To "assign positive intent" [which, fwiw, is what I was doing] is not to live in a fantasy world but to try to avoid jumping to an incorrect conclusion of motive based on a short period of time to make a perception. If it is a negative place the other person is coming from - oh well, and it's still my choice as to how I deal with that. Positive intent is where there are two or more possible explanations for someone's behavior. Maybe they're just rude. Maybe they're having a bad day. Maybe the bad thing they said came out wrong. So we choose to, while we have no further information, assume that the person wasn't being intentionally hurtful. Sometimes extra info will bear out the positive assumption, sometimes not. But I would rather not, while I don't have enough info to know for sure, assume that someone meant to do something bad.
There are verses in the Bible that indicate that it is not for us to judge the intents/heart of someone's actions. We can judge actions, but not the heart.
While these people are worldly (possibly) - we cannot judge their hearts, only their actions.
I might not have come from an abusive home, but I have plenty of friends and some ex-family who did, and I've seen the statistics over and over again come to fruition. Depending what kind of abusive situation it was - sexual, mental/faith-based, physical, marital... it went one of three ways. According to statistic a or b, or completely the opposite and that person was 1,000x the better person and you'd never dream something so horrid ever happened to them.
You can't know my heart or my brain to make an assumption such as you did about my intentions, the information available to me or whether or not I'm in an unequal situation with unbelievers, or adhere to "radical feminism". You have only a sparse number of postings here of which I have actually been very reserved with my opinions and biblical leanings about.
I'm on the side of humanity. No man, woman, or child (male or female) should ever have to stay in a home, a foster home, an orphanage or work situation where they are being abused in any way, shape or form.
I don't stoop to gender bashing and expect the same respect.
I don't want the world's answer. I want G-d's. Problem is, we live in a fallen world. We work with what we have to the best of our abilities, our fallen natures, and what laws the lands we live in give us.