Christie: Track immigrants like FedEx packages

[Vylo]

http://www.cnn.com/2015/08/29/politics/chris-christie-fedex-packages/index.html

Laconia, New Hampshire (CNN)Chris Christie said Saturday that if elected president, he will track undocumented immigrants like FedEx packages.

"I'm going to have Fred Smith, the founder of FedEx, come work for the government for three months. Just come for three months to Immigration and Customs Enforcement and show these people," the New Jersey governor said at a town hall event here.

Christie added that while FedEx can track boxes, the U.S. can't track undocumented immigrants.

"You go online and at any moment, FedEx can tell you where that package is," he said. "Yet we let people come into this country with visas, and the minute they come in, we lose track of them."

First he says undocumented, then he talks about Visas.

Apparently immigrants don't count as humans...

I'm not inclined to take advice from a governor of the state with the 4th highest illegal population, that's over 1,000 miles from the border. He's not exactly doing a bang up job here.

 

[Arcangl86]

He does have a point about all those who overstay their visa's though, and I don't think the other GOP candidates are even talking about that. That being said, I really wished he used UPS as an example, just for all the "what can brown do for you" jokes that could have been made.

 

[JustOneWay]

LOL on Christie.

Next week Trump will add it to his immigration policy

Where is Hector Cruz?
Who?
Sorry, his tracking number is 148587266.
He was supposed to be shipped back 2 days ago.

 

[Aryeh Jay]

Why would we need to track them? When they all voluntarily come in to get their UPC code tattooed on their neck, just ship them back.

 

[TerranceL]

Well... we know that Christie must really love the game "papers please".

That said whenever you watch a movie about the that was based in cold war era europe and you see all the people stopping at check points so that armed guards can check their papers to see if they have permission from the state to be in that area.

That's what Christie wants, except in his world it would probably work like this:

Immigrant # 659877435579 leaves his house, as he walks out the door he swipes a card through a bright blue "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" so and presses the "out" button so that the system can report he is leaving his property, as he drives through town his "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION COMMUNICATION DEVICE" which is permanently set to search for wifi, when a signal is found, it will triangulate your relative position and send this information to your local, "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION OFFICE". If for any reason you leave an area where there are wifi signals the phones gps will activate and perform the same function as the wifi. It is a finable offense to allow your phone to run out of power for any reason, and attempting to turn the phone off will just cause it to reboot. Having the battery removed by anybody but a "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION OFFICIAL" will incur a fine or depending upon how long the device is offline a jail sentence. Allowing the device to be out of power for more than one hour is a jailable offense.

As Immigrant # 659877435579 continues along his day he stops at various stores and business, given that wifi triangulation isn't powerful enough to pinpoint exactly which shop or business he has entered and gps signals will not penetrate the buildings he must swipe his card through a green "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" when he enters and leaves the business. Failure to do so will incur a fine.

After a long day of hard work like a real American Immigrant # 659877435579 returns home, he swipes his card on the "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" and presses the "in" button and makes supper and sits down to relax and watch tv to enjoy how free and peaceful things are now that President Christie has taken care of that illegal alien problem.


I have too much free time.

 

[morningstar2651]

Well... we know that Christie must really love the game "papers please".

That said whenever you watch a movie about the that was based in cold war era europe and you see all the people stopping at check points so that armed guards can check their papers to see if they have permission from the state to be in that area.

That's what Christie wants, except in his world it would probably work like this:

Immigrant # 659877435579 leaves his house, as he walks out the door he swipes a card through a bright blue "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" so and presses the "out" button so that the system can report he is leaving his property, as he drives through town his "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION COMMUNICATION DEVICE" which is permanently set to search for wifi, when a signal is found, it will triangulate your relative position and send this information to your local, "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION OFFICE". If for any reason you leave an area where there are wifi signals the phones gps will activate and perform the same function as the wifi. It is a finable offense to allow your phone to run out of power for any reason, and attempting to turn the phone off will just cause it to reboot. Having the battery removed by anybody but a "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION OFFICIAL" will incur a fine or depending upon how long the device is offline a jail sentence. Allowing the device to be out of power for more than one hour is a jailable offense.

As Immigrant # 659877435579 continues along his day he stops at various stores and business, given that wifi triangulation isn't powerful enough to pinpoint exactly which shop or business he has entered and gps signals will not penetrate the buildings he must swipe his card through a green "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" when he enters and leaves the business. Failure to do so will incur a fine.

After a long day of hard work like a real American Immigrant # 659877435579 returns home, he swipes his card on the "FRIENDLY IMMIGRATION READER" and presses the "in" button and makes supper and sits down to relax and watch tv to enjoy how free and peaceful things are now that President Christie has taken care of that illegal alien problem.


I have too much free time.

Glory to Arstotzka!

 

[wing2000]

Brilliant! The US Gov. can set up tracking stations along the border: "All persons passing beyond this point must have an RFID chip implanted."

 

[Armoured]

http://www.cnn.com/2015/08/29/politics/chris-christie-fedex-packages/index.html



First he says undocumented, then he talks about Visas.

Apparently immigrants don't count as humans...

I'm not inclined to take advice from a governor of the state with the 4th highest illegal population, that's over 1,000 miles from the border. He's not exactly doing a bang up job here.

Why do I imagine that if he was talking about citizens in such terms, we'd be hearing wailing about Big Brother, the NWO and the Mark of the Beast?

 

[JustOneWay]

<STAFF EDIT>

The argument has nothing to do with people inhabiting previously uninhabited lands.

 

[Red Fox]

Maybe we can make them wear ARMBANDS! That way as they walk down the streets they can be "scanned" (high tech version of "show us your papers")

The GOP really are working overtime to make this country great! Just like that one country back in the 1930's....

I was thinking all of this was kind of reminiscent to that as well.

 

[Blank Stair]

Visa's should take on the same appearance as a passport. With a GPS tracking fiber inside so as to be able to locate the holder and especially when the visa expires.
A database that has visas and expiration alerts that flag on the day would cut down on over-stays immensely.

I don't see President Christie in our future anyway so he's not got to worry about making plans such as these come to fruition. God knows what he's done to Jersey. Don't let him have the nation at his disposal. Egads!

http://www.cnn.com/2015/08/29/politics/chris-christie-fedex-packages/index.html



First he says undocumented, then he talks about Visas.

Apparently immigrants don't count as humans...

I'm not inclined to take advice from a governor of the state with the 4th highest illegal population, that's over 1,000 miles from the border. He's not exactly doing a bang up job here.

 

[FreeinChrist]

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[amanuensis63]

It is important to single out the "other" in any sort of demagogic politics. In the case of illegal immigration in the US it is apparently trending downward and isn't really the real issue facing us economically. It is a fake front of sorts. While illegal immigration should be stopped (unless we want to change it to "legal" immigration, but that's another debate), that does not mean that illegal immigration is such a huge problem for us. The more focus the GOP puts on it the less likely we are to see the real underlying problems in our society which are more related to economic inequality (of opportunity) and lack of civic focus (we lost sight of our infrastructure, we're willing to let it crumble but we are willing build a giant wall in the desert?)