Here's an article on separating, from a Christian perspective, that may have some application to your circumstance: When Should a Married Couple Separate? - Christian foundations - Christianity.com
It sounds to me that you (individually, not as a couple) need to find a good marriage counselor as soon as possible to advise you about what to do here. Things like bondage and porn really shouldn't be something any spouse should have to face in a marriage (although certainly many, especially men, struggle with porn in marriage). The statement that you were led to have abortions by your husband troubles me greatly. To me, that is a pretty serious form of abuse in itself if your husband basically forced you to do that. Also, one of the main reasons for marriage from God's standpoint is to have children, so if your husband is saying no to that, that is a big concern to me as well. All of these are big flashing red lights. So I am really struggling myself as to what your course of action should be, despite God's general desire that we should stay in our marriages if at all possible. Again, it sounds like you need to find a wise counselor.
Also, if you have any leading in that direction, it may make sense for you to try to find a loving church that can support you in this situation. There are churches out there that are not judgmental or self-righteous and realize that many of us are going through tough situations--my church is such a church and hopefully you can find a similar church where you live. If they have a ministry where women in the church help counsel other women going through difficult times, that would be ideal.