working on self-esteem

I have very little to no self esteem at all. I've lived like this for many years now and its only getting worse. I don't know how to reverse the damage. I know I need to change the way I think, but I can't. I've tried saying more positive things to myself and replacing negative thoughts but the problem is I don't believe it in my head. I don't know if I can get through this. I don't know what else to do.

Caeli, don`t be scared of anyone. Don`t care what ANYONE thinks of you. You just be and who you are and enjoy your life. I`am only a pm away if you would like me to help you about how i finally managed to be more confident about myself.

This is a constant struggle for me and one that very few people understand. I don't know if it will ever get better. You hit dead on what I think exactly which is amazing b/c I never stated those things! I guess it more personal of an issue than I'm willing to open up about on here.

Caeli, I think you're wrong when you say few people understand it. No, we haven't gone through exactly what you have, but there are many people who struggle with self worth, who think things will never change, and who wonder why God made them the way they are, or even bothered to make them at all.

The core of it is finding where your sense of self-worth comes from. You have to know that it comes from Christ alone, not from whether you're single or not, not from your kids if you have any, not from your friends, your body image, your job, or anything else. I also know, from 25 years of personal experience, that hearing this, even if you agree with it, isn't enough to just flip the switch and make you change. I know what it's like to hate myself and feel it's hopeless. I also know that change IS possible, that it doesn't have to be this way forever.

I recently wrote a book on it, which is available on Amazon.com for Kindle (you can get a free app if you don't have one) called "A More Confident You: Discovering Your True Value". If you or anyone else reading this emails me at jnesscpoa - at - gmail.com with a copy of the receipt and a paypal email address, I will gladly refund the money, whether you like the book or not. I want this book to help others like it has helped me, regardless of whether I make any money on it at all. Or, my recent blog entries (link in signature) discuss some of the points in the book.

__________________
John Ness

(((hugs))) what caused these negative thoughts about yourself? did something happen to you in your past?
the reason why i am asking is because i came from an abusive home and if that weren't enough i married into a family that have diarrhea of the mouth and caused A LOT of stress in my marriage.
what i learned is that i can't change my past BUT i don't allow the past to paralyze my life anymore, and live a life of peace all thanks to JESUS.
in the bible it says "for as he thinks in his heart, so he is." you are worthy and so deserving of the very best in life.

__________________
It's the hardest thing to give away And the last thing on your mind today It always goes to those that don't deserve It's the opposite of how you feel
When the pain they caused is just to real It takes everything you have just to say the word...
Forgiveness

It'll clear the bitterness away It can even set a prisoner free There is no end to what it's power can do So, let it go and be amazed By what you see through eyes of grace The prisoner that it really frees is you Forgiveness

Dr. David Burns Feeling Good:The New Mood Therapy. It has a Cognitive-behavioral approach to what you are experience with homework assignments. I believe it benefited me. You will find that a lot of your self-depreciation is not rational.

Mark