Epic fail on my part. Did I just enter the wrong ministry?

Good evening ladies and gents,

I'm basically just fishing for some thoughts here. I have a desire to help with the youth ministry at my church, but have some things to work through before I can make that commitment.

First, I helped with the middle school age group for quite some time. I was always assisting another teacher. When I finally stepped it up and took on a group of my own, I got destroyed. It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. It really was. It could have also been because the first week I taught on my own was the first week that the 5th graders moved up to the middle school classes and they kept basically telling us how much we sucked, for lack of a better phrase. I don't think they were used to true, biblical teaching. They were used to milk, cookies, and bible games.

I basically felt like I failed the kids so badly that I couldn't even redeem myself, and that I had no gift in Children's ministry.

When talking about next steps in our home church, I had a heart to heart with a couple of people and I realized that I have literally zero experience with young kids. Zero. The age group of 0-13 literally doesn't exist in my family. I am 28 and the third youngest person in my entire extended family.

Think I should have a heart to heart with my youth pastor and try to get plugged in to the high school program? I know my experiences would be much better suited for people in that age group, as I went through pretty much everything as a high schooler. Also, I just think that the way I work, I'm not some super fun character that appeals to small kids. I think that I really need to be able to evangelize, something I just can't do to kids.

Thoughts? Think I should give it another go, but with the right age group?

Heh. That's just normal for junior high kids. If you empower them by change, you're essentially not committed to them.

There're some things that you simply need to know. They're short, but you essentially have to keep your head through this, and set down quickly what you will and will not tolerate.

Normally the first time you meet kids, you can start with a very strict organization. They understand that. Generally they've experienced it in school, it's normal for them. Y'can't leave things up to kids, they'll conclude pretty soon that you don't care, if you exert no control. So if you're unwilling to exert this control, this shepherding of young kids, then yes, you're going to need to move up higher in age.

But there's a lot of reward working with junior high. The reward is that your enthusiasm and interest are still infectious at this age. At high school and higher you'll meet up with certain intellectual or even experiential challenges that are adult in nature. And without some familiarity or some structure of teachers in high school, you'll find yourself in deep water (not that that's wrong, but it's a learning experience). I'd recommend a book like "Hurt" by Chap Clark.

Junior high kids can encounter these things too, just less frequently. So the book could be useful there too.

__________________
"... not an unconcerned sitting of God in heaven, from which He merely observes the things that are done in the world; but that all-active and all-concerned seatedness on His throne above, by which He governs the world which He Himself hath made." John Calvin
regeneration does not act in people as if they were blocks and stones; nor does it abolish the will and its properties or coerce a reluctant will by force, but spiritually revives, heals, reforms Canons of Dordt, 1.16


"Have I become your enemy by telling the truth?" Paul

Paul is right in his assessment of the age groups and the approach. But, where is your heart? I have found that the Lord places within us the desires - He literally gives us the desires of our hearts. You will be successful and bear fruit in the areas that you are drawn to.... with the age groups that you feel a connection with. Where is your best connection? And, it may take some visiting, and serving in a assisting and observing capacity in order to discover this. It may take time to determine. As you picture yourself in years to come, where can you see yourself bearing fruit?

dude dont beat yourself up. thats what satan wants you to do. you cant let him when. if you have a heart for middle school students then keep going. Ministry is not all gumdrops and rainbows it is very frustrating especially with middle schoolers. Let me tell you by experience (bare with me)

Im the boys 6th grade small group leader at my church. I have about 16 to 20 in my group now it is difficult to stay on topic w/ kids who lives revolve around Mnt Dew Monsters, Farts and XBox 360. But they need to hear the parts of Christianity that might suck to them. I am in charge of the Puppet Ministry for our 3 and 4 Year olds. This ministry is ran by me and my middleschoolers. Now tonight was supposed to be our Christmas party but at the last minute everyone bailed on me. I was really disappointed b/c i planned so much (luckily i didnt buy anything yet) and i was so excited about it but in ministry you have to roll with the punches. Do i quit and say forget it b/c something didnt go my way? No! b/c most of the time in ministry it does not go your way.

Joshua 1:9
9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go

You have a thirst for evangelism. You just have to get a job that suits your fancy and purchase things to use as tools for ministry. Have someone with you at all times too and enjoy it! Of course you have to find someone who enjoys what u do and can make the time to help you.

I should bump this in honor of tomorrow, my first attempt at going solo teaching our middle school youth. The comments in here were pretty spot on, a lot of it was the change from 5th to middle school youth group. I also worked on myself, though.

I realized that I couldn't just be a teacher, I had to connect with these kids and help them work through some things in their lives. They are all in a really, really weird time in their lives right now and they need strong Christian role-models there to lead them in the right direction. I was trying to treat the job solely as a teaching position, and I really needed to look at it as half teaching, half big brother role.