Am I a Sinner For Wanting to Divorce for This?

[stuart lawrence]

That is an understandable position, certainly. The idea of joining yourself to a prostitute has no connotation of marriage when Paul says "Never". You are not joining her as part of her prostitution if you were marrying her. I would be interested if you have any Biblical support for your concept that it is fine to divorce your wife if God did not join you together. I suppose you could say that the divorces demanded in Ezra support it, though I can't find anything but a historic account of what happened there; God never says whether he approves of it or not.
I wrote this on the e-mail alerting me that you had responded to my comments, but feared it would not show up here, so c/p it here - hope it isn't a repeat.

In your previous post you wrote, and i quote:

The basis of God joining people together is HIS PLAN that the two shall become one.

So I'm kinda puzzled as to why you don't agree with the point in making. I'm speaking of people where that basis does not apply, people who marry and disobey God by doing so. It was never his plan that the two shall become one. If you don't have the basis in place for God joining two people together, how can God join all people together who get married? That isn't possible is it?

You asked me if i had scripture to support the belief it is fine for you to divorce your wife if God did not join you together/ you specifically disobey God by marrying a certain person.
I would be interested to know if you have scripture That specifically states if you marry anyone in disobedience to God you must remain with them until one of you dies.
We are both giving our personal opinions aren't we?
What I do know of is people who have divorced as it was not Gods plan for their life they married the person and God has subsequently blessed them in their life or ministry
You finished your post by saying you hope you did not repeat yourself. I think there is a danger here we both end up doing that as we are repeatedly discussing the same particular point.
As we have both made our particular points of view clear, I think we have probably reached the point of only repeating previous points I we continue on

 

[D2wing]

What has human law got to do with it (Biblically speaking)?

It is not about human law. It is that marriage is a covenant between a man and women ordained since the beginning. It predates religion and was spoken over Adam and Eve. It does not depend on belief system to be true. It is human law that ignores this covenant relationship. It is human thinking that allows sexual relationships outside of marriage between a man and a women.
It doesn't matter if it is a civil marriage or in what culture or legal system the wedding occurs. We innately know the difference between shacking up and being married.

 

[D2wing]

So if God specifically showed me it was not his will for me to marry a particular person but I disobeyed God and married the person anyway God has joined us together?

Yes, marriage between a man and women predates all religion and the law of Moses allowed for divorce. God doesn't dictate who you marry. If you marry the wrong person it is your mistake, not God's. It is still a covenant relationship. Tis is made clear in many places in the Bible. A marriage between a man and a women is a covenant before God no matter what human culture or law. Man choses by his will not necessarily God's. God sanctions regardless of human opinion. Divorce is breaking that covenant and is allowed under Moses Law. Divorce is not justified except for adultery in the new covenant but is still a divorce is a divorce. Christians get divorced for many reasons and can be forgiven but it is not God's perfect will. I think it is pretty clear that God prefers that instead of divorce you become perfected in love. If you divorce you will still have the problems that caused the divorce. You can blame your spouse but the real problem is you. You need to learn to be Christ like in love. Totally unselfish.
But this is not a law, we are under grace and this is a sin that can be forgiven and we can move on in my opinion. But I recommend extreme caution in this area. I cannot speak specifically to everyones situation.

 

[daydreamergurl15]

And second question, would be separating and not divorcing me the same thing? I'm honestly over marriage, I'm not sure I would ever do it again given the chance. I would be just as happy focusing my life on God and being his tool in the community. If I stay in this situation I pretty much have to accept being submissive to my wife and doing everything she says. Or continue to constantly live my life trying to avoid arguments with her.

The reasons you got married are suspect but if you divorce her for this, you won't have to worry about getting remarried, you won't have biblical grounds to do so.

Truth is, you both decided to commit to each other before God and it is up to the both of you to keep that comittment. You need to do a lot of praying and I hope that God work on both of you guys to realize how to repair the marriage.

God bless.

 

[daydreamergurl15]

What if a man divorces his wife who has his children and married another woman, has God joined them together?
What if God specifically shows a man he should not marry a certain woman but he goes ahead and marries her anyway, has God joined them together?

I want to say that I do not believe that God tells people to "specifically" marry someone (unless you're Hosea ), I do however think He gives us Scriptures that we are able to read, understand and show discernment. If we know that a particular person does not possess the qualities that are instructed for a husband/wife it would be prudent that we obey. But if we do not obey and we marry in the correct definition of marriage, we are to be committed to each other. And while there will be hard times, very hard indeed, we both need to have that commitment to God.

As for your written situation, we need to remember that God probably knows 50 different situations scenarios and yet He still tells us that what He joins together do not part. Therefore we can be sure that he means what he says.

As for the man marrying another woman, if he did not get a biblical divorce, in the eyes of God he is not married to the other woman, they just commit adultery, Matthew 19.

We need to be wise and discerning about marriage. And we need to be obedient as well. God is not trying to hurt us if He allows us to see character flaws that are too much to deal with. But we do however have to understand that we have to face consequences of our choices-some good/some bad-and that God can work in any situation.

 

[D2wing]

What has human law got to do with it (Biblically speaking)?

By legal marriage, I mean Biblical marriage, not human law. A marriage between one man and one women both being consenting adults that is recognized in whatever culture they are in. I don't speak for God but this is my opinion.