I think we're at the point of a dog chasing its tail, Thekla. On the playground, whenever I'm on yard duty (which I happen to have this week, sigh), I see a kid kicking another kid. I confront him on it. The first thing the kid says is, "yeah, I wasn't the only one! That kid over there! And that kid over there! And yesterday another kid did the same thing!"
I guess I'd like to just focus on the first kid and ask him if he thinks it's ok to kick another kid. I don't care about the other three or four kids in other situations. I can talk to them right afterward. But the fact is, I saw this kid kick another kid.
As a mom, I never respond to the first fist reported; surely, I address the punch that's thrown -- but also, it is my responsibility to get to the root of the problem. More often than not, there were earlier events that informed this last bit of malfeasance; provocations, earlier strikes, etc. If I haven't gone past the final punch to the root of the problem, it's a disservice to both children involved. It's wrong ( tacitly approving the provocation and thus potentially allowing the problem to continue).
I do not consider my position to be aligned with your example ("Yeah, but
he did so and so ..."). Instead I am noting that the US press (and govt., and most US folks I spoke with and read) didn't care to or know about the fist punches thrown but focused on the counterattack. Ignored were Tudjman's evocation of the Ustashe past; the unaddressed repeated murder of Serbs, the naming of a state building after the Croatian author of the "Serbian solution" (convert 1/3, exile 1/3, exterminate 1/3 of Serbs), the recall of a Ustashe strongman from Argentina to a government position (who stated, re: his actions against the Jews he'd "do it again"), the suspension of pensions etc.
only for Serbs. In Kosovo, the repeated attacks against Serbs (including unaddressed killings) and moderate Albanians, the US covert support of the UCK/KLA and their (violent) provocations ... etc.
Does this justify the subsequent slaughter ? I do not claim it does. I don't desire to support any of the slaughter -- of Albanians
or Serbs.
These kinds of discussions, as I feared, always end up in U.S.-bashing or "yeah, but what about Americans!? They did x, y, and z." Perhaps we can just stick with the country in question. It always seems to divert to Americans and their hypocrisy. And no amount of admission of American bad behavior ever gets us back on the topic. Americans have been bad. I get it. The government is crooked. Got it.
We agree that governments can be ... wonky. That is not my point. US citizens joined in; how often I heard the response to the violence against Serbs perpetrated by Albanians
after the war - "well, given what the Serbs did this is understandable". But then wouldn't what the Serbs did in response to earlier actions also be "understandable" ? The same response was given by folks I spoke with for the US sponsored ethnic cleansing of Serbs (and some 1200 civilian deaths in the process of Operation Storm alone) -- it was understandable given what the Serbs had done in Croatia. Always attacks against Serbs were "understandable", even justifiable; attacks against others were horrors.
But the Serbian massacres, that was believed by priests and folks I've talked to, to be a hoax. I don't buy it. And I guess I wonder why we can so easily turn a blind eye because the perps are Orthodox and so are we? Just bugs me, that's all.
I am not denying massacres happened; again, given the tidal wave of (known to be just) plain false information given in the press - is it any surprise the people who were often unjustly vilified in the press and among the populace might consider many or more reports to be false as well ? Children of Serb origin were publicly vilified in this country as 'monsters'. Read "Arabs after 9/11". (Including a Jewish friend of mine who was picked up because he 'looked the part'.)
And all the defense of bad behavior, the "yeah, well, you guys do it, too!" added with buzuxi's arguments that death and mayhem yield good stuff, so let's not lament butchery, all these arguments only trouble me all the more!
Then I haven't made myself clear. I am not defending "bad behavior" -- except I won't defend it for Serbs, for Kosovar Albanians, for Croatians. I won't single out one group when all were involved. And I don't find it surprising that when a group has been vilified, and the subject of blatantly false reporting, that they might consider other reports false as well.
Finally, my point is this - why focus on the other guy's sins ? How many times when the press reports critically the use of depleted uranium, a list of conflicts is given
except in Serbia ? Clearly, there is not sympathy for some people's suffering.
Instead of focusing on your priest's shortcomings, what about opening trust, sympathy (making it safe for people to change their minds, openly) by saying something like "I regret that the US vilified and lied about the Serbian people." "It's tragic that so many Serbs were killed and ethnically cleansed from their homeland." "It's a shame we supported the training of the UCK, who used violence, instead of giving more support to moderates."
By
your example, by your sympathy, by your brotherhood, make it easier to face these things; and then, give it prayer, support, and time.