Babies Babies Babies!

[Verve]

Do you ever feel pressured by church culture to just get married and pop out Christian babies already?

Especially all those older women who look at you with pity as if there is something wrong with your spiritual path because you're single?

 

[Andrew12]

I've never been pressured to have a baby.





actually, it'd be weird if someone did.

 

[Nom De Guerre]

Don't attend church, so no I don't get bothered by anybody to settle down and have children already; it's the little things like this that make me think that the church culture is so weird...

 

[Fremdin]

I think who puts the greatest pressure on me to have babies is my underused uterus. Once a month she protest. Sorry sweetie, I'm selfish.

 

[Obzocky]

Yes, especially since i'm one of the few from the original friend group who has not met/married/spawned yet. It can be a source of amusement, especially when they think i'm only at university to find a husband who can "keep" me properly.



I should add they've given trying to "match" and now feel that I should just go with any man willing to have me, in their world someone who, ideally, is almost never at home XD

 

[PinkSweetart]

Nope. No pressure here. I don't really know anybody at my church and even if I did I doubt the would. Plus, I'm way to young to be thinking about babies. I kind of have to find a guy for that first.

 

[Verve]

Yes, especially since i'm one of the few from the original friend group who has not met/married/spawned yet. It can be a source of amusement, especially when they think i'm only at university to find a husband who can "keep" me properly.

That's pretty much where I am.

Even if I was married wouldn't want kids until I'm 30 anyways.

One woman told me, "Well my daughter got married at 20 and they're perfectly happy." I said "Does she have a college education?" and she quickly retreated to the kitchen to "clean something."

 

[benf]

There is something really wrong and insensitive with that kind of pressure.

Not everybody is right for raising children.

Not everybody can even phsyicaly have them!!

Personally, I'd like children, but the people who do that just make me roll my eyes and feel sorry for anybody in the above groups.

 

[Amber.ly]

The only pressure I get is from myself.

My 10 year plan has been ruined!!!! I was supposed to be married with 2 children right now, with another on the way and 2 more planned for.

I'm sorta kidding but sorta not.

 

[Thunder Peel]

I don't want kids so I never think about it. The last thing this world needs is more people like me running around.

 

[timothyZ]

If anyone pressures me about not having kids, I'll just pressure them about their lack of sleep due to having kids.

 

[Verve]

If anyone pressures me about not having kids, I'll just pressure them about their lack of sleep due to having kids.

Do guys get pressured about settling down and having kids as much as girls?

Sometimes I feel like culture says that having kids and being a wife is the only thing I'm there for.

 

[Sketcher]

I kinda feel it, being as I'm an uncle now.

One woman told me, "Well my daughter got married at 20 and they're perfectly happy." I said "Does she have a college education?" and she quickly retreated to the kitchen to "clean something."

There are some people who wouldn't see this as a problem.

 

[mina]

I've had my share of people looking down on me b/c i was single and had no children. I don't feel pressure from them; but i used to put a lot of pressure on myself...because i want children and want to be a mother and a wife...... But, people that say snide and stupid stuff to others for being single or not having kids is just very unsavory and I do my best to stay away from such people. Some of them are just miserable or insecure in their own life and have to look down on others to feel better or something.

I get sick of people who snobbishly declare they are better because they got married young and didn't go to college....just as I get sick of people who snobbishly declare that they are better because they got married later and have finacial security and are educated mothers. Life has different paths and neither are better than the other if you are walking with the Lord. I hate how twisted people can get about this issue.

If anyone treats me or anyone else badly because of this issue (either side) I don't want to get to know them or hang out with them. It's just not worth it. When anyone says anything snarky to me anymore, I just ask them "why would you say that?" or "well, that isn't very kind".

My life sort of transitioned in the last year or so; and having children is a dream that is within grasp now..... and it's truly horrifying seeing people who thought I was such a bad terrible Christian (because i was single and we all know you don't marry by a certian age unless you are one of the truly pious ) cozy up to me and try to be my bff, but at the same time reminding me in every conversation that they were married before me and have children already. Yuck. Someone even told me that I met someone because I decided to follow God now....um what? How insulting and how very ignorant. I don't want to be friends with insulting and ignorant, because they are insecure, people.

 

[Obzocky]

Have to be honest any response to "did she go to university?" usually ends in "why does she need a degree to be a mother?" XD

 

[Amber.ly]

I kinda feel it, being as I'm an uncle now.



There are some people who wouldn't see this as a problem.

I don't see a problem with not having a college education.

But I'm not a fan of "just get married cause it's what we do" mentality. One of my sister-in-laws got married at 19 and another one is getting married in August and she will be 19. Neither have a college degree and both are exactly where they should be.

What I truly hate are all the chicks going to Christian colleges for an MRS degree

 

[tapi]

Although I hope that in future I'll have children and a wonderful family, I don't think I'd be ready to bear the responsibility of being a father yet even if I had a wife already Certainly my life situation would be far from ideal at the very least. I think it'll take 5-10 years or so before I'll give it any serious consideration

 

[Perhaps Today]

Do guys get pressured about settling down and having kids as much as girls?

Sometimes I feel like culture says that having kids and being a wife is the only thing I'm there for.

I can't say I've really been pressured about it too much. Which is a good thing, considering I don't want kids.

If culture is dictating that a woman's only worth is to be a wife and a mother, then it's a sad culture in which we live. Not every woman is meant to be a mother. Some can't have kids, and some are just better off not having them. You can be a good Christian woman and wife without having children.

On a side note I'm very pro-life, so I'm not advocating abortion.

 

[Sketcher]

I don't see a problem with not having a college education.

But I'm not a fan of "just get married cause it's what we do" mentality. One of my sister-in-laws got married at 19 and another one is getting married in August and she will be 19. Neither have a college degree and both are exactly where they should be.

What I truly hate are all the chicks going to Christian colleges for an MRS degree

That's a big reason why I avoided Christian colleges. There's so much that's not genuine with those gals.

 

[GQ Chris]

I'm glad I'm not a chic and have to deal with this issue.