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  #1  
Old 1st January 2010, 12:43 AM
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A little blue....

I just got finished watching the ball drop in Times Square, and I left it feeling a little depressed. Not major depressed, just blue.

The camera panned and showed all those folks who have somebody. As someone said, I am outside the window looking in at all those people who have somebody to love. And I don't.

And 99% of the time, I am okay with that. In fact I decided not to look for a romantic relationship on purpose. I am intentionally celebate and planned on being that way until I die.

Which is fine most of the time but not just at the moment. In fact at the moment it feels like the whole world has someone to kiss but me. God presents no hands to hold, no lips to kiss, no shoulder to rest your head on. Things which I at the moment very much miss.

I am sure that after a night's sleep I will be right back in the 99% too. I know that romantic love is no bed of roses, more often like a bed of nails in a lot of ways. I don't question my decision to devote my love to God not human love which is so fickle sometimes.

But for tonight at least, none of that thinking seems as real to me as a hand to hold, which I don't have.

Peace
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- Matthew 25:40
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  #2  
Old 1st January 2010, 12:54 AM
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I'm at a loss as to what I might say to encourage you, so I hope you can find some encouragement in knowing that I'm here.
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  #3  
Old 1st January 2010, 12:54 AM
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I have been down that road, plumsink and it is a lonely one.

Here's a hug for you!!

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Doubt requires more courage
than conviction does,
because conviction is a resting place
and doubt is infinite;
it is a passionate exercise.
Weve got to learn to live
with a full measure of uncertainty.
There is no last word.
That is the silence under
the chatter of our time.
John Patrick Shanley
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  #4  
Old 1st January 2010, 12:58 AM
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Thanks to you both.
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- Matthew 25:40
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  #5  
Old 1st January 2010, 07:20 AM
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  #6  
Old 1st January 2010, 11:13 AM
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what, where, who, when, whatever????

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dear brother sorry to hear you are a little blue for not having that someone special to hold in your arms. I too am in the same position Hope you are back in the 99% now

Shalom!
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  #7  
Old 1st January 2010, 12:02 PM
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Yes, I am back in the 99% now. I was just a little tired I think and overdue for bedtime.

Peace
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- Matthew 25:40
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  #8  
Old 1st January 2010, 01:10 PM
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Jesus, let it be ok

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Do you have a little furry companion to give you company during those lonely moments? Heh. I'm convinced that the best friends in the world are sometimes our furry friends (cats and dogs) - sometimes make much better friends that people!

I hope you are feeling better today.
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  #9  
Old 1st January 2010, 02:04 PM
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I was feeling a little lonely, too, but not when the ball dropped. There's a commercial that's playing now that shows people greeting their loved ones at the airport (I think it's for a credit card)...that's what did it for me. It's sad to think that I don't have a family to come home to...that there wouldn't be anyone waiting for me at the airport...that no one would be looking forward to seeing me.

My cat is a great companion...she has been for 15 years. Unfortunately, she is quite sick now.

Glad you are feeling better today, Robert.
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  #10  
Old 1st January 2010, 04:20 PM
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i thought that video was depressing, too. i watched it for a few seconds and then turned it off. and did something else. i thought to myself, in an effort to cheer myself, my loved ones and i....we aren't partying now, we've never rly had much to celebrate....but someday our turns gonna come. dont think it will come till we're in heaven but i want to have a 'party' with em all, celebrate the end of our suffering. "and we'll have a better time than those times square people". i agree with what winter said. animals definatly touch my spirit in a deep way.
power...i am sorry. i pray your cat will dramatically improve in health.
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