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Is A Bottle Of Wine/Night Bad?

Discussion in 'Addictions & Substances' started by ArtisticAthlete, Jan 6, 2009.

  1. Hola!

    If I can drink a bottle of wine in one night...is that bad? Is that showing signs of alcoholism? I have one of those huge wine goblets and it almost holds a bottle of wine. If I somewhat fill it up, start talking w/ my girls and watching TV...before you know it...it's gone. Well, it takes about an hr or two but you get my drift. Is that bad?

    Recently, when I go to the store to buy wine, an alcoholic always catches my eye (<--There always seems to be one of those male/females, on the isle, that you know drinks too much just by looking at them) and the same thought pops in my head: "If you don't slow down...you'll end up like them!" I'm only 20-something...could God be warning me?

    Edit: I forgot to add that I don't have a bottle of wine/night every night. But, if I do drink wine...I can drink a bottle. How often does it happen? Maybe like 2 times/month. But, I'm wondering if I'm starting a bad habit. I don't want to start something that will spiral out of control. I'm a very instinctual person so maybe I'm answering my own question by posting this thread :)
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 6, 2009
  2. Orville

    Orville Guest

    That's a lot of wine. You want to be really careful this doesn't become a more common occurrence, but even a couple times a month isn't great. You must be feeling pretty slammed when your goblet is empty.

    I have nothing against drinking. I myself drink in moderation, which is why the idea of drinking an entire bottle of wine in one sitting concerns me.

    Here's a suggestion, next time you want some wine, use a regular wine glass, and limit yourself to one or two. One of the things I think about is how I really enjoy a beer or a whiskey from time to time and I would hate to have to give them up because I became an alcoholic.
     
  3. No, I'm not slammed after a bottle of wine. That's a bad sign huh? I used to not be able to drink a whole bottle but now I can. I can slowly drink more and more. I used to have a hangover the next day but now I don't...
     
  4. BobW188

    BobW188 Growling Maverick

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    I'd say you are starting a bad habit. You may drink infrequently; but it's a bad sign that you always or almost always end up killing the bottle.
    It's very easy to do, and it's how I started in the early days. You get busy with conversation, a hobby, even reading or just thinking, notice your glass is getting empty, and refill it reflexively; but if you have alcoholic tendencies you're soon buying the bottle to take home and empty. You can go a good many years this way with no one suspecting you have a drinking problem, even when it becomes a bottle a night. And it's surprisingly easy to kid yourself. (Take it from me, and others who will reply here, you don't want to find out how easy.)
    Turn the big goblet into a planter and try doing without for a month. If you find yourself having cravings, some real problems adjusting, you're on notice you have a problem. If you can in total honesty say you did fine without it, you might just need a smaller glass and a little more attentiveness. And keep us posted.
     
  5. Orville

    Orville Guest

    It says you have developed a high tolerance, which in turn means you will drink more, which isn't good.

    Just limit yourself so you don't end up with a problem, because once you have an actual problem you have to abstain. I wouldn't want to become an alcoholic simply because I love a good beer and I'd hate to have to give it up because I abused it.
     
  6. Thanks for the replies. I threw the wine away and I'm going to see how long I can go w/o drinking. I used to drink A LOT in undergrad and I remember my coach telling me that he thought I had a drinking problem...I shrugged it off. I stopped drinking for 2yrs but now if I drink, I'll drink wine. No liquor, shots or anything else I used to drink in UG.

    But, I'm trying to turn my life around and I prayed for God to use me as he sees fit. Now, even when I drink wine...I get this weird feeling not to even drink wine. This is also when I started noticing the alcoholics on the wine/liquor isle in the grocery store when I would buy wine; I've never noticed them before. Also, when I go to buy wine, I feel guilty for some odd reason. Strange huh?
     
  7. BobW188

    BobW188 Growling Maverick

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    No. Frankly, I suspect most of us had that feeling; and just dismissed it. (See my remark about the ease of kidding oneself). We AA's speak of alcoholism as "cunning, baffling, powerful." Even in the early stages it subverts good sense and judgment. I'd take that guilt feeling very seriously!
     
  8. Orville

    Orville Guest

    Not strange at all. You knew you had a problem and you wanted confirmation. I was a binge drinker when I was young. Senior year of high school and the following three or four years, every weekend was New Year's Eve. I only drank on the weekends, but with not control at all. I went totally dry for five years, and then started to actually enjoy a drink here and there. I found a reasonable limit that I don't go beyond, and actually I rarely have more than a glass of wine or a beer with dinner.
     
  9. devonian

    devonian Junior Member

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    Alcoholism is not defined by how much you drink, or how often you drink. It is defined by your ability to stop once you start, and your mental state prior to taking your first drink.

    The ability to stop can be best described as a craving. Once an alcoholic takes their first drink, they crave more, until they run out. Few alcoholics will leave a half empty glass on the table when everyone else is leaving. I have, but it was to deceive the people who were with me, and I knew I had more at home. A good way to test for this is to drink only one or two regular sized drinks, and abruptly stop for the night. Try this several times. Different days of course. If you can honestly say that you really didn't want more, then you probably do not have the first part of the disease of alcoholism.

    The mental state prior to taking your first drink can best be described as becoming restless, irritable, and discontent, until you finally take the first drink. This is of course not the only reason for taking the first drink. We often start drinking because we are celebrating. But most of us will become restless, irritable, or discontent, if we have decided to NOT drink when everyone else is celebrating and drinking. A good test for this is to stop drinking altogether for a year and see if you can do it. If an alcoholic is early in their progression, they may make it. But anyone who has progressed far, will be highly unlikely to succeed.

    I was around 22 when I began to suspect that I could not drink like other people. Looking back, I definitely had the cravings, even from the first time I got drunk. But, my drinking pattern started out as once in a while, then twice a month, then only on most weekends, then every weekend, then once or twice a week, until finally I was getting drunk 6 nights a week. I reserved one night a week to prove to myself that I could stop at any time... we are very good at deceiving ourselves... I actually believe that by stopping once a week, I had it under control.

    Please be aware that there is a solution. If you are ready to find it, please continue to post your questions here. We are available to help.
     
  10. Yeah, I decided I should stop drinking in general. Like you stated in the beginning of your post, it's not how often you drink but your ability to stop once you've started. I used to just drink, drink, drink until we ran out of stuff to drink but now, that's not really the case. BUT, it's b/c I try to control myself...the urge is still there. So, with that said, I should just abstain from alcohol...period.

    I have an "overdue-it" personality; I tend to go overboard w/ everything...especially fun stuff like drinking and partying (<--which is why I don't drink/party that much anymore). So, my goal is to not drink for the month of Jan...and just keep going from there. I've gone 3yrs w/o drinking so I know it's doable.

    Also, does anyone know why I suddenly get blackouts now? I never used to get blackouts until I stopped drinking for 3yrs then started again. I don't get blackouts every time, but they're pretty frequent if I do drink. Like, I won't even consider myself wasted but I'll wake up the next morning (w/o a hangover) and forget some of the small things I did the night before. I guess that's called a 'mini blackout'? Anyway, out of 5 times of drinking, it'll probably happen 2 times. :confused:
     
  11. BobW188

    BobW188 Growling Maverick

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    All I can tell you is that that is a very, very bad sign; and I think I speak for all of us when I say it makes us doubly happy that you're going to try to stop. Be aware that if you start again, you'll very quickly be back to where you were. You retain the level of tolerance you'd already reached even after your sysytem is free of alcohol.

    And do keep in touch.
     
  12. devonian

    devonian Junior Member

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    It sounds like you meet the first part of the disease, especially since you say the urge is still there. This part is the part that alcoholics are born with, and have no control over. The easiest answer is do as you say: "abstain from alcohol... period.".

    Hopefully you don't have the second part of the disease. I'm happy to hear that you have decided to start the test for the second part, at least for January. It's ok to do it a month at a time, but try to make it 12 consecutive months. If you find yourself counting down the days until the test is over, then you are not really passing the test. Non-alcoholic people don't think like that.

    But even if you do pass the second test, it does not negate the first part of the test. It would still be best to abstain permenantly.

    Sorry about the blackouts. I don't know much about them, except that they are not a good sign. You might want to talk to a doctor about it.
     
  13. Sooooo...I think my mind is starting to play tricks on me Lol. I originally said I would stop drinking, completely, but now that I think about it...that may be a stretch. I'm thinking about never being able to enjoy a nice glass of wine or fine martini and it kind of makes me...blah. What if I just drink in moderation (i.e. a martini @ a lounge if I go out w/ my friends) and just not drink solo @ home?? Good idea or bad idea? :D
     
  14. devonian

    devonian Junior Member

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    This is from one of my blogs, sorry it is so long, but I hope it helps. It was not written specifically for you, but addresses your questions very well. The quoted part came from the official text of Alcoholics anonymous, and I have underlined parts that you apply to your questions. The rest is my experience:


    “Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death. We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.” (Pg. 30 Alcoholics Anonymous)

    “Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right- about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!
    Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums - we could increase the list ad infinitum. (Pg. 31, Alcoholics Anonymous)


    The problems starts with our refusal to think we are different than other people. Part of this may be because of the ridicule, often justifiably, that alcoholics are subject to. It may be caused by the belief that we are weak people, which may be true, but often is not. But I believe the main reason is because we like the effect of alcohol, and can’t imagine life without it.
    I remember the first time I got drunk. All the fear was gone. I was able to live with the pain in my life. I became lively and happy. I enjoyed life… even if it only lasted for the evening. The thought that went through my mind was, how do I get more of this, and how do I make sure I don’t run out. Early in my drinking career, I enjoyed my drinking, and it caused few problems for me and others around me. It was a wonderful solution to all my problems. But the problem was, that over time, this solution eventually stopped working. I needed more, and needed it more frequently. As time went on, it no longer worked, and it became a problem itself. But, it still was able to quiet my problems, as long as I remained drunk.
    How could I ever imagine committing myself to a lifetime without having another drink. If I were to admit that I was an alcoholic, I would be admitting that I couldn’t ever have another drink. This thought was depressing. I wanted to prove that I could handle it, by any method I could think of. But they always failed. Fortunately, there is a way to solve this problem. It is easier than many think, and it does not involve forcing ourselves not to drink. The solution causes us to no longer think about drinking. We no longer think about not drinking. Alcohol simply is no longer the preferred solution to our problems.
    So, If having described the physical and mental aspects of alcoholism, you can say “yes” I am like this and would like to find the solution, read the rest of my blogs, or send me a comment.
    The first thing you have to admit is you are powerless over alcohol and that your life has become unmanageable. If you are an alcoholic of this type, you will be like many of us. Either you will go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of your intolerable situation as best you could, or admit it and find a solution.
    My next blog will discuss the types of human power we have tried to overcome our drinking, and what our experiences have been with these methods.
     
  15. devonian

    devonian Junior Member

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    This is a good idea if you are not an alcoholic, but a bad idea if you are an alcoholic.

    I don't believe in telling anyone they are alcoholic, so it is up to you to decide the answer to this question.
     
  16. TheMainException

    TheMainException Senior Veteran

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    I stopped drinking wine for a while...I didn't have the money and it was getting really out of hand...then one night I bought a bottle, downed it...(over a few hours of course) and hardly felt drunk...much like you. I don't get blackouts, but my tolerance hasn't ever gone back down. Some times it does, but only enough to get my a little tipsier than before. It's not cool. I don't hangovers any more either. I used to really just enjoy drinking wine...now I really enjoy gettin drunk off wine as well as enjoying it. So...going back to square one is really where I"d like to be...as I'm sure you would like to be. Abstaining for at least a year is probably the key...if it isn't possible, then help is required.
     
  17. BobW188

    BobW188 Growling Maverick

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    You can try it, but be totally honest with yourself about the results.

    The prospect of never drinking again is intimidating; but it can be done. The regular contributors on this thread probably have more than a century of sober time. Two of us will, God willing, soon reach a combined 50 years: 25 each.
     
  18. Autumnleaf

    Autumnleaf Legend

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    Then you have to watch out for getting a DUI, if you don't stop at just one drink. If you're going to drink its best to do it somewhere you can stay until you are safe to drive again.
     
  19. snail

    snail Junior Member

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    Why do you want to drink in the first place?

    Flavor? Plenty of good flavored non alcohol beverages.

    Relaxation? Try yoga

    Habit? Substitute something else instead of alcohol.

    Your situation sounds like you need a mentor. You are tap dancing with the devil as I read your responses.

    I will just say one great thing to remember. The guy or gal living under the bridge, begging for booze money didn't plan it that way. They thought they were in total control.

    This isn't just about just alcohol either. This is a mindset that progressively gets worse as brain cells are destroyed. Depression, hopelessness etc.

    You have a wonderful online community here, and you need to find that wonderful community close at hand. The point here is not wether you are an alcoholic, but rather that you want better for yourself in life. Seek that out, and not at the bottom of a bottle.

    You are so fortunate to discover this at such and early age.

    Change your playpen and playfriends. You will soon see how good those friends are after you quit drinking. Surround yourself with winners. Seek out spiritual guidance, and take the family along.

    Best wishes
    Dave
     
  20. Wow...that has a lot of similarities. I guess I have something to think about. Hhhmmm.

    I drink b/c I'm bored. If I'm busy, I don't feel the urge to drink...if I'm just sitting around doing nothing...I get EXTREMEMLY bored and feel like having a glass of wine. Also, it may be a habit. In college, we always got together and watched the popular shows (Grey's, American Idol, America's Next Top Model), talk and have wine. Now, that I'm not in college, in some weird way, I still feel programmed to do that. I try to ignore it but it gets the best of me sometimes.

    For instance, today I was REALLY bored and thought, "What the hell!? I'll just go and get a bottle of wine." Mostly, I wanted to have a glass of wine so I wouldn't have to worry about 'not drinking' anymore. Now, I haven't had anything to drink since I said I wasn't going to drink (Jan 1st) but I hate the fact that I can't have something. If I drink, I feel like the pressure is off and I can just go w/ the flow.

    I agree with you...I feel as if I'm tap dancing w/ the devil. I'm trying not to let him win :holy: And, I think I do need a mentor but I don't know where to get one from. I guess I could go to an AA meeting but...I don't know about that; probably not.

    Edit: I don't have drinking friends. Currently, I'm located in a state where I don't really know anyone. It's just me, myself and I. So, this battle is internal. I've gotten good at telling others I'm not going to go out drinking w/ them (although, I never feel like it so it's not that hard to say 'No') so now I'm just trying to get back in a place where I don't have the urge to drink when I'm bored. I feel like God has me in isolation for a reason but I don't know why. Perhaps this is one of the reasons; I need to get my life straight.

    Edit: Why can't I be one of those people who don't feel guilty when they drink? :( I don't even drink half as much as most of my friends but they could care less; they never feel guilty. I guess this is what happens when you're a Christian; God nags you until you give up the stuff He doesn't want you to partake in. Grrr.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 13, 2009