Are Guys Who Share Their Emotions a Turn-Off?

[Amber.ly]

Guys shouldn't have to be shoved in a box of stoicness. They have real and raw emotions that should be shared. But like anyone, it shouldn't control them and they should use wisdom in whom they share things with.

Not every person in this world is equipped or ready to deal with your crap. You need to choose the people carefully. I say this with experience behind it LOL

 

[Wren]

Well, I guess I'm screwed then. :/ Might as well tell me "women like guys with naturally purple skin".

There are women who appreciate your way with emotions, too. Women are complex and varied, which is why threads like this aren't necessarily helpful to the OPs. I mean, sure it's good to know what women in general may think, but it's what a woman who is a good match for you really thinks that's important.

Oh, and to answer the OP, I'm in the handles emotions in a mature/appropriate manner camp.

 

[MacFall]

I'm rescinding my previous post.

I'm not one to edit out posts that have already been read, but I take it back. It was meant to be sarcastic, but it wasn't fair, because I was interpreting the preceding statement (about how women prefer men that express their emotions) too broadly.

I suppose it comes down to what expressing emotions "in a mature, appropriate way" means to the individual woman. For me, it means expressing them rarely and briefly, and if that makes me look like a robot to a woman, then we're not meant for each other. But as Paradox here and others in private have noted, not all women are like that. I just haven't met any in person who like non-emotive men.

And by the way, just because a man doesn't emote doesn't mean he suppresses his emotions. Emotions aren't physical substances. They CAN be dealt with internally without building up pressure like steam. I can find something amusing without LOLing, and I can be grieved by something without shedding tears. If I think it warrants involving other people, I will tell them. But in general, I find my emotions to be irrational, and acting on them to be improper; and I don't see any benefit, for myself or another person, to expose that other person to them. And for that reason, I find emoting largely to be a waste of energy best spent on something else.

 

[leothelioness]

I'm rescinding my previous post.

I'm not one to edit out posts that have already been read, but I take it back. It was meant to be sarcastic, but it wasn't fair, because I was interpreting the preceding statement (about how women prefer men that express their emotions) too broadly.

I suppose it comes down to what expressing emotions "in a mature, appropriate way" means to the individual woman. For me, it means expressing them rarely and briefly, and if that makes me look like a robot to a woman, then we're not meant for each other. But as Paradox here and others in private have noted, not all women are like that. I just haven't met any in person who like non-emotive men.

And by the way, just because a man doesn't emote doesn't mean he suppresses his emotions. Emotions aren't physical substances. They CAN be dealt with internally without building up pressure like steam. I can find something amusing without LOLing, and I can be grieved by something without shedding tears. If I think it warrants involving other people, I will tell them. But in general, I find my emotions to be irrational, and acting on them to be improper; and I don't see any benefit, for myself or another person, to expose that other person to them. And for that reason, I find emoting largely to be a waste of energy best spent on something else.

You sound a lot like my dad.

But, to reiterate what others have said, there are women out there (like myself) who prefer men like how you describe. As I said in a previous post, I'm not comfortable with men who wear their emotions on their sleeves. So, hopefully that gives you some consolation. You'll eventually meet one, I can assure you.

 

[Shadesofgray]

I'm rescinding my previous post.

I'm not one to edit out posts that have already been read, but I take it back. It was meant to be sarcastic, but it wasn't fair, because I was interpreting the preceding statement (about how women prefer men that express their emotions) too broadly.

I suppose it comes down to what expressing emotions "in a mature, appropriate way" means to the individual woman. For me, it means expressing them rarely and briefly, and if that makes me look like a robot to a woman, then we're not meant for each other. But as Paradox here and others in private have noted, not all women are like that. I just haven't met any in person who like non-emotive men.

And by the way, just because a man doesn't emote doesn't mean he suppresses his emotions. Emotions aren't physical substances. They CAN be dealt with internally without building up pressure like steam. I can find something amusing without LOLing, and I can be grieved by something without shedding tears. If I think it warrants involving other people, I will tell them. But in general, I find my emotions to be irrational, and acting on them to be improper; and I don't see any benefit, for myself or another person, to expose that other person to them. And for that reason, I find emoting largely to be a waste of energy best spent on something else.

I am in the same boat as you here. I also usually express my emotions briefly and rarely as well. I like to deal with them in my own way. I often find that is the best way for me to deal with them. I am someone that easily lets the things of the past rest in the past. After I quickly deal with my emotions in my personal manner, it's easy to move on to something much more productive. I'd rather not waste my time explaining something to someone else that I've already dealt with and don't feel the need to worry about anymore. That being said... if it is absolutely essential that someone else needs to deal with things for their own sake, I will engage but try to settle the matter as quickly as possible. This occassionally causes issues though as once I deal with something, I tend to let it go and not think about it much again. Others sometimes can't let it go.

 

[GQ Chris]

This is why.

 

[GQ Chris]

^5:09 lol

 

[Apollo Celestio]

Women are physically repressed and men are intellectually repressed, how interesting. Who's to blame?

I'm not really expressive naturally, I don't think that makes me a chick magnet.

 

[Ceta_cea]

I think guys show strength by being able to show their emotion. How should I deal with a guy if I don't know how he feels? How should I be understanding and helpful if I don't know if he is angry or hurt or tired or sad?

Of course we should not be ruled by our emotion, but they are a very personal way to tell others how we are and what defines us. Aren't you showing your emotion when you talk to God? Why not doing it with your girlfriend or wive? In my country there is a saying which I'll try to translate. "If you are share joy you double it up and if you share sorrow it will be cut in half".

I pray to God that he will give me a man who is comfortable with showing his emotion, who can talk about how he feels. That way I will get closer to him. But that is only my option.