I have the gift of Mercy, but when I take a stand for Christ, people think otherwise

[ValorWoman4Jesus]

I struggle with poor social skills, have a heart of gold who cares about compassion and morality, refusing to budge on either. I care about what's right, just and good. I have the spiritual gift of Mercy I want God's will above all things. However, when I take a stand for Christ, I am seen as a bigot.

I also am recovering from brokenness and unresolved hurts. I was debating whether to put this in the Bi-polar forum, for I am also bi-polar. Right now, I found a church where people are more supportive, helpful and compassionate than previous churches. I confronted a friend and member of my Baptist church about being pro-gay, and she defended her posture and her position as a deacon. Of course she was very offended and said some accusing things to me reminding me of how good she had been to our family including our autistic 5 year old son. I have a goal and calling of peacemaker, but my hurts are such that I am not ready, as I found myself explaining myself as well as defending my posture. I realize my need to care more about people's faithfulness to Christ than to me, but I am in such need of help and support because I am struggling, that I still worry about whether people will accept me. What if she turns the whole church against me and despite the rest of the people being true Christians, they turn against me still. I think about stuff like this like conditional loyalty for example all the time, and it drives me crazy. I so fear rejection and lack of help when we need it most. What if I blew it? I will not compromise where I stand with Christ, but what if I messed up big time? My already broken heart cannot handle the church turning against us, while we are still vulnerable and in need of moral support.

 

[grandvizier1006]

I struggle with poor social skills, have a heart of gold who cares about compassion and morality, refusing to budge on either. I care about what's right, just and good. I have the spiritual gift of Mercy I want God's will above all things. However, when I take a stand for Christ, I am seen as a bigot.

I also am recovering from brokenness and unresolved hurts. I was debating whether to put this in the Bi-polar forum, for I am also bi-polar. Right now, I found a church where people are more supportive, helpful and compassionate than previous churches. I confronted a friend and member of my Baptist church about being pro-gay, and she defended her posture and her position as a deacon. Of course she was very offended and said some accusing things to me reminding me of how good she had been to our family including our autistic 5 year old son. I have a goal and calling of peacemaker, but my hurts are such that I am not ready, as I found myself explaining myself as well as defending my posture. I realize my need to care more about people's faithfulness to Christ than to me, but I am in such need of help and support because I am struggling, that I still worry about whether people will accept me. What if she turns the whole church against me and despite the rest of the people being true Christians, they turn against me still. I think about stuff like this like conditional loyalty for example all the time, and it drives me crazy. I so fear rejection and lack of help when we need it most. What if I blew it? I will not compromise where I stand with Christ, but what if I messed up big time? My already broken heart cannot handle the church turning against us, while we are still vulnerable and in need of moral support.

You know what? I have those exact same fears. I'm actually relieved that someone lived them out for me.

Where I live, pretty much no church would support homosexuality, although I'm quite certain they'd welcome anyone into their churches. Since she was kind to you, her whole reason for affirming homosexuality might come from just a desire to be kind to all people. It's misguided and un-Biblical, but lots of Christians seem to think that being a Christian is just about being nice and making sure everyone around you is happy, and that God supplies that happiness. Just because she's a deacon doesn't make her some infallible authority.

If some so-called Christians will not accept your convictions, despite yours probably being more Biblical than theirs, then it's best to simply ignore the issue and agree to disagree, if possible. You argued your position and she is probably just being stubborn.

I don't think she'll be able to turn the whole church against you. She wouldn't target a person who appears vulnerable just for not approving of homosexuality.

I, too, sometimes get paranoid of being rejected by society at large for this, but the truth is that this probably won't happen. Trust that God has a plan and wouldn't let you suffer without cause. A true Christian wouldn't abandon someone for having views they didn't like.

 

[Catherineanne]

I struggle with poor social skills, have a heart of gold who cares about compassion and morality, refusing to budge on either. I care about what's right, just and good. I have the spiritual gift of Mercy I want God's will above all things. However, when I take a stand for Christ, I am seen as a bigot.

I also am recovering from brokenness and unresolved hurts. I was debating whether to put this in the Bi-polar forum, for I am also bi-polar. Right now, I found a church where people are more supportive, helpful and compassionate than previous churches. I confronted a friend and member of my Baptist church about being pro-gay, and she defended her posture and her position as a deacon. Of course she was very offended and said some accusing things to me reminding me of how good she had been to our family including our autistic 5 year old son. I have a goal and calling of peacemaker, but my hurts are such that I am not ready, as I found myself explaining myself as well as defending my posture. I realize my need to care more about people's faithfulness to Christ than to me, but I am in such need of help and support because I am struggling, that I still worry about whether people will accept me. What if she turns the whole church against me and despite the rest of the people being true Christians, they turn against me still. I think about stuff like this like conditional loyalty for example all the time, and it drives me crazy. I so fear rejection and lack of help when we need it most. What if I blew it? I will not compromise where I stand with Christ, but what if I messed up big time? My already broken heart cannot handle the church turning against us, while we are still vulnerable and in need of moral support.

I would avoid talking about homosexuality with anyone, if I were you.

If you are not gay you cannot understand the issues clearly enough, imo, and you are too vulnerable to cope with falling out with people. Stay on topics you can safely agree on, and avoid those you cannot.

If you absolutely must talk about sin, then start with those you know; your own sins. That is a far safer place for you to focus; for any of us, come to that. Do not try to accuse anyone else of any sin whatever until you have dealt successfully with all of your own. Trust me, nobody wants to hear about their own sins; you will never sound kind taking this approach.

 

[JEBofChristTheLord]

Actually, I would like to encourage ValorWoman4Jesus and grandvizier1006 to discuss the sin of homosexuality with everyone at their church. We do not discuss individual people; but we do encourage each other in the knowledge of what is good and what is evil. I will suggest that if we do not discuss, we do nothing to prevent our church from falling into evil as so many are falling these days. And where there are ignorants in authority in churches, we cannot apply the principle of Matthew 18 unless the highest authorities and many others are in agreement; but we can build general awareness of belief, and where there is belief, the Holy Spirit will lift the entire church out of the sin.

J.E.B.