How Is A Christian Lady Supposed to Dress?

[emekrus]

Well for me, I like to look like the time of the bible. Because I don't want to miss heaven for any reason. Hence, I broke a relationship I kept for over a year with the plan for marriage simply because of make up, artificial hairdo, inspite of the fact that we loved each other dearly. Though within the period it lasted, there was no hugs or kisses let alone sex.

 

[timewerx]

Well for me, I like to look like the time of the bible. Because I don't want to miss heaven for any reason. Hence, I broke a relationship I kept for over a year with the plan for marriage simply because of make up, artificial hairdo, inspite of the fact that we loved each other dearly. Though within the period it lasted, there was no hugs or kisses let alone sex.

I think you have a big underlying problems with women.

You can hug and kiss women without feeling any lust. Besides, nothing in the Bible says you can't hug nor kiss any women. What is bad is lust and fornication/adultery. You must be confusing hugs and kisses with lust but no, lust doesn't need to be there.

Being a Christian is not about struggling to suppress unwanted urges, it is having God change our very natures.

Because if you are simply suppressing your urges and running away from temptations and telling women to cover much of their distinguishing features, then probably, your sinful nature has not been changed yet. Or you have other issues with women.

I would tell women to obscure their features for their safety to avoid being harassed but not because their sexiness is giving me a hard time, it does not by the Grace of God!

 

[Rajni]

In looking closer at 1 Timothy 2:9-10, it seems that
the kind of modesty being addressed is not one of
avoiding minimal coverage, but rather of avoiding the
flaunting of one's riches. In other words, the
exhortation seems to be about dressing plainly rather
than flashily.

Then there's the fact that there are cultures in which
women wear next to nothing, and without causing the
ripple-effects the modesty-doctrine is concerned about.
It's when the forbidden-fruit-factor is introduced into
something that the problems seem to arise.



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[emekrus]

I think you have a big underlying problems with women.

You can hug and kiss women without feeling any lust. Besides, nothing in the Bible says you can't hug nor kiss any women. What is bad is lust and fornication/adultery. You must be confusing hugs and kisses with lust but no, lust doesn't need to be there.

Being a Christian is not about struggling to suppress unwanted urges, it is having God change our very natures.

Because if you are simply suppressing your urges and running away from temptations and telling women to cover much of their distinguishing features, then probably, your sinful nature has not been changed yet. Or you have other issues with women.

I would tell women to obscure their features for their safety to avoid being harassed but not because their sexiness is giving me a hard time, it does not by the Grace of God!

My brother, I'm one kind of a Christian that likes being real. I don't like pretense. I've discovered that when you're in an emotional relationship with a lady you are physically attracted to, you naturally lust after her. And any form of touch, will be creating more and more lure to fornication. Hence, I limited my contacts with her to side contacts (like hand on the shoulder). I figured that anything more than that could break our disciplinary hold on ourselves.

Yes it is true that if you have been transformed as a Christian, lust feelings will be taken out of you. But when you get attracted to a lady and you in a relationship with her, believe it or yes-even if you're born again or not, you're bound to lust after her. So its just wisdom to avoid even the seemingly lawful contacts in order to avoid the ultimate sin of fornication (I know what I'm saying from experiences).

Then about me wanting them to cover up themselves, well, its just that I have a gospel of Holiness committed to me to preach by God. And of course, I want to be a perfect example of what I preach. I can't be preaching another thing and my wife is doing another thing. For instance, I do uphold everything that book of 1 Timothy says. Hence, I won't marry a lady that her looks does not conform 100% to what that scripture describes as modesty.

In that scripture, the apostle's terms of modesty, was clearly defined. Except that people want to give it their special touch in order to suit their individual styles. The scripture defines modesty to be: Modest apparel,Not with braided(plaited) hair, Not with Gold (standing for anything of metallic content), pearl and the rest... Hence, I won't want to marry any lady whose appearance is in aberration to those injunctions. Hence, I asked her to stop making up, stop wearing jewelries, stop wearing artificial hairdos. Though she tried to stop them, but she had gotten so attached to them, that she couldn't permanently let them go, hence I had to let the relationship break up. And until now, I'm still prayerfully searching for the lady that conforms to that scripture 100% to marry...

And I believe that very soon by the special grace of God, I'll find her.

 

[emekrus]

In looking closer at 1 Timothy 2:9-10, it seems that
the kind of modesty being addressed is not one of
avoiding minimal coverage, but rather of avoiding the
flaunting of one's riches. In other words, the
exhortation seems to be about dressing plainly rather
than flashily.

Then there's the fact that there are cultures in which
women wear next to nothing, and without causing the
ripple-effects the modesty-doctrine is concerned about.
It's when the forbidden-fruit-factor is introduced into
something that the problems seem to arise.

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My dear sister Chaela, all that are what the scripture seems to you. But I think it will be safer if we take it for exactly what it says and not what it seems 'individually'. Many people may have their own opinion of what it seems but yet it says only one thing. And that thing is exactly what it says.

 

[timewerx]

Yes it is true that if you have been transformed as a Christian, lust feelings will be taken out of you. But when you get attracted to a lady and you in a relationship with her, believe it or yes-even if you're born again or not, you're bound to lust after her. So its just wisdom to avoid even the seemingly lawful contacts in order to avoid the ultimate sin of fornication (I know what I'm saying from experiences).

I used to have that problem but not anymore. I know exactly how it feels to have random men lusting over you, including unsolicited touches even if they are hiding it - that awkward feeling. It's annoying, makes your blood boil! The "golden rule" applies here. Naturally, that lust will go away over time if your thoughts are in the right place, you'll just have to be patient.

Why can't you just humbly ask God for help? Don't assume the change will take overnight, it will take some time, like years, etc.

In that scripture, the apostle's terms of modesty, was clearly defined. Except that people want to give it their special touch in order to suit their individual styles. The scripture defines modesty to be: Modest apparel,Not with braided(plaited) hair, Not with Gold (standing for anything of metallic content), pearl and the rest... Hence, I won't want to marry any lady whose appearance is in aberration to those injunctions. Hence, I asked her to stop making up, stop wearing jewelries, stop wearing artificial hairdos. Though she tried to stop them, but she had gotten so attached to them, that she couldn't permanently let them go, hence I had to let the relationship break up. And until now, I'm still prayerfully searching for the lady that conforms to that scripture 100% to marry...

Well, I just hope, you'll keep your sanity and away from temptation until you find such lady!

 

[timewerx]

My dear sister Chaela, all that are what the scripture seems to you. But I think it will be safer if we take it for exactly what it says and not what it seems 'individually'. Many people may have their own opinion of what it seems but yet it says only one thing. And that thing is exactly what it says.

I think me and Chaela agreed on the same thing. There are indeed some cultures who wear next to nothing and have no lust issues.

I'm not saying it's okay to wear next to nothing out in the streets of New York - it will be quite unsafe to do so!

Coverage and sometimes, the expense itself can be subjective things. For example, the ancient Mayan and Inca cultures wore precious metals like gold extensively and in abundance because gold was dirt cheap in their society!

Of course, it would be disturbing to find someone with lots of gold on themselves today, but in ancient Mexicans, it was ordinary.

Many things in the Bible are actually subjective, else, we'll still believe the Earth is flat and is the center of the Universe and that many psychological issues are caused by evil spirits.

I don't think it's okay to interpret the Bible under a very limited perspective - you'll have to consider everything because the Bible is not made for Middle Eastern / Semitic peoples only!

 

[Messy]

I used to have that problem but not anymore. I know exactly how it feels to have random men lusting over you, including unsolicited touches even if they are hiding it - that awkward feeling. It's annoying, makes your blood boil! The "golden rule" applies here. Naturally, that lust will go away over time if your thoughts are in the right place, you'll just have to be patient.

Why can't you just humbly ask God for help? Don't assume the change will take overnight, it will take some time, like years, etc.




Well, I just hope, you'll keep your sanity and away from temptation until you find such lady!

I think that's quite normal. Better pray for a good wife. If you feel nothing better not marry that person. I'm glad I'm not a man. It's insane, a visiting pastor here said he got lust thoughts because of a stupid underwear billboard and needed someone to pray to get rid of it. I'm glad I don't get bombarded by that stuff.
My ex even had to ask women that had a matrimony and he had to marry them to put on a jacket during the service. I saw a guy here complain that he couldn't concentrate on the service because of how the ladies who did the worship dressed.

 

[timewerx]

I think that's quite normal. Better pray for a good wife. If you feel nothing better not marry that person. I'm glad I'm not a man. It's insane, a visiting pastor here said he got lust thoughts because of a stupid underwear billboard and needed someone to pray to get rid of it. I'm glad I don't get bombarded by that stuff.
My ex even had to ask women that had a matrimony and he had to marry them to put on a jacket during the service. I saw a guy here complain that he couldn't concentrate on the service because of how the ladies who did the worship dressed.

Being in love is different from being in lust!

If I were to be re-born on this Earth, I'd rather be a woman too!! But hopefully, in a 1st world, democratic nation. 3rd world and Islamic nations are not good for women! They have serious issues with equality and safety of women!

Anyway, I don't go to church so I have no complaints!

 

[timewerx]

To all men, struggling with lust issues, a lot of it has to do with testosterone. And testosterone also leads men to be aggressive and reckless which generally makes them more dangerous behind the wheel and fill up prisons 10x more than women according to statistics.

This is not rocket science... If you want to solve lust and aggression issues, better lower that testosterone.......naturally!!

One way is through the foods you eat. Red meat increases testosterone levels. A higher proportion of vegetables or going 100% vegetarian should significantly reduce testosterone levels on your body.

I'd rather ask men to reduce red meat consumption and have more vegetables than ask women put on more clothes. Because less testosterone means less lust, and also less accidents on the road and less likely to hurt anyone, less crime, it's a win-win situation!!!

 

[Rajni]

My dear sister Chaela, all that are what the scripture seems to you. But I think it will be safer if we take it for exactly what it says and not what it seems 'individually'. Many people may have their own opinion of what it seems but yet it says only one thing. And that thing is exactly what it says.

Which is why I pointed out what the scripture actually says.
It's speaking of fancy hairstyles and flashy ornamentation,
not coverage.

Look at the verse again:

"In like manner, that women adorn themselves in
modest apparel, with shamefastness and sobriety;
not with braided hair, and gold or pearls or
costly raiment; 10 but (which becometh women
professing godliness) through good works."​

The things to be avoided are mentioned in detail,
and they have nothing to do with exposed flesh.
I repeat, there are cultures in which women wear
next to nothing, and without incident.

Frankly, I find this whole issue makes men out to
be weak, if how a woman dresses can topple them
so easily.


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[AphroditeGoneAwry]

Which is why I pointed out what the scripture actually says.
It's speaking of fancy hairstyles and flashy ornamentation,
not coverage.

Look at the verse again:

"In like manner, that women adorn themselves in
modest apparel, with shamefastness and sobriety;
not with braided hair, and gold or pearls or
costly raiment; 10 but (which becometh women
professing godliness) through good works."​

The things to be avoided are mentioned in detail,
and they have nothing to do with exposed flesh.
I repeat, there are cultures in which women wear
next to nothing, and without incident.

Frankly, I find this whole issue makes men out to
be weak, if how a woman dresses can topple them
so easily.


-

Look at the verse (above) again.

How about now?

I doubt Paul meant it was necessary to cover your head and be cautious with adornments, but okay to bare your breast and thigh; which the words 'modest', 'shamefastness', and 'sobriety' indicate.

 

[Rajni]

Look at the verse (above) again.

How about now?

I doubt Paul meant it was necessary to cover your head and be cautious with adornments, but okay to bare your breast and thigh; which the words 'modest', 'shamefastness', and 'sobriety' indicate.

Maybe, maybe not.

Paul's line of thinking seems to be dominated by
showing off one's wealth as opposed to skin.
Perhaps the latter was already a given.

And I repeat, yet again, there are cultures where such
exposure doesn't cause problems. If Paul was
preaching specifically against skimpy attire, he was
doing so out of ignorance of said cultures.

Not only that, but he would also be guilty of making
what his culture undoubtedly saw as The Stronger Sex
look incredibly weak, if the way a woman dresses is all
it takes to make the stronger ones stumble.

It's what comes out of a man that defiles him, not what
goes in.


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[AphroditeGoneAwry]

If you study Paul, you will see it in its proper context I think.

What you are saying is a bit preposterous, no offense intended.

 

[timewerx]

Look at the verse (above) again.

How about now?

I doubt Paul meant it was necessary to cover your head and be cautious with adornments, but okay to bare your breast and thigh; which the words 'modest', 'shamefastness', and 'sobriety' indicate.

If you know Apostle Paul well, he made many teachings regarding fitting in or integrating with different cultures.

How well you cover yourself - that mostly depended on the acceptable (dignified) clothing practices of the culture or country or city.

I doubt that Paul meant that a Middle Eastern Christian woman should wear traditional Arabic clothing while walking around New York....."When in Rome, do as the Romans do" is what he would have said.

This is why Paul did not specify how well to cover yourself because this is subjective and depends on the culture you're in, just like Chaela said.....Obviously, it's gonna be really out of place if you wore New York sexy dress in one of Arabic nations and most likely, you'll end up in big trouble for doing so!

 

[Rajni]

What you are saying is a bit preposterous, no offense intended

Which part in particular came across as preposterous?

ETA: Don't get me wrong, I personally don't strive to
dress skimpily. In fact, I've pretty much resolved
never to wear a bathing-suit again simply because I
don't feel comfortable in them anymore. I don't even
wear shorts nowadays, either...
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-

 

[emekrus]

To all men, struggling with lust issues, a lot of it has to do with testosterone. And testosterone also leads men to be aggressive and reckless which generally makes them more dangerous behind the wheel and fill up prisons 10x more than women according to statistics.

This is not rocket science... If you want to solve lust and aggression issues, better lower that testosterone.......naturally!!

One way is through the foods you eat. Red meat increases testosterone levels. A higher proportion of vegetables or going 100% vegetarian should significantly reduce testosterone levels on your body.

I'd rather ask men to reduce red meat consumption and have more vegetables than ask women put on more clothes. Because less testosterone means less lust, and also less accidents on the road and less likely to hurt anyone, less crime, it's a win-win situation!!!

My dear, it is not struggling matter. It is natural that if you are in a relationship, you'll lust. And that is, either male or female. The wisdom is to play safe by all means to avoid fornication before marriage. Ask any body you know have been in an intimate relationship. Even if the person is Christian. It is not a testosterone issue.

 

[emekrus]

Which part in particular came across as preposterous?

ETA: Don't get me wrong, I personally don't strive to
dress skimpily. In fact, I've pretty much resolved
never to wear a bathing-suit again simply because I
don't feel comfortable in them anymore. I don't even
wear shorts nowadays, either...
-



-

Well, Chaela, I suggest you check up the meaning of 'modest' again in your dictionary.

 

[Messy]

My dear, it is not struggling matter. It is natural that if you are in a relationship, you'll lust. And that is, either male or female. The wisdom is to play safe by all means to avoid fornication before marriage. Ask any body you know have been in an intimate relationship. Even if the person is Christian. It is not a testosterone issue.

They weren't supposed to not touch them and wear a veil for nothing.

 

[timewerx]

My dear, it is not struggling matter. It is natural that if you are in a relationship, you'll lust. And that is, either male or female. The wisdom is to play safe by all means to avoid fornication before marriage. Ask any body you know have been in an intimate relationship. Even if the person is Christian. It is not a testosterone issue.

First of all, do you really know what a Christian Wedding is??

The exchange of vows, rings, wedding cake, gowns, shower, entourage, etc, etc, is not a Christian Wedding, that's a Pagan Wedding which originated from the Ancient Roman Empire (NOT the Roman Catholic Church!) and possibly coming all the way back from ancient Babylon.

How does a woman become your wife then??? Through a pagan wedding?? Just by having sex with her?? Just by having a committed relationship with her??

Please let us know the details if you ever find it from the Bible!