Does God want us to love ourselves?

[stormdancer0]

In answer to your question, I agree with the other posts: YES, God wants you to love yourself. And He loves your kids, and I don't think staying with an abusive man is good for them. It is your decision. But either way, God loves you.

How can you be a nobody? Think of this.

God, Almighty maker of the entire universe, from the biggest galaxies to the smallest electrons, has one Son. The apple of His eye, His only heir, literally a part of Him.

Looking down at the earth, not just right now, but through-out space and time, He narrowed His search down, and chose YOU to be betrothed to His Son. No matter what your life was like growing up, no matter what it's like right now, if you are a Christian, you are part of the bride of Christ. You are chosen to be betrothed to the Son of the Living God.

Not only that, but God has declared, "I am your Father." He is your perfect Father, who does not hurt or abuse or ignore you, but has His vision rested on you at all times, and (get this) He has your name, YOUR NAME, tattooed onto the palm of His hand.

He has built you a mansion that makes the white house look like an outhouse. He has planted blooming flowers around your garden, flowers that are blue, and purple, and colors that you've never even seen. You have a lake, and a gazebo on an island out in the middle of it. It will be a place for you and your Savior to meet alone, a place of comfort and sweetness.

All this and more are yours, simply because you have declared that yes, you will accept the Lord Jesus as your Lord and Savior.

Earth is transient - it is slowly passing away. Nothing here will last long. Everything here is mortal. It will all pass into nothing. But home, home where God is, and Jesus is, and we are going, that place is worth whatever we have here.

What you have gone through is not of God. However, God can use what you have gone through to help others. But first, you must help yourself.

 

[BFine]

I think I have been telling myself that I am nothing to anybody so long that I believe it, have come to terms with it, and run my life despite it. It does make me wonder though if this is the right thing to believe. I know that it is not the best way to think, but on the other hand I do live a productive life, and I do live up to my responsabilities. Its just like long ago I came to the conclusion that for some reason this was my life and I just had to learn to adapt around it.

*It's referred to as abuse mentality... usual lingo:
"This is how things are and I'm living with it because I
don't deserve anything better."

The above is a falsehood. According to the Word of God:
Christ clothes you with his righteousness.
Every hair of your head is numbered.
He stores your tears in a bottle.
He knows you completely and you are His Child.
He Loves you with an Everlasting Love.
You are the daughter of the God, Most High.
God has a plan for you and it for good not bad.

Are you getting how valued and loved you are?
Not only by the Lord but also by those
of us who make up the body of Christ.
Each part of The Body of Christ is as important as any of the other parts.

When one part is suffering, all the rest suffers as well.
I'm am sadden that you are haunted by your past of abuse/neglect
but also are in a marriage where you subject to being emotionally
abused.

Are you wanting to make a change?
You see, "we" don't want any part of The Body to be suffering...
personally speaking:
It is my sincere prayer that you would seek help from the effects of
emotional abuse that has been in your life for far too long.

Break loose those "bonds of enslavement"-- so you can be free.
Emotional abuse is just another tool that the enemy uses to "imprison"
folks, cause he don't want you making an impact for the Kingdom of God.
He wants you to stay just as you are, chained to the past, not actually believing
God's Word or applying it in your life and marriage.

The Word of God is Life and Power-- to those who believe and apply it.

Are you ready to believe and apply it in your life and or situation?

You came here seeking advice-- but are you prepared to receive what you
are looking for?

I commend you on taking that step to seek answers.
I also commend you on your work ethic and taking care of your children.
I commend you on seeking fellowship with other Christians and for trying
to persevere in a difficult marriage.

It takes courage to make changes, I pray the Lord gives
you the strength and boldness to break free from the chains that bind.

 

[lutherangerman]

Dear Sister, I feel you about the husband thing. I wish I could really help but it's probably a really complex and bad situation, particularly since it seems like your husband isn't acknowledging your pain and his faults.

I have a small advice ... the experience of God is often like water. It is not so spectacular, the spectactular comes when you have drunk the water believingly, and get an outlook on God's goodness and the realization that you're not just some person but a SPECIAL person. That also means, your suffering here betrays a noble soul that loves other people more than herself.

Loving yourself is more of an activity than an attitude. If you give yourself a treat, you love yourself. If you play an instrument in the evening, you can do so to love yourself. Get to know who you are, this is a lifelong quest and it helps with the quest of finding who God is. You are in the image of God, so God is not all too different from you, it is only magnitude and certain wondrous abilities, and that God is not living here on Earth like we do, that separates us from God. I mean, God knows your sense of not being able to love yourself in Christ. He has felt completely the same way. It's like he also had an abusive spouse and bad parents. God relates to us that way, and you must also relate to him that way. When we say God knows our humanity, realize that this means God has feelings like us in our humanity. God is not a perfect icon of ours in the sense of him being a frozen image of perfection. God is perfect because he's perfect, because of being God, and he puts that aside and loves us. God always puts himself aside and rather loves us. And you can take that love as your safety and consolation in life, and then learn to love yourself. Take up activities just because you know they will make you happy. Find people who treat you like a real friend.

I always tell people to take up an art, or a science, or reading. And if you want to stay with your husband despite of the abuse, make it a plan to change him in time. You're not his slave, you can put up some limits to his behavior and tell him about them. Pray about it, without despair but with desire that God would help you with wisdom and spiritual assistances. Give your husband meaningful little gifts. Make him see that your three little children are also his three little children, and that you're their mother just as he is their father.

God bless you, Jesus loves you. I wish I could talk with your husband...