cont ...
I rolled my window down, he said something to the effect of, "Sorry to interrupt your lunch or break, but would you mind jump starting my car ? I have the cables, all I need you to do is jump it .."
The whole time he's talking, he's smiling, with a smile of "I know something you don't" type of smile.
I agreed to help him, and so I backed out of my spot and pulled in closer to him, popping the hood.
I got out to help him, but he actually just brought up my hood by himself, and attached the cables rather quickly. As I'm standing there, I look at his car:
ALL over his car's back and rear, are bumper stickers … like, maybe a hundred or so. I mean it's basically covering the back side of the car. All these bumper stickers are basically saying quick, short quotes: "Trust God" "Jesus Loves" "Trust God" "Believe" etc. Very basic quotes.
At this I smile, I look at him, he's still smiling at me, and I think, "Okay … if this is actually yet another angel, I need to ask him right now, straight up, are you an angel …."
And as I started to ask him, it's like … I couldn't. I couldn't speak. I couldn't get words out. I just stood there, looking at him. I felt dumb, but then it was like … I wasn't supposed to ask. I was just supposed to EXPERIENCE. To go with it. Not question just yet, but let whatever was going on speak for itself. This seems like a cop out, even to me, but that's what I experienced … my tongue was tied, and I actually believed I WASNT supposed to ask him, "Are you an angel ? Is this an answer to the prayer I literally just prayed ?" Again, this sounds like a cop out even to me, but that's what I experienced.
He finished up, thanked me, closed up the hoods, and drove off.
At that, I was even more overwhelmed. I had just prayed, "Are angels everywhere ? All around us ?" and immediately that was perhaps the answer ? That they were literally around us like that ? Simple as that ? No need to travel over land and sea … just go into a grocery store ? Pull into a McDonalds ? For some reason, this idea terrorized me … the idea that it wasn't rare to see them, rather, it was common and we were just oblivious or "out of the loop". Maybe we were involved in all the wrong things to where we simply NEVER came into contact with them, because we weren't involved in what they were involved in. This idea actually made me nervous and almost feeling like failure … as though there was an entire side to life that I had thought was more mysterious and full of mystique and "for a few" … but in actuality was all around me, but I wasn't a part of it as I had maybe thought.
That's the second account. Now for the third, and then I'll stop for now lol. A lot of typing:
Back around 1996, I had just gotten out of the US Navy ( I went to the US Naval Academy, actually). While in the Navy, I had a sort of epiphany moment. This was before I was knee deep in any religion, etc … yet I believed in "God". My belief was vague, but was based on what I would call "faith". I believed there was a "supernatural" entity that existed, that responded to "God". I had an experience when I was younger and had run away from home, that completely changed the way I viewed reality (during that experience, I experienced being translocated from one location to another instantaneously. It's a long story). So anyways, I believed in "God" in some form. And while I was in my final days in the Navy, I had a sort of epiphany. While at the Academy, I was basically almost a poster child for it … I excelled, I was in love with the environment, the opportunities, etc. The pressure was something I expected, I thrived. Yet one night, believe it or not, I began to see what I can only describe as a sort of "spiritual haze". This "haze" seemed to cover everyone and everything around me … and it seemed as though it blanketed everything in "fear". I described it as "fear". I began to see people just covered by "fear". It was unnerving. I wasn't the type of person who had a lot of respect for fear or those who were afraid … and so it was like seeing something I loved and was in love with, suddenly stripped down and made naked before me. What I saw all around me, was "fear" …
And somehow I knew, that I was "playing for the wrong team" as it were. I was doing something, that involved this fear. So after seeing this "haze" I found a chapel, where I could be alone … and I prayed to "God", and I told God that I didn't want to be involved with the wrong team. I wanted to play for the "right team", whatever that meant. And I prayed to God to protect me and whatever it took, to make sure I was a soldier for him, not for anything else. It was sort of an epiphany for me at the time … a mystical type of experience, but it was very real, this "haze" and this realization I was having.
When I left, I had this idea within me … that I was going to go and "find God", and even though it sounded insane, I knew where I was going to go find Him lol:
When I was a boy, my parents had taken me on a vacation to the desert of West Texas. My father grew up in Japan as well as Arizona, and so he had a love of the desert and they took me there on a vacation … to hike, see the wild life, etc. I fell in love with the desert as well at that time, so much so that when I returned, I was obsessed with it … I drew desert animals all over my walls lol, began to collect related items (Native American things, even some skulls for decor, etc). So anyways, when I got out and was going to go "find God" … I knew I was going to go to the desert of West Texas to find Him.
It sounded insane to everyone I knew. I was extremely intelligent, had a bright future, the Academy was a choice amongst Ivy Leagues schools that I had, I played football even, etc … yet here I was, claiming I was going to "go to the desert to see God" … it's like I was being drawn and pulled. It filled my mind, my being, I couldn't ignore it. It was like I was being … called to do it. To fight it would have taken effort. And it seemed insane, my father was an atheist/agnostic. I wasn't raised in an environment that promoted anything of the sort. No one supported what I was claiming, etc. Even the few friends I had who were believers, said I was crazy. "That's not God". etc and so forth. But I was one to consider the input of others, but ultimately I would think for myself and make decisions that I wanted to make … and I wasn't shy from an adventure. And I remembered my epiphany type of experience, my night of clarity where I saw that haze and had this belief that I was on the "wrong team", and praying to God and what I asked of God.
So I was going to go to the desert, one way or another … and my plan was simple: get a bus ticket to the nearest desert town that bordered the Big Bend area of West Texas near the Mexican border, and literally, just start walking out into the desert. Just … walk. Until I was all alone, no one around, nothing, must me and the elements. Either I found "God", or I didn't and perhaps I even died there in the desert. I wasn't afraid.
And so I did that … I bought a bus ticket to a small town about 100 miles north of that area, and my plan was to get off the bus, buy a gallon of water, have a few knives on me for protection from wild animals, and just … walk. "Find God" or else.
This is where this part of the story refers back to the point:
I rolled my window down, he said something to the effect of, "Sorry to interrupt your lunch or break, but would you mind jump starting my car ? I have the cables, all I need you to do is jump it .."
The whole time he's talking, he's smiling, with a smile of "I know something you don't" type of smile.
I agreed to help him, and so I backed out of my spot and pulled in closer to him, popping the hood.
I got out to help him, but he actually just brought up my hood by himself, and attached the cables rather quickly. As I'm standing there, I look at his car:
ALL over his car's back and rear, are bumper stickers … like, maybe a hundred or so. I mean it's basically covering the back side of the car. All these bumper stickers are basically saying quick, short quotes: "Trust God" "Jesus Loves" "Trust God" "Believe" etc. Very basic quotes.
At this I smile, I look at him, he's still smiling at me, and I think, "Okay … if this is actually yet another angel, I need to ask him right now, straight up, are you an angel …."
And as I started to ask him, it's like … I couldn't. I couldn't speak. I couldn't get words out. I just stood there, looking at him. I felt dumb, but then it was like … I wasn't supposed to ask. I was just supposed to EXPERIENCE. To go with it. Not question just yet, but let whatever was going on speak for itself. This seems like a cop out, even to me, but that's what I experienced … my tongue was tied, and I actually believed I WASNT supposed to ask him, "Are you an angel ? Is this an answer to the prayer I literally just prayed ?" Again, this sounds like a cop out even to me, but that's what I experienced.
He finished up, thanked me, closed up the hoods, and drove off.
At that, I was even more overwhelmed. I had just prayed, "Are angels everywhere ? All around us ?" and immediately that was perhaps the answer ? That they were literally around us like that ? Simple as that ? No need to travel over land and sea … just go into a grocery store ? Pull into a McDonalds ? For some reason, this idea terrorized me … the idea that it wasn't rare to see them, rather, it was common and we were just oblivious or "out of the loop". Maybe we were involved in all the wrong things to where we simply NEVER came into contact with them, because we weren't involved in what they were involved in. This idea actually made me nervous and almost feeling like failure … as though there was an entire side to life that I had thought was more mysterious and full of mystique and "for a few" … but in actuality was all around me, but I wasn't a part of it as I had maybe thought.
That's the second account. Now for the third, and then I'll stop for now lol. A lot of typing:
Back around 1996, I had just gotten out of the US Navy ( I went to the US Naval Academy, actually). While in the Navy, I had a sort of epiphany moment. This was before I was knee deep in any religion, etc … yet I believed in "God". My belief was vague, but was based on what I would call "faith". I believed there was a "supernatural" entity that existed, that responded to "God". I had an experience when I was younger and had run away from home, that completely changed the way I viewed reality (during that experience, I experienced being translocated from one location to another instantaneously. It's a long story). So anyways, I believed in "God" in some form. And while I was in my final days in the Navy, I had a sort of epiphany. While at the Academy, I was basically almost a poster child for it … I excelled, I was in love with the environment, the opportunities, etc. The pressure was something I expected, I thrived. Yet one night, believe it or not, I began to see what I can only describe as a sort of "spiritual haze". This "haze" seemed to cover everyone and everything around me … and it seemed as though it blanketed everything in "fear". I described it as "fear". I began to see people just covered by "fear". It was unnerving. I wasn't the type of person who had a lot of respect for fear or those who were afraid … and so it was like seeing something I loved and was in love with, suddenly stripped down and made naked before me. What I saw all around me, was "fear" …
And somehow I knew, that I was "playing for the wrong team" as it were. I was doing something, that involved this fear. So after seeing this "haze" I found a chapel, where I could be alone … and I prayed to "God", and I told God that I didn't want to be involved with the wrong team. I wanted to play for the "right team", whatever that meant. And I prayed to God to protect me and whatever it took, to make sure I was a soldier for him, not for anything else. It was sort of an epiphany for me at the time … a mystical type of experience, but it was very real, this "haze" and this realization I was having.
When I left, I had this idea within me … that I was going to go and "find God", and even though it sounded insane, I knew where I was going to go find Him lol:
When I was a boy, my parents had taken me on a vacation to the desert of West Texas. My father grew up in Japan as well as Arizona, and so he had a love of the desert and they took me there on a vacation … to hike, see the wild life, etc. I fell in love with the desert as well at that time, so much so that when I returned, I was obsessed with it … I drew desert animals all over my walls lol, began to collect related items (Native American things, even some skulls for decor, etc). So anyways, when I got out and was going to go "find God" … I knew I was going to go to the desert of West Texas to find Him.
It sounded insane to everyone I knew. I was extremely intelligent, had a bright future, the Academy was a choice amongst Ivy Leagues schools that I had, I played football even, etc … yet here I was, claiming I was going to "go to the desert to see God" … it's like I was being drawn and pulled. It filled my mind, my being, I couldn't ignore it. It was like I was being … called to do it. To fight it would have taken effort. And it seemed insane, my father was an atheist/agnostic. I wasn't raised in an environment that promoted anything of the sort. No one supported what I was claiming, etc. Even the few friends I had who were believers, said I was crazy. "That's not God". etc and so forth. But I was one to consider the input of others, but ultimately I would think for myself and make decisions that I wanted to make … and I wasn't shy from an adventure. And I remembered my epiphany type of experience, my night of clarity where I saw that haze and had this belief that I was on the "wrong team", and praying to God and what I asked of God.
So I was going to go to the desert, one way or another … and my plan was simple: get a bus ticket to the nearest desert town that bordered the Big Bend area of West Texas near the Mexican border, and literally, just start walking out into the desert. Just … walk. Until I was all alone, no one around, nothing, must me and the elements. Either I found "God", or I didn't and perhaps I even died there in the desert. I wasn't afraid.
And so I did that … I bought a bus ticket to a small town about 100 miles north of that area, and my plan was to get off the bus, buy a gallon of water, have a few knives on me for protection from wild animals, and just … walk. "Find God" or else.
This is where this part of the story refers back to the point:
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