Zeeboe

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Since I was 12-years old, I've always been a very depressed, unhappy person. But then in 2006, I became a Christian and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly happy. But towards the end of the year, I slowly began to lose faith. I was always trying to be the perfect Christian, I went to a church but never joined one and got frustrated whenever life didn't go my way and only saw the negative that is in religion. I eventually got burned out on religion and now I am how I used to be: An unhappy, lazy human being who is always sad or angry and an atheist at heart.

Please pray that Christ comes back into my life.
 

baruch4

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Since I was 12-years old, I've always been a very depressed, unhappy person. But then in 2006, I became a Christian and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly happy. But towards the end of the year, I slowly began to lose faith. I was always trying to be the perfect Christian, I went to a church but never joined one and got frustrated whenever life didn't go my way and only saw the negative that is in religion. I eventually got burned out on religion and now I am how I used to be: An unhappy, lazy human being who is always sad or angry who is an atheist at heart.

Please pray that Christ comes back into my life.
praying, with tks to the lord our redeemer of the spirit, the soul n the body, in christ jesus name n will.

121:1 I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
121:2 My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.
121:3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
121:4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
121:5 The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.
121:6 The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.
121:7 The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.
121:8 The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

amen
 
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peacechild4

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Since I was 12-years old, I've always been a very depressed, unhappy person. But then in 2006, I became a Christian and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly happy. But towards the end of the year, I slowly began to lose faith. I was always trying to be the perfect Christian, I went to a church but never joined one and got frustrated whenever life didn't go my way and only saw the negative that is in religion. I eventually got burned out on religion and now I am how I used to be: An unhappy, lazy human being who is always sad or angry who is an atheist at heart.

Please pray that Christ comes back into my life.

Hi Zeeboe...

The good news is.. depression is under the blood and you experienced that for a time.. Praise God \0/

Religion never satisfies does it.. my hubby got burned with that part.. and so far he has not returned either..

Religion is in the head.. but God wants the whole man and the Holy Spirit can fill every part!!

Dear brother.. you must not look with your head.. but focus with your heart.. God wants to show you so much more then you experienced before.. not just deliverance from depression.. but a way to walk that will so fill you that You go out and show others that way to walk too!!

We can never be perfect in ourselves.. that is impossible.. that is perhaps why you failed.. but God is perfect.. and to be totally led and filled by Him.. will show you a way to walk where the things that once troubled you are no longer a problem..

A heart that is filled by God.. knows nothing else but God..

Faith cannot be lost.. it is birthed from Gods word.. the truth of God.. and it grows like a seed.. But if you want that seed to grow.. you must water it.. and nuture it.. and protect it..

Faith comes by hearing.. and hearing by the Word of God..

I think you really really want God.. and came here because of the unmet desires in Your heart to have His fullness in You..

God will meet those desires.. just call on Him and He will save You.. Tell Him you want Him.. and Him alone.. and invite Him into every part of You.. and seek Him and His Word and be filled with His Spirit so that you can receive all He has to give you..

I will pray.. Bless your heart..
 
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FoundInGrace

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Since I was 12-years old, I've always been a very depressed, unhappy person. But then in 2006, I became a Christian and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly happy. But towards the end of the year, I slowly began to lose faith. I was always trying to be the perfect Christian, I went to a church but never joined one and got frustrated whenever life didn't go my way and only saw the negative that is in religion. I eventually got burned out on religion and now I am how I used to be: An unhappy, lazy human being who is always sad or angry who is an atheist at heart.

Please pray that Christ comes back into my life.

Father,
Thank you for Zeeboe, that he has known your peace in the past. Please help Zeeboe in his search for you at this time, please help him find you again, find your truth, find peace again in you. Thank you Father that you are full of forgiveness and love and you welcome us back with open arms and I pray Zeeboe would know this again. Please surround him at this time with the assurance of your reality and that you are drawing him to you and only want the best for him in this life you have given him. Thank you that you never turn us away Father, in Jesus name, amen.
 
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peacechild4

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Father,
Thank you for Zeeboe, that he has known your peace in the past. Please help Zeeboe in his search for you at this time, please help him find you again, find your truth, find peace again in you. Thank you Father that you are full of forgiveness and love and you welcome us back with open arms and I pray Zeeboe would know this again. Please surround him at this time with the assurance of your reality and that you are drawing him to you and only want the best for him in this life you have given him. Thank you that you never turn us away Father, in Jesus name, amen.

Amen.. I stand in agrement..
 
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LadyMarion52

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Since I was 12-years old, I've always been a very depressed, unhappy person. But then in 2006, I became a Christian and for the first time in a long time, I felt truly happy. But towards the end of the year, I slowly began to lose faith. I was always trying to be the perfect Christian, I went to a church but never joined one and got frustrated whenever life didn't go my way and only saw the negative that is in religion. I eventually got burned out on religion and now I am how I used to be: An unhappy, lazy human being who is always sad or angry who is an atheist at heart.

Please pray that Christ comes back into my life.
Lord Jesus please help this young man. Touch his life and make him whole. Lord show him truth and give him joy again. Revive him in Jesus Name Amen
 
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restore

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depression will come and go, back and forth, it is not lazy...seek some professional help or talk to other people who recoverd.
and father God is with u even if u feel u r so unperfect etc, u r always the best in God eyes, cuz u r His son, Jesus even died for u. and in time comes u will shout of joy again, do not worry, cuz the lord will fight for u. :wave:
 
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jfhlove

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A Christian: You believe that Jesus died on the cross for your sins, and arose on the third day and is preparing a place to receive Him that where He is you shall be also.You accept Him as Lord and Savior and repent and believe this. Now you are like a baby...as a baby needs the milk and nourishment to grow, so does a new Christian need the "milk" The WORD OF GOD the BIBLE. Also, you need to find a church that you can speak to someone one on one who will help you find the way. God will NOT leave you or FORSAKE you. You are HIS CHILD!! Just think of what that means!! He dies FOR YOU, so don't give up. You just need someone to guide you through your NEW life...just make sure that you go to a church that preaches the Bible and seek someone to talk with. I promise you, you will be so happier than you ever thought. You just need to READ and PRAY to your HEAVENLY FATHER....He is always there to guide you. JFH
 
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Zeeboe

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Okay, it's time for me to rant. Thank you for the posts and prayers but now I have something to write.

A lot of you are Christian, but that is because that is what your parents told you when you were very young was the right religion and I live in the United States of America where Christianly is a very popular religion. However if you all were raised in China, you'd all probably Buddhist. Or if you were raised in the middle east, you'd most likely be Muslims. So it all depends where one is raised that decides their religion.

And it's true I could be wrong, but what if you are all wrong about the Christian religion and that it was not the right path to God. Maybe Judaism is the way to God and you're all going to burn in Hell for following a false prophet. The truth is, Christians are just at risk of burning in Hell forever as atheists are

I just feel like religion is holding me back. What if it is all fake and we are wasting our lives? Instead of obsessing over where we're gonna be when we die, what's wrong with living for today? And enjoying the great things about the earth?

My parents are human and they are not always right, but because some book says I have to honor them, I'm supposed to go along with everything they say, even if they are wrong?

And I am only a human being and God supposedly put the desire to mate inside me and yet I'm not allowed to look at a attractive young woman and think she is pretty because that's a sin.

I'm not allowed to go drink beer, get drunk, have fun and party because it's a sin.

I tried to follow the rules last year and it made me crazy. Anytime I did sin, I felt guilty...kinda like how I feel guilty when I cheat on my diet and I'm tired of that.

I also have learning disabilities that have really screwed my life up and have pretty much ruined it and made me what I am today, and yet I am just supposed to shut up and accept the hand I'm dealt? What about those people who have ir worst then me? The blind? The deaf? The physically and mentally handicapped? People that are born deformed? What did those poor people do to deserve what they got?

And what about homosexuals? Despite what many rednecks think, you are born gay. And yet they are not allowed to enjoy their lives and are told they are gonna burn forever. They could be good people, and yet they are treated worst then trash by Christians.

And what about women? The bible treats women like they are just slaves. Women are supposed to go along with what their husbands say, even if it is wrong. That's not right.

And of course, because I am defending gays and women I am sure many people here will think I am gay, well I am not.


And I feel so sorry for kids who aren't allowed to go trick-or-treating on Halloween because their Christian parents tell them it's the night of Satan...I mean even from a Christian point of view, I ask..why give Satan power? Halloween is only Satan's night if you allow it to be. Don't let Halloween be Satan's night and don't give the colors of red and black to Satan either. That's how I see it.

Same deal with Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. There are kids out there who will never get to enjoy those characters because their Christian parents tell them those characters are of the Devil who is trying to take the spotlight away from Christ.

And another thing, sorry to say this...but I don't think Christians are very real. They're so happy all the time and act so shocked and offended whenever something that doesn't fit into their Norman Rockwell way of life comes along. Life is hard and is full of pain and yet Christians act like everything is wonderful. And it seems to me that if you're Christian, you can't truly enjoy your life and your whole life revolves around some old book that is most likely not true...and if it isn't, then you all have wasted your entire lives when you could have been out having fun and yes, even "sinning" a little.

I studied religion A LOT last year. I studied a lot of religions, especially the Christian religion and I am 24-years old. I'm not some gullible little child here who's gonna believe fairy tales about a man being swallowed alive inside a whale or stories about talking snakes or 12 foot giants or people living to be 500 years old or burning bushes or the story of Noah and the ark or about a man raising from the dead....without having a few questions to ask. They all sound like fairy tales meant to teach people lessons about life. We're all adults here...most of us anyway and do you all honestly believe that those things happened on this very earth we live in now?

I think some of the stories in the bible are true, others are not. I think many of the authors of the true stories really stretched the truth a lot. Like I think the story of David and Goliath may be true, but I doubt Goliath was 12 feet tall.

In closing, I just think religion was invented to keep people in line and to conform and do as they are told. I also think it was made up by a bunch of redneck tough guy men and that is why being gay is a sin and why women are just supposed to obey the man. And the men wrote in the bible that if we didn't all just do as we are told, we'll burn in Hell forever and ever. But if we obey, we go to Heaven where everything is just perfect forever and ever............

Sounds like something off the Disney channel to me and it sounds like a big con to me to get people to do as they are told...just like Santa Claus was invented to get kids to do as they were told.

People back in the olden days were more gullible then people today, so they'd believe anything, but in this day and age...people should know better now.
 
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Criada

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This is a prayer thread, so I can't discuss all that.
No - that's not a cop-out -will PM you later(I'm about to go to work now!).
But - I am praying for you!
And God loves you - enough to die for you, even if you don't believe in him.

God bless you!
 
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Zeeboe

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Hmm. No new posts. What a shocker. Just when I thought I had finally reached the last step and giving up on this belief...here I am again...but not with any good news to report.

Soon after the last post, I removed all Christian related sites from my favorites, I changed my religion on my myspace, I study atheism more, I stopped saying a blessing before meals and I was ready to finally accept the fact that I was an atheist. I even started posting on an atheist message board.

Even before becoming an atheist and just having struggles with my religion...I had become a very unhappy, depressed and angry human being. I was so much more happy as a Christian.

Anyway, earlier tonight...for no reason at all, I started watching episodes of the Way of the Master on you tube and the videos spoke to me...I used to love Way of the Master...it's been a long time since I watched it..anyway....I felt good again. I thought God was speaking to me. I felt like a Christian again. I thought people prayed for me and the prayers were being answered.

Well, it's 5:41 AM, Austin, Texas time and I have been up all night. Almost two hours ago, I needed to talk to someone though. Over the phone and have a chat with them.

I attempted to call a few prayer hotlines. The first one I called rang forever and no one answered. The second one I called didn't have anyone available so I was told via recording to wait and I did. Then the recording came back and told me that due to all the other calls coming in, no one could talk....so I had to listen to a boring recording for three minutes with this redneck sounding guy rambling on about the bible....then I was hung up on. I thought I'd have to wait again but nope...after the recording I was hung up.

The third number I called I finally got an answer. It was the Church Channel's hotline. The person sounded like some overly religious old southern black woman. I was asked my name and I told the woman and she responded "Gilson??" in a strange tone of voice. I am used to people giving me a hard time about my name or responding the same way the woman did when I tell people my name but I expected Christians to be a little bit more mature and nice about it...

Anyway, I asked the woman if this was just a prayer hotline or if it was okay to talk to. She said it was just a prayer hot line a rude tone of voice like she was annoyed.

I told the women what I needed a prayer for. And then I was told to hold...and I could hear her typing and mumbling to herself. I guess she was having trouble finding the script...

She said the prayer and it all sounded like she was reading from a script...

Then she asked me about the church I went to and I told her and then she rudely and sarcastically told me maybe I needed to pay attention a little more in church.
And if I did, I wouldn't have this problem.

The atheist that is growing inside me wanted to say....

"That's what I did my whole life you! And it was the nonsense they were preaching that made me lose
my faith!"

But the Christian in me turned the other cheek and I just told her I was never involved in church groups and maybe I should go back and give it a try and maybe the people there can help me.

I also don't think she understood what I was talking about. She made it seem like I was a Christian who just got lazy and was tired of going to church. And I would have gladly debated with her a little and told her my concerns...even though I already said it a few times....but I felt very rushed whenever I had a chance to speak.

I talked more with her and she acted like she was annoyed by me and I could even hear her laugh and try not to laugh sometimes when I told her of my concerns.

The call ended and I don't know..she just sounded amused like she was waiting to get off the phone with me so she could laugh or something. I don't know what I said that was funny. Could it be my weird name? It's not that funny is it?

I just wanted someone to talk to. I needed help. There was no one for me to turn to. So I went to the people who I thought I could always turn to, 24 hours a day.....and I got nothing. I heard a prayer for me that has probably been said a million times and then I was treated with no respect or compassion and I was laughed at.

I tried calling the other hotlines a few more times but got nowhere.

In the end, I ended up on bended knees praying in my empty garage in the dead of the night...begging God for His help......I want so badly to believe in God...but after this experience.......I don't know. I guess haven't really let go of God yet.

Despite all the evidence, I still am having trouble letting go.
 
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Zeeboe

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I am doing a lot better. A LOT. I can't even describe it. I don't know how to! It can't be described.

I wanted my proof and I got it. I plan on calling into Todd Friel's show at one point to tell him about it because weeks before hand I called in and had a little debate with him on his radio show and now I gotta share with him my praise report.
 
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restore

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I was wondering if i was finally an athiest and same time struggling suicidal thoughts two years ago, i also called hotlines for prayer and i was doing long international call even. Also got the same thing as u posted.
but I m happy cuz my eyes r open now...

Lord it is such a long way, full of stones and valleys, I ask u to hold on this child who is seeking, we r all seekers, but if he is seeking, he will find, and u will let him see, eyes open,In your time and your ways for him, thank u , in Jesus name, amen
 
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