm not declaring myself the standard for all heterosexual men.


eudaimonia,

Mark

I agree. I was taught/socialized to think it of it as disgusting and effeminate. I however wasn't taught/socialized to think two girls going at it was gross though. Why is that?

This goes for women as well. In my experience girls by and large share the same opinion. Although in comparrison girls, more so then guys, find lesbian acts gross, they still hold the same opinion of male homosexual acts.

 

[m9lc]

I have to agree with other people that it can just be hard to get sex with a woman, so they just go to men for their casual sex. Men are just naturally less inhibited with sex than women.

 

[Steezie]

Just one cursory glance at this entire thread makes me want to hurl. It is utter depravity that is the common denominator here.

Character? It is entirely lacking in the most simple of posts. I cannot believe for one minute that any of you have actually one idea of who God really is., let alone fine character.

I pray that you will find the forgiveness that only comes from accepting Jesus Christ as your own Saviour and Lord.

And I find your attitude of judging people you've never even MET to be equally disgusting. I think its dis-honorable and in-excusable. You are free to hold any opinion you want, I honestly dont care, but to come in here and talk to people like they are monsters because you disagree with what or who they do I think is the worst example of the bad parts of human nature.

You say people who are open to homosexual sex are mentally diseased, depraved, and lacking "character". You sicken me.

 

[Eudaimonist]

I agree. I was taught/socialized to think it of it as disgusting and effeminate. I however wasn't taught/socialized to think two girls going at it was gross though. Why is that?

There's a big difference, though. You aren't one of the girls having homosexual sex. You are a third party. Why would you react the same way to the thought of indulging in homosexual sex yourself?

BTW, I don't see any connection to "being taught/socialized to think of homosexual sex as disgusting and effeminate" and my feelings of nausea. In fact, I was hardly socialized against homosexuality at all. The nausea seems for all the world to me like a purely natural and "unprogrammed" reaction. I could be mistaken, of course.


eudaimonia,

Mark

 

[gwenmead]

I think with most straight men (and much of what I see being said by the virulently anti-gay folk upholds this thought) the portion of sexual activity that defines something as 'gay' or 'homosexual' more than anything is the act of penetration. In heterosexual intercourse the male penetrates the female, never vice-versa (not with a living penis anyway) and so being penetrated is too uncomfortably a feminine position for them.

You might be on to something there.

I've known a couple of rabidly straight guys, so straight that they swore they'd actually do violence to any guy who so much as flirted with them. That never made much sense to me: I'm a woman, and guys flirt with me all the time, and if I'm not interested the response is simple (and doesn't involve beating the living daylights out of anyone).

I've made it a point to ask such men what they're afraid of, what bothers them about being hit on or flirted with by other men. None of them really have an answer - it's like they don't actually know what bothers them about it. Until I ask them: Are you afraid of being raped?

And then they tend to get really, really quiet.

Which makes me wonder: are hypermasculine, anti-gay males afraid of being raped? Is that part of the revulsion about all things gay, that an openly gay male is too much of a reminder that men can penetrate - and perhaps violate - other men sexually?

Makes ya wonder...

Veering back towards the OP, I'd guess there's probably a lot more sexual experimentation going on than not, and I'd see straight men "trying out" gay sexual encounters as part of experimenting. Plus I don't think that sexuality is black and white, either, I think it runs along a very gray spectrum, and most folks are probably more bisexual than they're willing to admit.

Levi501, let me be an exception to the rule you've found, about women not wanting to date a guy who's experimented with other guys: I have no problem with it at all. Indeed, I've been in long-term relationships with guys who had experimented with other guys.

But then, I'm a little weird that way, and like to refrain from judging people on their sexual history.

 

[JadeTigress]

Personally, I'm glad that people are open like that instead of being so closed off to experimenting with the same gender. I've never experimented with another girl, but if I were single I wouldn't be opposed to it. I find men attractive, and I find women attractive. I just happened to end up with a man, but if I had ended up with a woman I'd be cool with that, too.

I don't think that men who fool around with other men deserve the stigma. I personally don't see anything bad or icky about it (actually, I think it's kinda hot ). As so many people have said, sexuality is not black and white. There's a whole lot of gray in there. People should be free to act on any consensual desires they want without having to worry about their reputation or whatever.