Dealing with Unfriendly/Extremely Cold People

[playbluebabble]

I've had this issue on my mind for a long while now, and I thought I could help myself by seeking the perspective of other believers.

I find myself extremely bothered and confused about how to deal with people who are unfriendly/aloof. I'm 99% sure I haven't done anything wrong to this person, but they simply ignore me when I say hi in the hallways, all the while being super friendly to the people they know.

Worldly wisdom would simply dictate to ignore the person, I know that Jesus calls us to love all people and pray for our enemies. Problem is, continually being friendly to this person is extremely difficult when they just keep being cold. And yet, to ignore them and treat them coldly isn't probably what Jesus meant by being loving.

So, I'm confused, and could use your advice as to what the Christian thing would be to do so that I could have a clear conscience. Many thanks in advance!

Jesus spoke of having a "I do not know you" attitude to some people. He spoke of testifying to people and if they did not accept the message to wipe one's shoes off and "keep one's peace to one's self".

Some people seek to drain peace from others by tresspassing against them. These tresspasses may be subtle, but the damage is ultimately felt.

This does not mean because someone is cold to you that therefore you are in the wrong. At all. People tend to be cold and callous. They are lacking love and faith.

But being cold or distant from someone is by no means a sin.

 

[Shulamite7]

I will give you the same advice I gave to another person on another thread. Surrender all these people to the Lord and lets wait and watch patiently how He will work out things for you in His way and His timing.

 

[LilLamb219]

Well, I've slightly brought up the issue with two very close friends of mine who are also co-workers.

They haven't directly seen her being unfriendly/curt to me but they both have mentioned that she came off as standoffish and cold, and in one's case, she also treated him extremely coldly in a similar way she's treated me. Yet, I know of maybe half a dozen people she's extremely friendly and kind to, so it just boggles me.

If she's done it to other people too, then don't take it personally. Stay polite but don't go out of your way since she's not receptive anyway. I doubt you'll ever discover her reasons for being cold to you unfortunately.

 

[KashiaJN142627]

How great is our God.

 

[cirrus999]

Thanks again everyone. I've been in prayer pretty intensely for the past week or two and will continue to do so. Seems like the situation will change when that happens.

Striking a balance between faking it till you make it and ignoring the person and feeling guilty... man there's nothing black and white in life. I'm sure Jesus himself knew that.

 

[JacobTheBlacksmith]

Well i got a situation for you. What is one compelled to do when many others are just faithless men. They don't believe in god. And in my heart i feel hurt because they don't understand how spiritual the love of Christ really is! I get laughed at because i let people know that Christ died for our sins, and I've studied enough text, gathered enough historical evidence in my mind to tell others the good word. Even with my words i just feel as though these men need something more. Their hearts were too hard, and i feel like even if i could physically prove somehow that Christ is the son of god, they still wouldn't believe me. Why has our nation become so disbelieving? Religion today is totally destroyed from government, that faithless men have the answers! who agrees with a faithless leader? The men who fought for the independence of this country believed in Christ as the son of god and look where it brought you? The most powerful country in the world.

SO my question is, what is a 19 year old man gonna do to save people he doesn't know but loves not because he wants to but he's required to.

 

[SportsJunkie25]

Dear Cirrus,

Stop saying hello to that person. The end!

In all seriousness, no need to continue to say hello; get ignored; then get upset. You know he/she is going to ignore you so why do you continue to say hello? It's obvious this person has issues (perhaps with you? Perhaps not? You may never know...)--everyone in life isn't friendly... Tis is the way the cookie crumbles.

 

[Forealzchola]

I also have issues with this. Some people are just purely mean, rude and cold hearted. Some are jealous and are "haters". I myself have just stopped acknowledging people that do the following as described when your nice gestures dont go over. I experience this alot on my job and even people trying to get me fired because they just dont like me for no reason. Many times like others have said..more than anything, it is really the enemy.

 

[achristian2]

This thread is timely as I'm having to deal with this currently. So thanks for starting this.

 

[Goodbook]

Maybe it's just a guy thing she has? Don't know just guessing, as women tend to be more comfortable/chatty with each other than men. I wouldn't take it personally. I'm not bothered if somone doesn't greet me in the hallway at work, because we all have work to do! Some of us are quiet and shy, I mean does she smile or wave..or just walks past without hearing? She could be deaf. All sorts of things. Don't beat yourself up about it.

Now if you were keen on her, that would be a different story.