((((HUGE-HUGZZZZ))))
Goes out, to those whom find themselves alone at this time
As God is witness to my own loneliness of some, eleven years
I reach out and tell you... that there is HOPE
My own illness, Peripheral Vascular Disease [blocked veins and arteries]
brought me, the disgust of the 'woman' in my life and two [at least] of our six children
whom, were young enough and naieve-enough to swallow
the lies she wanted them to believe
With them living-with her_ she became eligible
to cheaper council [local authority] housing, whilst I had to pay for private accomodation
[no-dependant children]
I faced, a downhill shuffle [alone, after 30 years]
alone that is, save for the visits I received from my two older sons,
who [being male] found my-company, more rewarding
and of-course our two daughters, that showed me, that their love for their father
would survive 'the stories' their Mother promulgated
I had at this time already joined CF
and, some really-cool 'guys and gals' took me to their hearts
Many, have now moved-on_ 'passed'.... ahead of me
I will not delete them from my 'friends list', for-reason, to me, they are not "dead"
but, are simply 'gone-on ahead'
I had faced a future, that had no-prospects of, a male-female relationship
because my circulatory 'problems' also imposed, impotency, upon me
But, God, works in miraculous ways, His 'mysteries' to-perform
[no textual error]
~
On another forums, at-which I had been a member, for four years
a self-confessed 'lesbian' [member] approached me
re: this friend of her's who was having computer-problems
+and asked; if, I could offer her 'help'
After many weeks of concerted efforts, my instruction and Mary's trust
we found that her laptop was irrepairable
Her son Andrew, a technician at Salford University provided her with a PC desktop
and for different reasons, we continued to enjoy an online 'fellowship'
I'd learned that she had been divorced the past fourteen years [after 32 years marriage]
and had had, no desire for another man in her life
From the outset, I had been honest, with regard to my health
and made it absolutely clear, that I was not seeking another heterosexual relationship
My days, of family creation had ended way-back in 1985
when, I had undertaken, the irreversible kind of, vasectomy
because a further pregnancy in my [then] beloved wife, would be extremely life-threatening
Her, having suffered a transverse-tear of the uterus, and a hysterectomy
would traumatise her further and that, something I could-not have wished upon her
Over the year that followed, Mary and I found ourselves with MUCH that we could 'offer' each-other
Our past-experience, gave us 'mutual-understandings', with regard to each-other's needs
and our relationship found very-firm foundations
We tested each other, with visits to each other's homes, for two-three days at a time
Periods, that I termed 'BUMPING ELBOWS' ...
hey
we-survived
and so it was, that I used-up the last of my savings... to head 'outa-town'
~some 182 miles north, to Mary's home
I arrived on the evening of, Friday 6th July 2007
and I am just so-happy... to tell you, that I am still here
and in the company of a 'real-live-angel'
We are engaged to be married [since her birthday on 23rd December 2007]
but a wedding, would be prohibitively-expensive on our joint-income
Our engagement, took-place, before the assembled gathering
of four of Mary's five children and their families,
and our vows to each-other, have been witnessed by our Father via prayer
It is my belief, that it was He, that brought-us together
for we complement each-other, in ways, that my ex and I, never-did
I recall my ex saying [toward the very end] "I want a divorce"
and, my response was "Thank God for that" !!!
for it was then, that I saw an end, to her punishmment of, my wounded heart
When you REALLY LOVE SOMEONE....
you must, also love them ENOUGH, to let them go
Because, YOU WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY [?]
Because, for them to stay, would make them miserable [?]
Because, there was nothing that your heart could do to 'KEEP THEM'
There will always be, some things that we cannot change
and yes, despite our wish, for them to be otherwise, we are bound to accept them
~as being 'unchangeable'
Let us never, regret, those happy, productive years we shared with those whom we loved
and treasured so-much
But instead, let us praise Him for those blessings
The Lord will bring us through, ALL, that He brings us to face
and I join you in your appreciation, that He brings us to deal with some really tough emotional turmoil
that is I KNOW, such a very big LUMP to have-to swallow
His purpose/ reason for bringing us to face destruction of all we value [in the world] so HARD to 'see'
He teaches us that the worldly-stuff, has no-place, in Heaven
As someone that has had no real-reason to continue my existence in the world [?]
I confirm, that Jesus does not give us, as the world gives us
on the contrary, He gives us a peace and comfort, that unbelievers can have no-awareness of
We are, never alone :no:
We can be, in situations, where we can feel that He is absent [elsewhere] even, too-busy
to watch over us, FALSE!!!!
Don't listen-to 'Satan'
Psalm 23 (NIV)
The God of Love my Shepherd is.....
God Bless you all
dave
you.
IMAGINARY 
Praise God 
