battling Intrusive Thoughts

kodadog1024 · #1 23rd October 2012, 02:34 PM

anyone have good recommendations on this? I feel like they come in the most unlikely circumstances. Like just Friday when I got my new puppy, it completely opened up the flood gates. I kept having thoughts of wanting to kill him. And then of course it went back to my family. I know I just have to accept them, but I just feel spent. The questions start arising, "will I do this, is this the night I will come home after work and be that maniac you see on tv, and then the whole scenerio plays out in my head and now I'm worrying again. Now I'm tempted to go and start praying about other things in hopes that God will see that I am trying to be good and maybe He will make this go away. Plus the fact as soon as I start getting these thoughts, I start to feel "light headed and numb" and my wife must notice something different about me because then she starts asking me what's wrong. I know I can't talk to her anymore about this because it's not healthy, but sometimes I wish I could just tell her how frustrated, upset and sad this makes me. So, any positive recommendations? Just flat out sucks.

amy422 · #2 23rd October 2012, 05:16 PM

I used to have similar thoughts just about anytime a knife or scissor was setting out. Over time those obsessions have stopped for me and been replaced by others. When it comes to ocd though the only thing that has ever worked for me is to just allow the thought to be there and to not react to it. The more I react, the more persistant the obsession gets. I hope this helps.

adam7272 · #3 23rd October 2012, 06:57 PM

Hi Koda, it seems the best way to deal with this has been to just notice the thought and also remember that when you have had thoughts like this in the past, they did go away, and you never acted on them. I get thoughts a lot about people I care about, not necessarily violent but usually sexual. It disgusts me, and the harder I fight, the more intense the thought comes out. I know how shameful it feels. For whatever reason, these thoughts seem to strike the areas of my life where they are most inappropriate and get the greatest reaction from me. And when I have the thoughts, I will spend so much time analyzing why would I think like that, is this really something I feel. I am starting to notice that when I get in this obsessive/analytical mode about the thoughts, it probably had to do with OCD and I can disregard it. If I really wanted to do these things, I wouldn't have spent so much time fighting and analyzing.

kodadog1024 · #4 24th October 2012, 10:09 AM

Originally Posted by amy422

I used to have similar thoughts just about anytime a knife or scissor was setting out. Over time those obsessions have stopped for me and been replaced by others. When it comes to ocd though the only thing that has ever worked for me is to just allow the thought to be there and to not react to it. The more I react, the more persistant the obsession gets. I hope this helps.

Yea, I know, sometimes the thoughts, coupled with urges can be just overwhelming.

kodadog1024 · #5 24th October 2012, 10:29 AM

Originally Posted by adam7272

Hi Koda, it seems the best way to deal with this has been to just notice the thought and also remember that when you have had thoughts like this in the past, they did go away, and you never acted on them. I get thoughts a lot about people I care about, not necessarily violent but usually sexual. It disgusts me, and the harder I fight, the more intense the thought comes out. I know how shameful it feels. For whatever reason, these thoughts seem to strike the areas of my life where they are most inappropriate and get the greatest reaction from me. And when I have the thoughts, I will spend so much time analyzing why would I think like that, is this really something I feel. I am starting to notice that when I get in this obsessive/analytical mode about the thoughts, it probably had to do with OCD and I can disregard it. If I really wanted to do these things, I wouldn't have spent so much time fighting and analyzing.

That's kinda of the scary part. I think that then I start to rationalize, "well, it will eventually happen"... And I'm much better at work, but when I have to go home, the thoughts almost instantly start and sometimes, my thoughts will be, "well, this is the night, the night I will go completely insane." It makes me so nervous, queasy and almost light headed... And I always want to pinpoint why, how and when my triggers start. But a puppy that I wanted? come on.... just tired of it.

OCD=Owie · #6 25th October 2012, 01:03 AM

Why can't you talk to your wife about this? Does she know you have OCD? Talking about your fears with others can often help a lot. I would often find that, after bottling up a particular obsessive thought for a long time, when I told a loved one about it, I started to realize how silly the thought sounded. It sort of takes the thought out of your tired brain and puts it more within the context of reality.

Not that talking about it cures everything, but it can help. And being open with your spouse about your struggles with this wouldn't be a bad thing.

Liberated91 · #7 27th October 2012, 12:39 AM

In my case I don't battle them, I just realize they aren't true and they don't reflect me. The more you realize that these thoughts are not true the less control they will have over you. It will take awhile but it will get better. What I also did was submerge myself in bible television, I started going I church most of the week (it was in the summer lol) and said bible verses to counteract the unwanted thoughts. I hope I have helped

RecoveringwithChrist · #8 6th November 2012, 12:12 PM

Originally Posted by kodadog1024

anyone have good recommendations on this? I feel like they come in the most unlikely circumstances. Like just Friday when I got my new puppy, it completely opened up the flood gates. I kept having thoughts of wanting to kill him. And then of course it went back to my family. I know I just have to accept them, but I just feel spent. The questions start arising, "will I do this, is this the night I will come home after work and be that maniac you see on tv, and then the whole scenerio plays out in my head and now I'm worrying again. Now I'm tempted to go and start praying about other things in hopes that God will see that I am trying to be good and maybe He will make this go away. Plus the fact as soon as I start getting these thoughts, I start to feel "light headed and numb" and my wife must notice something different about me because then she starts asking me what's wrong. I know I can't talk to her anymore about this because it's not healthy, but sometimes I wish I could just tell her how frustrated, upset and sad this makes me. So, any positive recommendations? Just flat out sucks.

I'm gonna drop some theology down because this may help free you. I remember one day my Bible study leader was talking about the "Dark night of the soul" a book written by a christian guy long ago that talks about how, all of us as children of Adam we have the same spiritual virus called sin, we are born with original sin. And that we all have the same potential for evil inside of us as a Adolf Hitler or the craziest murderer there is.
There's that old native American story where the grandfather is talking to his grandchild telling him that inside of everyone there's 2 wolves fighting, one is good and one is evil, and the kid asks "which one wins?" the old man says "the one that you feed".

But you know at the end of the day it's really God's grace that splits us apart from the murderers and the rapists. I can't even breath without the power of God on my life. This is so we can't have any self-righteousness. We has human beings like to compare and look at others and feel better because "at least i'm not a murderer like that guy" or "at least I'm not rapist like that guy" But in reality this is self-righteousness and until we understand that it's only by God's grace that I am not am murderer or rapist the devil will keep on tormenting us.

The spirit that makes us say "Me?! a murderer or a killer ? Never!" This is pride, and it's just like when Peter said "All will fall away, but me never! " and it's the wrong way to think, you're supposed to understand that because of original sin and the flesh, and because your not the desecendant with a special seed that's not part of the line of Adam like Jesus, that you do have the potential for this kind of stuff, but you just have to stop feeding the "wolf of the flesh" and trust God will keep you safe.

If you're watching horror movies and shows that make you think of this stuff, my friend I suggest you stop watching. It's not a sin to watch t.v or movies. But if you know it's keeping you from having a sound mind and from having a better relationship with God and you family then it is a sin if you don't stop. Just like it's not a sin to go to the beach, but if you struggle with lust and pornography addiction and seeing half naked women will make you lust and fall then it is a sin, so the solution is to avoid because it's feeding that wolf and it will grow and have more power over you.

kodadog1024 · #9 7th November 2012, 02:53 PM

Right on, good thoughts... ^^^

RecoveringwithChrist · #10 8th November 2012, 10:12 AM

Thanks bro. God is good.