Thank you for the updates!! Continuing to pray!!! (((hug)))
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"If the pace and the push, the noise and the crowds are getting to you, it's time to stop the nonsense and find a place of solace to refresh your spirit." ~Charles Swindoll
"Pray often, for prayer is a shield to the soul,
a sacrifice to God, and a scourge for Satan."
~John Bunyan
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"If the pace and the push, the noise and the crowds are getting to you, it's time to stop the nonsense and find a place of solace to refresh your spirit." ~Charles Swindoll
"Pray often, for prayer is a shield to the soul,
a sacrifice to God, and a scourge for Satan."
~John Bunyan
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i pray for a speedy recovery, and all pain gone. lord you made her body, and I claim now healing to take place. tough her from the crown of her head to the souls of her feet
in jesus name, amen
Dear kind folk, your prayers have not gone unanswered at all, although it might seem so to outward appearances.
What a difference a short space of time can make. Hope of a miracle healing of her serious, multiple, disabling ailments has been diminishing so fast, after periodic upbeat feelings I had on the basis of small gestures she had become able to make.
When I came home early this afernoon after staying by her bedside overnight (with her son, Simon, also), once again the sight of the many items about the flat I associate with her cut me to the quick.
Si went back after a short spell back at the flat, while I had to get a couple of hours shut-eye, before I returned. Si had told me on the phone she was now continuously sedated to avoid the ever-returning cycles of pain (terrible pains in her back for a while now, which I was able to alleviate by massaging, sometimes with some embrocation, was just one source).
There was, of course, a price to pay for that, namely, it has thwarted other possible approaches to treatment of the collection of ills she has been suffering from. It was like juggling, and far too many items in the air at one time.
Anyway, I was little despondent at this negation of, at least, apparent hope for a physical cure, but somewhat relieved to see her somewhat less conscious of her plight. Although, as I mentioned to a young doctor, outside of Anthea's hearing, despite her confused reactions to things at the level of the emotionally-related autonomic intelligence, her reasoning power is absolutely unimpaired, as indeed it still is, in terms of what she is able to hear.
Anyway, I suddenly remembered that beautiful account from Solzhenytisin's own experience in a Siberian prison camp, about the old guy who simply drew a cross in the sand, giving Solzhenytsin Hope, in possession of which he possessed the whole world. If you have hope, you have everything; not so surprising, since it goes in significant measure with the other theological virtues of Faith and Charity.
And I said to Anthea, if you have Hope, you have the universe in the palm of your hand, since it signifies the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of Truth, which cannot deceive us, and I'm sure it filled her with spiritual comfort, going a long way towards banishing fear.
For all I know, the Holy Spirit may have backed up the supernatural sense of it with palpable mystical force. Certainly, when I got back to the flat, to my astonishment, despite my feeling all of the above, I found that instead of recoiling in anguish at the sight of any of the many items I associate with Anthea, I actually felt a certain joy. I mean going from one extreme to the other like that is weird, on the face of it, but since when has the Spirit been negatively-constrained!
Back tomorrow morning, but immensely comforted, and looking forward to seeing the Duchess, if still a little sorry to see her thus (no, 'sorry', period, while still truly rejoicing to be reminded of her person). Thank you all again for your prayers and compassion. Gifts beyond price.
__________________ “It is absurd for the Evolutionist to complain that it is unthinkable for an admittedly unthinkable God to make everything out of nothing, and then pretend that it is more thinkable that nothing should turn itself into everything.” - G K Chesterton
'Anyone who doesn't believe in miracles isn't a realist.' - David Ben Gurion, First Israeli PM.
Last edited by paul becke; 12th May 2012 at 06:54 PM.
Thank you for the update. Lifting her, and each of you to the One Who is able to intervene and minister as only He can do. (((hug)))
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"If the pace and the push, the noise and the crowds are getting to you, it's time to stop the nonsense and find a place of solace to refresh your spirit." ~Charles Swindoll
"Pray often, for prayer is a shield to the soul,
a sacrifice to God, and a scourge for Satan."
~John Bunyan
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"Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest" Matthew 11:28 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world ; but that the world through Him might be saved. John 3:17 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Jesus loves all sinners, not because we sin but because we are people with souls, whom He loves and wants to save from our weaknesses, our sicknesses and sin. That includes includes you and I .. Jesus loves us. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Things couldn't look more bleak on the medical side, apparently, as the prognosis for such a kind of liver failure is a fairly imminent death. I feel at peace about it now, not least for Anthea's sake, but I'm afraid I'm not too good at completely stifling my emotions, particularly when tired. It's just quiet and brief, but is there beneath the surface, even while I can otherwise genuinely laugh and joke.
I know that Anthea cherishes her life - has even done so under such crippling health burdens. We're as unalike as chalk and cheese, but we've rubbed along together, enjoying the simplest pleasures, always confident in each other's loving loyalty. As I told her - if it's not too shocking - I'd rather betray God than betray her; I know his shoulders are broad, but as for the rest of us... Well, I think it would be betraying God in the worst way for that reason. She committed to me 200%, and I to her.
I was talking to an old boy in a hospital some weeks ago, whose wife was in there, suffering from Alzheimers, and unable to recognise him. He loved her dearly so it hurt him hard. He told me he'd been an MP (military police) in Austria or Germany after WWII, and I thought he must have been a tough little nut, as they're usually tall. He did say it was a rough job all right trying to keep law and order among our troops, doubtless, under the influence of vino collapso most of the time, when needing to be subdued(!).
I've been kidding Anthea today - on the face of it, at least, in terms of her likely hopes/prospects for this life, saying that the doctors would be discussing the best way to go about fixing her up again, while keeping her sedated; a difficult task. (It was what we were told on Friday, though I think that doctor was just letting us down gently. This weekend what we've heard is not so encouraging at all, though still sensitively communicated to us.) Anthea needs that kind of encouragement, and I'm not going to deny her it. But, treading a little warily, I hope, I've still been interspersing it with more formally Christian reflections.
Back to see Anthea, God willing, tomorrow with Si, we hope by around midday. Caroline, my step-niece (who came down from St Andrews for an hour or so, today, will be coming back again tomorrow). She's a lovely, very family-oriented young woman, with a brilliant mind, but much more importantly, a heart to match.
More tomorrow, I hope, folks. Thank you again, as ever, for your love and prayers.
__________________ “It is absurd for the Evolutionist to complain that it is unthinkable for an admittedly unthinkable God to make everything out of nothing, and then pretend that it is more thinkable that nothing should turn itself into everything.” - G K Chesterton
'Anyone who doesn't believe in miracles isn't a realist.' - David Ben Gurion, First Israeli PM.
Last edited by paul becke; 13th May 2012 at 08:04 PM.
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