Unable to Forgive someone means betraying Christ ?

One of Christ's greatest messages is that we should always be open to mercy and forgiveness, absolutely and without question...is it not?

Then I think I have failed in this regard. I truly believed that no matter what anyone did to me, I can be forgiving....but this one person has damaged me so badly that for a year I can barely do anything but think about how badly they deceived me and how much they let me down.

This person has not actually even asked to be forgiven as of yet, but I heard from other sources that they realize their wrong doings and might reach out to me to express their regret (I am 90 percent certain that they will not really mean what they say)....and the thought of it revolts me. The extent of their actions was so damaging that I can not fathom not hating them, or offering a chance for reconciliation. Even if I force myself to wish them peace, I can absolutely never trust them again no matter what they say, and I just want to erase them from my mind and move on with my life without ever having to acknowledge them again.

That seems to be the one and only option that might offer me some peace. Yet, at the same time, I know it is the unChristian thing to do, added to the fact that as much as I think they are not be genuine in their request for forgiveness, one can not be completely sure.

The thing is, though, that me telling that person that I forgive them and at least ending things on a positive note will just give them what they want. They want to clear their conscious and pretend like what they did really wasn't that bad after all, while I will be stuck with these negative feelings for a long time to come. They want to be "forgiven" so they can benefit from it, but they do not really recognize the error of their ways, and probably never will no matter what I say or do not say.

There seems to be no good solution at all?

Forgivness is not about fairness or justice. You have both of these concepts in your post. Jesus forgave me while I was His enemy, Romans 5:8.

Forgivness is a cleaning out the baggage thing, it's for you, not the other person. There is no room for two gods in you. Jesus said if you worship two gods you will love one and hate the other. Unforgivness is putting yourself first, you are god.

It's not optional, and it's not about whats fair or just or even mercy or grace, it's about who is god in you.

I pray this helps you

__________________
Living John 8:36
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Receiving the spirit of God is a miracle, it's a gift given to those that have been allowed to see their lost condition and they cry out to the Lord: Romans 10:9 If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.

Hmm, yes, I think I understand. It's a good point. And I want to follow it. The weight that is on my chest is that this person, I happened to trust deeply and they meant a lot to me, I thought they were special. It is still hard for me to come to terms with the pain they caused me.

But thank you for the advise, it is wise.