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  #1  
Unread 20th November 2011, 07:21 PM
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Prayer God's not going to heal me.

I need encouragement and support (not debate, okay ) It's not that I don't believe in healing by God, because I do, He does, and He has. However, He told me this morning that He is not going to heal me (this time.)

Background... 25 years ago December 1st I was injured in an industrial accident. I've not worked since, and still go to physical therapy and psychotherapy 3x a week to help manage the results of the trauma. While all this year I have felt a "need" to begin to really study (again) and work on my desire for healing (faith building) I have really been actively claiming by faith. (I had been healed from a death bed illness maybe 40 years ago, so I know God heals.)
I had purposely requested God to heal me by or on the anniversary, no strings attached .
But, to me, He was very clear this morning in saying He is not going to heal me. (I haven't had the closeness I had with Him prior to the accident, since the accident, but this was done in the way God shares with me.)

I'm not feeling devastated...but am discouraged. I am also relieved in a way, because it's difficult at best when I say I believe in healing yet have not been healed...trying to share with others who wonder what kind of faith I have etc. Now I can say, God doesn't choose to heal me yet.
(I'm also adding the "yet" even now... though it's done with a different faith experience?)

So.... I need verses to support me. I know God didn't heal Paul though he earnestly asked 3x. (Yes, I believe Paul had a physical/psychological illness...and travelled with a doctor to help him.)

IDK I could use some encouragement. I'd like to know what plans God does have for me, because He hasn't directed me anywhere, and I'm alone in this (except for my doctors, of course.)

Thanks.
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  #2  
Unread 20th November 2011, 09:36 PM
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I don't have any verses to offer at the moment. What I have is real life. My aunt has suffered through 20 years of cancer and its effects. She was first diagnosed 20 years back, the treatments of which included chemo, bone marrow and radiation. She was healed, temporarily, as the same cancer returned years later, where a second round of treatments was needed. She now is week and feeble in body, using leg braces and a cane to even walk. She's only 56.

This last year an abnormality was revealed in a breast exam, and, it was determined that her best course of action was to have a double mastectomy and a slight round of radiation.

She was talking to family and revealed her struggle of faith, saying she's often fought the urge to ask God "Why". She knows she may never know. But God has shown her, is that through him, she's capable, she's strong enough to not just survive, but endure, to live on. She has a victors disposition through it all, and has been a huge supporter of mine in my current unemployment plight.

Reading it all, you sound disappointed, but at peace with it all. I can't speak for you, but you said you feel relieved at the revelation. Perhaps God has chosen to use you as an inspiration for others. You bring a faith-in-trouble that cuts to the core of human experience, and brings necessary, and, I feel, God-given perspective.

Sometimes all God requires of us is to be okay with it. It's not to say you'll have these conclusions, but God required that Abraham be okay with sacrificing his one and only son, and he required Joseph be okay with being sold into slavery and imprisoned. Both were rewarded for their faith that God would be faithful.

Keep your spirit up. Drown yourself in the Psalms. Pray and ask God to reveal himself to you in his word. Pray and then randomly open to a page in the Bible and read. Read until you're spoken to. Read until your need is met. It works.
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  #3  
Unread 21st November 2011, 12:30 AM
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However, He told me this morning that He is not going to heal me (this time.)
Try the spirit. Don't readily receive anything because you heard it clearly. When I read your message, I wasn't too sure about presumptuously entering in, but I do believe wants to give you some encouragement where you're at.

I've not worked since, and still go to physical therapy and psychotherapy 3x a week to help manage the results of the trauma.
This is not God's best for you. No matter what might have happened that allowed this to happen, this is not where God wants His children to remain. I realize that it's not always some kind of sin that brings this on. We're literally in a war zone and the enemy is in combat with the people of God.

Having said that, it's always good to cover the bases and eliminate stuff that lets the door open to the enemy to hinder and oppress. I'll list a few (This may not apply to you, but in case it does, and for the benefit of others)...

Speaking in judgment against God's servants. Might be your pastor or nationally known minister, televangelist, etc. Easily repented of. Renounce with your lips, purpose to stop and move on. Bless whomever...

Not discerning the Lord's body - Unscriptural and ungodly behavior during Communion, or even not discerning the anointing in your own church. Not esteeming the gifts of God in your midst. Possibly discounting and speaking in judgment about the Lord's work in other denominations/churches.

Moving against the anointing. Quenching the Spirit's move in others' lives and preventing God from having His way. (This is a big one.)

Speaking in judgment against the gifts of the Holy Spirit, prophecy, etc. It's all real. We judge everything, but be careful not to speak against it.

Being a murmurer or a complainer. God hates this.

Confess your sins to some person in the Spirit who knows God better than you and "pray for one another that you'll be healed". Receive prayer. This sometimes covers a lot of ground.

Being of the world. Some people give up on their walk and watch TV and accept entertainment for their provision of what gets them through life. Hanging out with worldly friends (Light has no fellowship with darkness). Being a partaker of another man's sins. People who watch movies and TV with demonic themes (vampire stuff, sorcery, etc.) We know better than to do this from the Word.

Hanging out in a comfortable yet powerless church. That means no anointing and services primarily just talk about being "saved". No overcoming lifestyle.

People who don't believe the devil(s) is/are real. (You're half whipped already.) Jesus believed in them and we're to resist them actively .

Speaking curses against other people, especially people in authority, government, your parents, etc. Curses are those things that do not make for blessing.

Your report of unbelief will keep you from entering in to your spiritual canaan land promises. It sounds like you're trying to get past that, but just in case.

The Paul thing, although debated by man, does not specifically state it was a physical infirmity. It says it was a messenger. People make a deduction based on another separate passage possibly eluding to physical infirmity. The enemy gets a lot of mileage with this, because it you receive that, you cannot pray the prayer of faith. To have faith, you have to hear and receive the promise of God in an area of your life. You can't believe beyond where the will of God is known.


While all this year I have felt a "need" to begin to really study (again) and work on my desire for healing (faith building)


This is the good part. No doubt your spirit feeling the drawing to the Word. If you continue to do this, the anointing on the Word will eventually minister life to you in regards to your healing. This will certainly draw opposition to steal the Word from you.

I had purposely requested God to heal me by or on the anniversary, no strings attached .
Timing is not in our hands. Don't put God on the clock.

But, to me, He was very clear this morning in saying He is not going to heal me.
This is the suspect part. Jesus already paid the price for your healing. The only thing that wouldn't qualify you is if you were in some kind of sin that would keep you from blessing your life in this way.

(I haven't had the closeness I had with Him prior to the accident, since the accident, but this was done in the way God shares with me.)
You can have the closeness. There isn't anything that can separate you from His intimacy. The enemy can and often will enter in and afflict. They can minister a cloud. Go to a church with the anointing being ministered. Request prayer. Talk to a pastor and have the anointing break the yoke.

Now I can say, God doesn't choose to heal me yet.
Don't give up on this.

So.... I need verses to support me.
Even Hezekiah restored God's life after he repented.

If you abide, whatever you ask for, believing, you can have.

IDK I could use some encouragement. I'd like to know what plans God does have for me, because He hasn't directed me anywhere, and I'm alone in this (except for my doctors, of course.)
It's time to get your vision renewed and confidence restored. It's time for the intimacy to come back and hope renewed in your journey toward your healing. It's time to get on board with His plan and time to get the oppressive cloud of doubt out of your life.

I've answered other posts like this and it pays to go over "the list" (like above) to ensure you're not letting the door open. I didn't have the heart or the strength this evening to go into the what ifs.

However, I stopped to pray for just a moment to see if He wanted to oppose your take on Him telling you that you wouldn't be healed, and God WAS IN IT. I believe the enemy is trying to deceive you.

Be careful of receiving signs from physical manifestations and fleeces in ways the enemy can influence. I worked for someone who thought every time the TV cracked, God was confirming what he was saying or thinking about. Stick with the eternal Word that says you can be healed. Go to a church with the anointing (I can't state this strongly enough.) Kick the enemy out of your life. Get on track to have the trauma healed too (This often is the gate where the enemy gets in.).

The first step is getting the intimacy restored. I think that things will fall into place for you after you achieve this. Go to where the power is!
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  #4  
Unread 21st November 2011, 12:45 AM
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The devil is a liar (and is in church every Sunday) and his best trick is in convincing people that he does not exist. Work on studying the charcter of God & I believe
you will find it is His nature to Heal. (Faith Required). But you study-the devil tries to
immitate God all the time-don't be fooled.
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Unread 21st November 2011, 01:56 AM
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I do believe sometimes we have things that are not changed for reasons, many never known to us, some of them brought to light later on. I'm glad you're here on the forums to discuss this with us and hopefully you can find some fellowship and support here.


I second ShakenForwardShakenFree has said (Great post, btw). No verses come to mind from memory, pretty tired and about to head to bed soon and I'm not a person who has much memorized, but I would start with Psalms as well to try and help you feel better and draw some strength.
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Unread 22nd November 2011, 12:26 AM
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...According to your faith be it unto you. <---> Matthew 9:29 (Words of Jesus)

Paul's "thorn in the flesh", was "the messenger of Satan", bringing up to mind his past misdeeds against believers when he was yet Saul.

Which thing was not taken away because as Paul states, it helped keep him humble, and further evidence shows, that though it troubled him some, it also impressed upon him the need to keep focusing on that which is ahead. (ala "all things work together for our good"... Ro. 8:28)


And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. <-----> 2nd Corinthians 12:7

For I am the least of the apostles, that am not meet to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. <-----> 1st Corinthians 15:9

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.
<-----> Philippians 3:13-15

Looking to man, and looking to The Lord is often alternatively contradictory.

Woe to them that go down to Egypt for help; and stay on horses, and trust in chariots, because they are many; and in horsemen, because they are very strong; but they look not unto the Holy One of Israel, neither seek the LORD! <-----> Isaiah 31:1

See also Mark 5:24-34

Yet, for many of us certain things will not/can not be remedied in full until we receive our "new bodies", in either the resurrection or the translation whichever comes first, for us in particular.

...According to your faith be it unto you. <---> Matthew 9:29 (Words of Jesus)

wm

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  #7  
Unread 22nd November 2011, 12:57 AM
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Why God does what He does we don't know. Clearly He heals some and others He doesn't.

I don't know if He will heal you or not. I pray He does!

Scripture is so open for private interpretation I won't go there. Where I get my strength and blessings comes directly from God from prayer. He opens my mind to so many things intended just for me that makes it impossible for me to share with others because it is private. Perhaps God is working with you that way.

There are many things I simply can not grasp that has happened in my life and around me. From the early death of my first born son at the age of 14, who my wife and I fought our parents to have, they wanted us to have an abortion. Some times it's just hard to find the reason or logic in the way things play out in life. I do take some comfort in knowing that all of this, every thing has already been done and is completed in God's Mind. We are merely playing catch up to God's speed.

Just trust in God, keep praying!
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Unread 22nd November 2011, 10:20 AM
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Kiss

Thank you all for your replies. Yes, I know you had to post the way you did, because you don't know me nor my real situation...

I think it's a physical thing, this not sensing God since the moment of accident, perhaps the head trauma has caused it...

I don't have a church home. I wasn't physically active for a while before my pastor died, and the man who took over, well took over. I received a letter of removal for lack of activity (I watched on tv and sent my tithe.) without them even talking to me once. A sign God didn't want me there? Doesn't matter. I tried visiting countless churches in the area, even outside my peripheral beliefs, to no avail. So I'm not judging nor offending anyone in that realm IRL

My family disowned, left, divorced me etc. In face, my ex had me divorce him so he could stay in the ministry even after he married his high school girl friend within 8 weeks after the divorce. My sons left as teens and now have families with teens of their own... we are civil but estranged. I can dream all I want, pray all I can, but to no avail...

My social circle is comprised of my Christian physical therapist, (and his staff), my Christian clinical psychologist (specialist in trauma, pain, stress), my uncaring MD, my caring but limited DMD (dental), my Christian neuro opthalmologist whom I see 2x a year, and my PCA who comes one day a week. I have "good" neighbors who talk nice to my face when we do so in passing a few times a month, and one who has been trying to fix my riding mower and mowing my yard in the meantime. No real relationship there, he and his wife are elderly and still have to both work full time due to a burglary that took their life savings. I know some wait staff at a restaurant where I used to eat every day...I rarely go anymore.
I made some internet connections, one at a mental health support site but alas everyone is struggling and limited in support, plus what can they do "but" pray for me? I just became crushed at cf.NET from the staff... and I won't go into details on that (but stay away from there!)

Now, I know this is long... and I need to get to pt. When I was first injured I could barely walk or talk for the first 8 months. So I'm doing really well considering, even 25 years later.
I ingest some 4-8 hours of Bible study, programs, etc a day. My good days I only get about 4-5 functional hours ...and on the days I go to PT and T, those hours are dedicated to that. So the Bible study is running "in the background" while I am unable to do much else....like now, the preacher who removed me from his church is preaching on the radio about why would God allow David's own son come against him... sigh.
Mom died 2 1/2 years ago and family dispersed once for all I think. I'm the youngest, always the scapegoat (they admitted this) and will never know as much as they do (yet I'm the only one with advanced degree, and active Christian.) It is what it is. But no fellowship in family, see.
I have 40 years in volunteering with the Girl Scouts, and 36 years with Boy Scouts... my best friend died last year in October. He was 102. Since then, the BSA has put me on the back burner... into a position I didn't know still existed "reserve Scouter" meaning they'll take your membership money but don't expect to do anything. On the shelf. But those are 2 examples of all of the groups I've given time to....even the Super Bowl and Orange Bowl committees limit me because any extensive event and I need either my service dog or motor chair. I'm too high maintenance for people, is what we know here.
Ok.... I knew this would happen, but I need to work with the above situation... right now I know it only sounds like rebuttals and excuses.
I obtained eternal life nearly 44 years ago, spent 26 years in direct ministry. I'm tired of it all.
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Unread 22nd November 2011, 12:20 PM
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Having read your posts I find myself confused as to why so many hurtful things have happened to you. It sounds like a lot over the years and I am sorry you are suffering this crisis of faith as well as your isolation from support, loyal friends. In a way I have been in your shoes before. Yes I will include you in my prayers and yet you really need at least one person who is loyal that you can physically see. Praying over this and going out to meet them as God places them on your path is one way. We may pray as if everything depends on God and then act as if everything depends on us. If you find it helpful you can chat with me anytime. I am new here so not sure if private messages can be sent yet. My name is Mark, I was once in religious life and my career is working with the homeless.
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Unread 22nd November 2011, 01:07 PM
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Reps: 45,265,608,591,371,992 (power: 45,265,608,591,374)
ShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond repute
ShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond reputeShakenForwardShakenFree has a reputation beyond repute
We never know who reads these posts and are encouraged and spurred to action. I cannot improve your plight, nor your condition. But I want you to know that I am touched by your story, and I pray that the Lord finds it in his wisdom to both heal you physically, and restore to you the joy of his salvation! He is there. He does care. Don't lose hope. Remember Job... though he slay you, continue to trust. Though he takes away, continue to give to Him you faith. He is trustworthy. He is faithful.

Peace to you.
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God bless, and run wild with the hope...
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