I have social anxiety

[Jesse2014]

I am not leaving Christianity. I have social anxiety diorder and a narcissistic personality. If one person offends me, then I think everyone is against me. I know it is rediculous. Like yesterday, an associate walked by as he was talking to two guys at the store. I happily yell to him hello. He waves but he did not seem excited to see me. And being an unreasonable, narcissistic person that I am, I think everyone hates me. That is why I was whining about leaving Christianity. Someone offended me on this forum and of course in my mind I am thinking Christians are mean. I don't know how to take offense very well. And just because I got offended, it doesn't mean the person who offended me was wrong.

 

[Bramwell]

Hi Jesse,

I think we all have social anxiety to varying degrees. It can also be heightened depending on the situation and circumstances. Just being able to recognize you have it is the first step to managing it better.

I wouldn't beat yourself up about being a narcissist either. Remember, God's Spirit wants to highlight our problems and convict us to change; but the devil just wants to condemn us without offering a solution. Please don't fall for that trap!

In many ways, the secret to overcoming both problems (social anxiety, and narcissism) is to "get out of ourselves", and focus on loving other people. As we do that, our mind focuses on what is most important - loving God and others. The fruit of that focus (peace, love, and joy) is much better than what we get just thinking about ourselves.

Best of luck!

 

[FanthatSpark]

Blessings Jesse,

It is in hope that we all strive. Calming of the voice inside seems to be where you are at? Labeling the voice as S.A.D or N.P. is the manmade label of the Devourer/Devil . To us, we need a label to address (in our World filled mind) our faults.

The following are "just" suggestions Jess and hold no baring over ones character.

Knowing your enemy. All negativity in that voice is devil spawned. Not your fault, we all have it John 8:44. How "you" respond is what is key. Devil rides along with you at all times to put negative suggestions in all our minds. Yet we label it in psychological terms to how we respond and in the label itself, is negativity in disease. You now "believe" in the disease and that is bad. Not that "you" are bad Jesse but where the focus of your belief resides is in effect, bad, for in your mind there can be no change, (on a drastic scale) for invasion of the Holy Spirit, yet. From your posts the focus is on fear of "What will they think if I, or, what did they think when I". To entertain these thoughts is a foothold for negativity and your thought input leads to output. Read Rom.12-2 where we all are conformed. You are deep in conformity to your labels by that voice in your head that has led your mind astray in all negativity and belief in them. God wants to transform you to love Him first to fix self to transform mind to think in love to shut that voice up inside ones head of fear of what "they" think; to what "you" do in kindness, love. 1 John 4:18.

 

[Jesse2014]

Thank you

 

[Neogaia777]

I am not leaving Christianity. I have social anxiety diorder and a narcissistic personality. If one person offends me, then I think everyone is against me. I know it is rediculous. Like yesterday, an associate walked by as he was talking to two guys at the store. I happily yell to him hello. He waves but he did not seem excited to see me. And being an unreasonable, narcissistic person that I am, I think everyone hates me. That is why I was whining about leaving Christianity. Someone offended me on this forum and of course in my mind I am thinking Christians are mean. I don't know how to take offense very well. And just because I got offended, it doesn't mean the person who offended me was wrong.

I too, have social anxiety disorder, along with being a paranoid scitzophrenic, but I do not have a narcissistic problem, not brag, but I always try to keep my pride in check by clinging to and constantly reminding myself of ideals like humbleness, meekness, mildness, selflessness, generousity, and showing humility (before God)

You are not alone, many of us have disorders that we are in a constant battle with overcoming... Private message me if you ever need to talk privately, ok?

God Bless!

 

[seeingeyes]

I am not leaving Christianity. I have social anxiety diorder and a narcissistic personality. If one person offends me, then I think everyone is against me. I know it is rediculous. Like yesterday, an associate walked by as he was talking to two guys at the store. I happily yell to him hello. He waves but he did not seem excited to see me. And being an unreasonable, narcissistic person that I am, I think everyone hates me. That is why I was whining about leaving Christianity. Someone offended me on this forum and of course in my mind I am thinking Christians are mean. I don't know how to take offense very well. And just because I got offended, it doesn't mean the person who offended me was wrong.

Have you been diagnosed with these things? Honestly, I've never seen anyone with narcissistic personality disorder admit that they could be the one in the wrong, so you are probably just dealing with garden-variety pride like the rest of us. But that's a good thing! Pride can be healed. NPD has no good treatment.

I have a friend with extreme anxiety (as in: she leaves a message, doesn't get an immediate call-back, and spirals into depression and doesn't leave the house for days), but in the last few years, with medication, journaling, and a lot of self examination, she has made enormous strides in this battle. She's like a whole new woman, it's incredible. She's still anxious, but she is no longer crippled by it. It doesn't control her anymore.

So don't give up! What do you think is the next step is in dealing with this?

 

[Gunny]

I am not leaving Christianity. I have social anxiety diorder and a narcissistic personality. If one person offends me, then I think everyone is against me. I know it is rediculous. Like yesterday, an associate walked by as he was talking to two guys at the store. I happily yell to him hello. He waves but he did not seem excited to see me. And being an unreasonable, narcissistic person that I am, I think everyone hates me. That is why I was whining about leaving Christianity. Someone offended me on this forum and of course in my mind I am thinking Christians are mean. I don't know how to take offense very well. And just because I got offended, it doesn't mean the person who offended me was wrong.

My fellow brother in Christ, our human condition can be at times very painful.

I was diagnosed with PTSD and major depression many years ago. Jesus rescued me and delivered me from the bondage of alcoholism in 1983. I experienced many panic attacks for 1-2 years after my drinking alcohol ceased. Depression followed along with the PTSD issues.

Over the years Abba Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit has been transforming/changing me (peeling back layer after layer of wounding inside my heart and spirit). I never cease to be amazed by the love, grace, mercy, kindness and tenderness of the Lord towards me in spite of myself (weakness and failures). The number one thing God has shown me through His Word (especially in the Psalms learning from the poet, warrior, king-David) is that when I hurt and/or fall short of the glory of God I run to God vs. run away-which doesn't work very well in my walk with Jesus.

Especially in the last 5-7 years Abba Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, has been revealing to me (from the Word and sound teaching/preaching) how much my heavenly Father loves me and I am precious to Him.

The Lord has been showing me to think about myself as He thinks of me. Also, to think about other people as He does-with the love (agape) of Christ.

 

[tremble]

Good job with the confession. Admitting that there is a problem and talking about it with others can be super helpful in overcoming those problems. Just remember that this is the internet, where the whole world can see. Think carefully about what you confess to and who you confess it to.

 

[Jesse2014]

Have you been diagnosed with these things? Honestly, I've never seen anyone with narcissistic personality disorder admit that they could be the one in the wrong, so you are probably just dealing with garden-variety pride like the rest of us. But that's a good thing! Pride can be healed. NPD has no good treatment.

I have a friend with extreme anxiety (as in: she leaves a message, doesn't get an immediate call-back, and spirals into depression and doesn't leave the house for days), but in the last few years, with medication, journaling, and a lot of self examination, she has made enormous strides in this battle. She's like a whole new woman, it's incredible. She's still anxious, but she is no longer crippled by it. It doesn't control her anymore.

So don't give up! What do you think is the next step is in dealing with this?

That's a good question. That is something I have to figure out. If you have any suggestions, I am ears.

 

[Jesse2014]

Good job with the confession. Admitting that there is a problem and talking about it with others can be super helpful in overcoming those problems. Just remember that this is the internet, where the whole world can see. Think carefully about what you confess to and who you confess it to.

Thank you for for the advice. I have made mistakes in the past of sharing too much information.

 

[Jesse2014]

Thank you Gunny for sharing. I may need to try that mindset.

 

[seeingeyes]

That's a good question. That is something I have to figure out. If you have any suggestions, I am ears.

Well, getting a therapist can really help, if you are able. Someone that you can talk to without worrying about judgement. Ask around and get some references.

If you feel like the anxiety is sort of...separate from you, like part of your brain is saying things that you don't really believe when you consider it, then medication may be a good option. Medication takes time and tweaking, though, so you'd want to find a doc that you trust.

But today, start keeping a journal. Every time you feel snubbed, write down what happened and how you feel about it. Then in a few days, when your brain calms down and you are looking at the event more objectively, write down your new thoughts about the matter (exactly like you did here in these last two threads). Soon enough, you'll have a clear record of your own patterns that may help you determine what the best next step is.

God bless

 

[RBPerry]

That's a good question. That is something I have to figure out. If you have any suggestions, I am ears.

Jesse, an open forum is really not the place to work through issues no matter what they may be. I don't like putting labels on people and I sense that you or someone has miss diagnosed you. Seek out a professional Christian therapist, if you pm me I might be able to find someone to help you.

God Bless you.

 

[Gunny]

Good job with the confession. Admitting that there is a problem and talking about it with others can be super helpful in overcoming those problems. Just remember that this is the internet, where the whole world can see. Think carefully about what you confess to and who you confess it to.

Amen and Amen. Holy Spirit discernment between testimony vs. confession; although they are at times woven together.

 

[gerbilwoman]

I have social anxiety as well, can be quite difficult. Have you checked about CF's mental health forums? May be helpful. Remember, you are not alone. Wishing you well.